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All Quotes

Here's a list of all the quotes that are currently stored in the Read and Find Out database. They're handily grouped by category, which makes browsing through them a little bit easier.

If you have any bright ideas for new quotes, then feel free to suggest them to me!

Sci-Fi/Fantasy/Spec Fic (Back to top)

RUINED? MY HARVEST? BUGGER THAT! Death
from Reaper Man by Terry Pratchett. Suggested by Nebhead
If more of us valued food and cheer above hoarded gold, it would be a merrier world. Thorin Oakenshield
from The Hobbit by J.R.R. Tolkien. Suggested by Fantasy
Remember this, boy. All dwarves may be bastards, yet not all bastards need be dwarves. Tyrion Lannister to Jon Snow
from A Game of Thrones by George R.R. Martin. Suggested by Napoleon62
If you would take a man's life, you owe it to him to look into his eyes and hear his final words. And if you cannot bear to do that, then perhaps the man does not deserve to die. Lord Eddard Stark after executing a deserter
from A Game of Thrones by George R.R. Martin. Suggested by Napoleon62
The Guide is definitive. Reality is frequently inaccurate.
from The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy by Douglas Adams. Suggested by Bergioyn
I'm Mad Al, he's Sane Alex, and that's Adrian, who says he's not mad but can't prove it. Mad Al, to Moist Von Lipwig
from Going Postal by Terry Pratchett. Suggested by LordPerrin
Everyone else, they work, they ask for recompense, and they are respected for it. Not Mercenaries. We get a bad name just for doing our jobs. Denth, to Vivenna
from Warbreaker by Brandon Sanderson. Suggested by LightsongTheBold
If you're always on time, it implies that you never have anything better you should be doing. Kelsier
from Mistborn: The Final Empire by Brandon Sanderson. Suggested by LightsongTheBold
But you can't kill me, Lord Tyrant. I represent that one thing you've never been able to kill, no matter how hard you try. I am hope. Kelsier, to the Lord Ruler
from Mistborn: The Final Empire by Brandon Sanderson. Suggested by LightsongTheBold
My dear, did you just try to prove the existence of God through the use of your cleavage?
from Warbreaker by Brandon Sanderson. Suggested by LightsongTheBold
I try to avoid having thoughts. They lead to other thoughts, and—if you’re not careful—those lead to actions. Actions make you tired. I have this on rather good authority from someone who once read it in a book. Lightsong the Bold
from Warbreaker by Brandon Sanderson. Suggested by LightsongTheBold
In the beginning, there was the Word. Then came the...word processor. Then came the thought processor. Then came the end of literature. And so it goes. Martin Silenus
from Hyperion by Dan Simmons. Suggested by Ghavrel
By the use of the language of sorrow I had for the time being obliterated my sorrow - so powerful is the charm of words, which for us reduces to mangaeable entities all the passions that would otherwise madden and destroy us. Severian
from The Shadow of the Torturer by Gene Wolfe. Suggested by Ghavrel
It is said that it is the peculiar quality of time to conserve fact, and that it does so by rendering our past falsehoods true. Severian
from The Shadow of the Torturer by Gene Wolfe. Suggested by Ghavrel
My pen halts, though I do not. Reader, you will walk no more with me. It is time we both take up our lives. Severian
from Citadel of the Autarch by Gene Wolfe. Suggested by Ghavrel
If a man is no more than such a colony [of cells], a man is nothing; but we know instinctively that a man is more. What happens, then, to that part that is more? Severian
from The Shadow of the Torturer by Gene Wolfe. Suggested by Ghavrel
I'd put a curse of stupidity on you if I could improve on nature. Goblin
from The Black Company. Suggested by Ghavrel
Umm... Sometimes I forget what I was going to say. Sometimes I remember things everyone else has forgotten for ever and ever. Does that ever happen to you? Delirium, to Dream
from Sandman: Season of Mists by Neil Gaiman. Suggested by Ghavrel
I think you're very nice. I think twinkle's a nice word. So's viridian. I met a lady once who had an imaginary fish. Delirium
from Sandman by Neil Gaiman. Suggested by Ghavrel
I like the way colors taste. Except I don't like crimsons...or turquoises...especially when they put their heads into their shells and won't play and when you break their shells to let them out they die... Delirium
from Sandman by Neil Gaiman. Suggested by Ghavrel
History comforts the dull-witted. Kellanved
from Deadhouse Gates by Steven Erikson. Suggested by Ghavrel
Death! Ride to ruin and the world's ending! Eomer
from The Return of the King by J.R.R. Tolkien. Suggested by Ghavrel
Many that live deserve death. And some that die deserve life. Can you give it to them? Then do not be too eager to deal out death in judgment. Gandalf, to Frodo
from The Fellowship of the Ring by J.R.R. Tolkien. Suggested by Ghavrel
You cannot pass! Gandalf, to the Balrog
from The Fellowship of the Ring by J.R.R. Tolkien. Suggested by Ghavrel
One Ring to rule them all,
One Ring to find them,
One Ring to bring them all
and in the darkness bind them.
