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I read a lot of sex scenes. PhotoJim Send a noteboard - 31/03/2010 02:44:08 PM
I'm reading mostly romance novels with a smattering of erotica thrown in, sex scenes are pretty standard fare for my normal reading. Only because I do read so many sex scenes, I can tell you that this is not the worst I've ever seen. However, it is far from good.

This is what happens when writers try to invent words and phases to signify parts of the body and sexual acts. The writing becomes so flowery and extravagant that it makes itself a glowing example of crap. It is referred to as "purple prose".

The writer is full of self importance. Just look at the opening few sentences. "...his bed in that bare, male room which he had never shared with a woman; at once a schoolboy's room and a lonely old man's room, the room left behind him and the room somewhere ahead of him in his life. But the narrow bed was full again, he was full again, and it was all there..." God help the poor soul who had to read a whole book of phrases like this. Let's take a typical scene from Lassie and rewrite it in this fashion. 'Lassie barked, conveying the message of hope. At once the bark told of a well, at once a giver of life water and a trap for the unsteady. The well, which had once been dug by men with dreams, was now full. Full of water, full of despair, and somewhere inside that well was a boy named Timmy.' *gags*

All in all, I give it a 2/10. Mostly the second point is for the creative use of "aureole of mauve-brown skin where the cheeks of the backside divided at the end of her spine". After all, an aureole "is the radiance of luminous cloud which, in paintings of sacred personages, surrounds the whole figure". Best I can figure, the lady needs to do a better job on the personal hygiene. Perhaps a bidet would be of assistance.
Everybody was Kung Fu fighting!

Not to be rude but who are you? And I suppose equally important, where are we?

The Wotmaniac formerly known as nomad.
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How bad would you rate this sex scene? - 31/03/2010 08:25:07 AM 850 Views
- 31/03/2010 08:39:43 AM 583 Views
I gave the title above the quote *NM* - 31/03/2010 08:53:01 AM 207 Views
I always use practical parenthesis when dirty-talking". - 31/03/2010 08:51:49 AM 597 Views
I wish she had talked about "The Situation" - 31/03/2010 08:54:44 AM 579 Views
Hey! Veins can be sexy! - 02/04/2010 12:51:58 AM 508 Views
That's outstanding. - 31/03/2010 12:40:41 PM 554 Views
maybe the editor was out of practice *NM* - 31/03/2010 01:10:42 PM 203 Views
Re: That's outstanding. - 05/04/2010 03:00:28 PM 475 Views
I read a lot of sex scenes. - 31/03/2010 02:44:08 PM 578 Views
Ha! - 31/03/2010 08:31:53 PM 478 Views
Wow. Pretty bad. - 31/03/2010 03:08:21 PM 440 Views
I'm gonna be the dissenting voice and say, not that bad. - 31/03/2010 03:34:25 PM 429 Views
In context, it was even worse. Trust me. - 31/03/2010 08:30:29 PM 457 Views
I seem to recall us talking about something like this... - 02/04/2010 12:53:05 AM 545 Views
Bad command or file name. *NM* - 01/04/2010 09:13:40 AM 210 Views
I was hoping that it was a bad translation *NM* - 02/04/2010 04:09:33 AM 219 Views
HAHAHAhahaha. - 02/04/2010 09:28:04 AM 459 Views
- 02/04/2010 09:48:51 AM 458 Views
I'm kind of with Legolas. This just reminds me of modernists. - 05/04/2010 10:04:35 PM 469 Views

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