Inscription on the One Ring
from The Fellowship of the Ring by J.R.R. Tolkien. Suggested by Ghavrel
It's a dangerous business, Frodo, going out of your door... You step into the Road, and if you don't keep your feet, there is no knowing where you might be swept off to. Bilbo Baggins, to Frodo
from The Fellowship of the Ring by J.R.R. Tolkien. Suggested by Ghavrel
"Difficult" and "impossible" are cousins often mistaken for one another, with very little in common. Locke Lamora to Requin
from Red Seas Under Red Skies by Scott Lynch. Suggested by Tavi
I take some of it back. You might still be a lying, cheating, low-down, greedy, grasping, conniving, pocket-picking son of a bitch. Jean Tannen, to Locke Lamora
from Red Seas Under Red Skies by Scott Lynch. Suggested by Tavi
You have an amazing lack of good sense for one so young. Belgarath the Sorcerer, to Garion
from Pawn of Prophecy by David Eddings. Suggested by Mat Girl
As Henry Dean, the great sage and eminent junkie would have put it, Flip-flop, hippety-hop, offa your rocker and over the top, life's a fiction and the world's a lie, so put on some Creedence and let's get high.
Eddie Dean speaking of his brother
from The Dark Tower II The Drawing by Stephen King. Suggested by Dominic
No one ever does live happily ever after, but we leave the children to find that out for themselves.
Roland
from The Dark Tower V Wolves of the by Stephen King. Suggested by Dominic
The man in black fled across the desert, and the Gunslinger followed opening line of Dark Tower I - The Gunslinger
from The Dark Tower I The Gunslinge by Stephen King. Suggested by Dominic
I don't know half of you half as well as I should like; and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve. Bilbo Baggins
from The Fellowship of the Ring by J.R.R. Tolkien. Suggested by Kahlee
Does the walker choose the path, or the path the walker? The final words in The Book of the Dead
from Sabriel by Garth Nix. Suggested by Yunalesca
Allow me to begin again. Greetings, Akar Kessell. I am Drizzt Do'Urden, ranger of Gwaeron Windstrom, guardian of Icewind Dale. I have come to kill you.
from The Crystal Shard by R.A. Salvatore. Suggested by Mats Gambling Buddy
I am Gandalf, and Gandalf means me! Gandalf the Grey, to Bilbo Baggins
from The Hobbit by JRR Tolkien. Suggested by Ryan
Garroting Deep has sent Caer-Caveral to Morrinmoss. But he cannot claim you. Turiya Raver
from The Power That Preserves by Stephen R. Donaldson. Suggested by Nebhead
Less Lust through Less Protein, Eggs, Meat, Beans, Cheese, and Sitting. a billboard sign
from Neverwhere by Neil Gaiman. Suggested by Nebhead
He is the Shield Anvil. Fener knows grief, so much grief that it is beyond his capacity to withstand it. And so he chooses a human heart. Armoured. A mortal soul, to assume the sorrow of the world. The Shield Anvil. a captain, speaking of Itkovian to Anaster
from Memories of Ice by Steven Erikson. Suggested by Nebhead
How many miles to Babylon?
Three score miles and ten.
Can I get there by candlelight?
Yes, and back again.
Yes, if your feet are nimble and light,
You can get there by candlelight.
a childrens' rhyme
from Stardust by Neil Gaiman. Suggested by Nebhead
Nice Monkey! a guard's last words, to the Librarian
from Guards! Guards! by Terry Pratchett. Suggested by Nebhead
The Filthy And Dangerous Vice of Smoking, which Offends the Nose, Deadens the Palate, Causes Ageing of the Skin, and Enforces a Progressive Decrepitude of the Body Entire. Tobacco will Slowly and Surely Kill You. a poster
from The Etched City by K. J. Bishop. Suggested by Nebhead
Long Live The Changing Things To A More Equitable State While Retaining Due Respect For The Traditions Of Our Forebears And Of Course Not Harming The August Personage Of The Emperor Endeavor. a revolutionary
from Interesting Times by Terry Pratchett. Suggested by Nebhead
No one would have believed, in the last years of the nineteenth century, that human affairs were being watched keenly and closely by intelligences greater than man's and yet as mortal as his own.. intro to The War of the Worlds
from The War of the Worlds by H.G. Wells. Suggested by Dragonsworn
What disguise? This is my lucky shirt. a ship captain, to Kalam
from Deadhouse Gates by Steven Erikson. Suggested by Nebhead
The vastness of its mad-made architecture disobeyed not only rules of style but, it was said, of physics. about Perdido Street Station
from Iron Council by China Mieville. Suggested by Nebhead
'I was walking through the roads to clear my brain,' he said. 'And suddenly fire, earthquake, death!' Curate to Narrator
from The War of the Worlds by H.G. Wells. Suggested by Dragonsworn
- Do all Imass think about futility?
- No. Few think at all.
- Why is that?
- Because, Adjunct, it is futile.
Adjunct Lorn and Onos T'oolan
from Gardens of the Moon by Steven Erikson. Suggested by Nebhead
When Mister Safety Catch Is Not On, Mister Crossbow Is Not Your Friend. advanced weapon training, Detritus style
from Night Watch by Terry Pratchett. Suggested by Nebhead
The tree of nonsense is watered with error, and from its branches swing the pumpkins of disaster. Pont summing up explanation to other characters
from The Gone-Away World by Nick Harkaway. Suggested by Stephen
Things that try to look like things often do look more like things than things. Well-known fact. Granny Weatherwax
from Wyrd Sisters by Terry Pratchett. Suggested by Colonel Logain
The combination of modern ordnance and outdated tactics had, as ever, created enormous casualties on both sides.
from Excession by Iain M Banks. Suggested by snoopcester
I'm not a great believer in awards-of course the fact that I've never won one has nothing to do with it at all! Iain Banks's view of awards
from An interview by Iain Banks . Suggested by snoopcester
The two of you are distinct failures as criminals but good fellows nonetheless. I wish you all the turds and snowflakes you require. Good day! Wolfe
from The Portrait of Mrs Charbuque by Jeffrey Ford. Suggested by Ouranid
Always store beer in a dark place. from the Notebooks of Lazarus Long
from Time Enough For Love by Robert A. Heinlein. Suggested by imlad
When I was growing up, I fantasized about a house like this. New furniture. A backyard. Parents who gave parties and invited lots of friends.

I wanted something like this, too. A brick house in Hampstead and a father who didn't travel around the world killing people.
Gabriel and Maya
from The Golden City by John Twelve Hawks. Suggested by Tigr
The human mind can override any nerve in the body. Reverend Mother Gaius Helen Mohiam, to Paul Atreides.
from Dune by Frank Herbert. Suggested by General Cyan
Facts, exact numbers, reassurance...a Jedi seeks not these things. Kyp Durron to Toval Seyah aboard Centerpoint Station
from Star Wars: Fury by Aaron Allston. Suggested by Tavi
Some mysteries are better off with their throats slit. Slendri, to Requin
from Red Sea Under Red Skies by Scott Lynch. Suggested by Tavi
Master Kosta. What a pleasure! Selendri tells me you've expressed an interest in getting killed. Requin to Locke Lamora
from Red Sea Under Red Skies by Scott Lynch. Suggested by Tavi
But this is silly - we could sit here all night contrasting cock lengths. I say mine is five feet long, you say yours is six, and shoots fire upon command. Requin to Locke Lamora
from Red Sea Under Red Skies by Scott Lynch. Suggested by Tavi
I'm particularly fond of our priesthood of the Benefactor, since our main duties seem to be sitting around and pretending that the Benefactor doesn't exist. When we're not stealing things, that is. Locke Lamora
from The Lies of Locke Lamora by Scott Lynch. Suggested by Tavi
Nice bird, asshole. Locke Lamora to the Falconer
from The Lies of Locke Lamora by Scott Lynch. Suggested by Tavi
His followers called him Mahasamatman and said he was a god. He preferred to drop the Maha- and the -atman, however, and called himself Sam. He never claimed to be a god. But then, he never claimed not to be a god. Beginning of Lord of Light
from Lord of Light by Roger Zelazny. Suggested by Corwin
He is sometimes called Maitreya, meaning Lord of Light... Epigraph to the final chapter
from Lord of Light by Roger Zelazny. Suggested by Corwin
Better one of us died in Hellwell, for great is the pride of the First. Kali, to Sam
from Lord of Light by Roger Zelazny. Suggested by Corwin
Death and Light are everywhere, always, and they begin, end, strive, attend, into and upon the Dream of the Nameless that is the world, burning words within Samsara, perhaps to create a thing of beauty. End of Lord of Light
from Lord of Light by Roger Zelazny. Suggested by Corwin
Aurë entuluva! Day shall come again! Battle-cry of Hurin
from The Silmarillion by J.R.R. Tolkien. Suggested by Corwin
The doom lies in yourself, not in your name. Gwindor, to Túrin
from The Silmarillion by J.R.R. Tolkien. Suggested by Corwin
I am not like the others now, for no unicorn was ever born who could regret, but I do. I regret. The Unicorn, to Schmendrick the Magician
from The Last Unicorn by Peter S. Beagle. Suggested by Comet Sedai
You should try not to talk so much, friend. You'll sound far less stupid that way. Breeze, to Yeden
from Mistborn - The Final Empire by Brandon Sanderson. Suggested by ColossalShadow
I solemnly swear that I am up to no good.
from Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban by J.K. Rowling. Suggested by Milla
Hello. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die. Inigo Montoya, to Count Rugen
from The Princess Bride by William Goldman/S Morganstern. Suggested by Comet Sedai
Inconceivable! Vizzini, the Sicilian
from The Princess Bride by William Goldman/S Morganstern. Suggested by Comet Sedai
As...you...wish... Westley to Buttercup, after she has shoved him down the hill
from The Princess Bride by William Goldman/S Morganstern. Suggested by Comet Sedai
Call a jack a jack. Call a spade a spade. But always call a whore a lady. Their lives are hard enough, and it never hurts to be polite. Kvothe's father
from The Name of the Wind by Patrick Rothfuss. Suggested by Tavi
Come... dry your eyes, for you are life, rarer than a quark and unpredictable beyond the dreams of Heisenberg; the clay in which the forces that shape all things leave their fingerprints most clearly. Jon, to Laurie
from Watchmen by Alan Moore. Suggested by Tim
Touched by her fingers, the two surviving chocolate people copulate desperately, losing themselves in a melting frenzy of lust, spending the last of their brief borrowed lives in a spasm of raspberry cream and fear. Narrator
from Sandman, Brief Lives (vol. VII) by Neil Gaiman. Suggested by Tim
Peace is a lie, there is only passion.
Through passion, I gain strength.
Through strength, I gain power.
Through power, I gain victory.
Through victory, my chains are broken.
The Force shall free me.
Code of the Sith
from Darth Bane: Path of Destruction, A Novel of the Old Republic by Drew Karpyshyn. Suggested by Scott Blademaster
Two there should be; no more, no less. One to embody power, the other to crave it. Darth Bane
from Darth Bane: Path of Destruction, A Novel of the Old Republic by Drew Karpyshyn. Suggested by Scott Blademaster
If our society seems more nihilistic than that of previous eras, perhaps this is simply a sign of our maturity as a sentient species. As our collective consciousness expands beyond a crucial point, we are at last ready to accept life's fundamental truth: that life's only purpose is life itself. Chairman Sheng-ji Yang
from Looking God in the Eye by Michael Ely. Suggested by lord-of-shadow
Water is for drinking when there is no wine. Malak, to Conan
from Conan the Destroyer by Robert Jordan. Suggested by Dragonsworn
God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffable game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time.
from Good Omens by Terry Pratchett & Neil Gaiman. Suggested by beetnemesis
Albert grunted. "Do you know what happens to lads who ask too many questions?"
Mort thought for a moment.
"No," he said eventually, "what?"
There was silence.
Then Albert straightened up and said, "Damned if I know. Probably they get answers, and serve 'em right."
On the advisability of inquisitiveness
from Mort by Terry Pratchett. Suggested by beetnemesis
The ships hung in the sky in much the same way that bricks don't. Describing the Vogon fleet
from The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy by Douglas Adams. Suggested by Tavi
If there's anything more important than my ego around, I want it caught and shot now. Zaphod Beeblebrox
from The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy by Douglas Adams. Suggested by Tavi
Measure twice. Label clearly. Eat elsewhere. The three rules of the chemist
from The Name of the Wind by Patrick Rothfuss. Suggested by Tavi
Some of us are so sharp, we could just cut ourselves. Mr. Croup, to Mr. Vandemar, concerning Richard Mayhew
from Neverwhere by Neil Gaiman. Suggested by Comet Sedai
Our opponent is an alien starship packed with atomic bombs. We have a protractor. Fraa Erasmus, taking inventory for an upcoming adventure.
from Anathem by Neal Stephenson. Suggested by Palatine
Voodoo is a very interesting religion for the whole family, even those members of it who are dead.
from Good Omens by Terry Pratchett & Neil Gaiman. Suggested by Kalavati
The truth may be out there, but lies are inside your head.
from Hogfather by Terry Pratchett. Suggested by Kalavati
Real stupidity beats artificial intelligence every time.
from Hogfather by Terry Pratchett. Suggested by Kalavati
People would take pains to tell her that beauty was only skin-deep, as if a man ever fell for an attractive pair of kidneys.
from Maskerade by Terry Pratchett. Suggested by Kalavati
I like the idea of democracy. You have to have someone everyone distrusts, that way, everyone's happy. Brutha
from Small Gods by Terry Pratchett. Suggested by Kalavati
Gravity is a habit that is hard to shake off.
from Small Gods by Terry Pratchett. Suggested by Kalavati
You can't go around building a better world for people. Only people can build a better world for people. Otherwise it's just a cage.
from Witches Abroad by Terry Pratchett. Suggested by Kalavati
The trouble is that things never get better, they just stay the same, only more so.
from Eric by Terry Pratchett. Suggested by Kalavati
The three rules of the Librarians of Time and Space are: 1) Silence; 2) Books must be returned no later than the date last shown; and 3) Do not interfere with the nature of causality.
from Guards! Guards! by Terry Pratchett. Suggested by Kalavati
I'd like to know if I could compare you to a summer's day. Because -- well, June 12th was quite nice, and...
from Wyrd Sisters by Terry Pratchett. Suggested by Kalavati
Dwarfs don't have to be tactful. Generations of capering fools in motley have won me the right to dress badly and say any damn thing that comes into my head Tyrion Lannister to Jon Snow
from A Game of Thrones by George R. R. Martin. Suggested by MightyYT
Overexcited? No! I'm getting very calmly worried that someone might shoot me! Newton Pulsifer, to Anathema Device
from Good Omens by Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett. Suggested by Gher
...he went to squeaking and squealing in one of those languages wizards use so the rest of us will think there's something terribly strange and mystical about what they do, kind of like lawyers. Murgen, watching One-Eye.
from She is the Darkness by Glen Cook. Suggested by lord-of-shadow
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT SAYS, I NEVER LAID A FINGER ON HIM. Death, talking about Elvis Presley with some Bikers
from Good Omens by Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett. Suggested by Gher
- You're in America now. Our idea of diplomacy is showing up with a gun in one hand and a sandwich in the other and asking which you'd prefer.
- You brought a sandwich?
- Who do I look like, Kissinger?
Harry Dresden talking with Captain Luccio
from Turn Coat, The Dresden Files, book by Jim Butcher. Suggested by Cannoli
War makes monsters of us all. Thoros of Myr, the Red Priest, to Brienne of Tarth
from A Feast for Crows by George R.R. Martin. Suggested by Napoleon62
This is a time for beasts, for wolves and lions and angry dogs, for ravens and carrion crows. Jaime "Kingslayer" Lannister, to himself
from A Feast for Crows by George R.R. Martin. Suggested by Napoleon62
I like my history dead. Dead history is writ in ink, the living sort in blood. Rodrick The Reader to Asha Greyjoy, regarding her Queensmoot
from A Feast for Crows by George R.R. Martin. Suggested by Napoleon62
When you play the game of thrones, you win or you die. There is no middle ground. Cersei Lannister, to Lord Eddard Stark
from A Game of Thrones by George R.R. Martin. Suggested by Napoleon62
Coll, a hero? But, but he's bald! Taran to Gwydion
from The Book of Three by Lloyd Alexander. Suggested by dadof5
"Tiny. But fierce!" Sanya, about Karrin Murphy
from Changes by Jim Butcher. Suggested by Tavi
Just think egotesticle. Angua to Cherry
from Feet of Clay by Terry Pratchett. Suggested by Danu
You get what anybody gets - you get a lifetime. Death to a dead man
from Sandman: Preludes and Nocturnes by Neil Gaiman. Suggested by AliasRY
-You're Hell's Angels, then? What chapter are you from?

- REVELATIONS, CHAPTER SIX. Verses two to eight.
Biker Gang and the four Horseman of the Apocalypse
from Good Omens: The Nice and Accurate Prophecies of Agnes Nutter by Neil Gaiman, Terry Pratchett . Suggested by AliasRY
When the first living thing existed, I was there, waiting. When the last living thing dies, my job is finished. I'll put the chairs on tables, turn out the lights and lock the universe behind me when I leave. Death
from Sandman: Dream Country by Neil Gaiman. Suggested by AliasRY
They believe themselves Lucifer's equals, Cain, all these pitiful little gnats. But there is only one that we have ever owned to be our superior. There is but one greater than us, and to him … to him we no longer speak. Lucifer to Cain about demons
from Sandman: Season of Mists by Neil Gaiman. Suggested by AliasRY
The Gods of Nippon are very powerful. We are no longer worshiped as once we were, but we have adapted. Times have changed, and we have changed with them. We are expanding – assimilating other pantheons, later gods, new altars and icons. Marilyn Monroe is ours now, as are King Kong and Lady Liberty. Susano-o-no-Mikoto
from Sandman: Season of Mists by Neil Gaiman. Suggested by AliasRY
It is sometimes a mistake to climb, it is always a mistake never even to make the attempt. Dream
from Sandman: Fables and Reflections by Neil Gaiman. Suggested by AliasRY
I wanted a tale of graceful ends. I wanted a play about a king who … leaves his kingdom … about a man who turns his back on magic … I am Prince of Stories, Will, but I have no story of my own. Nor shall I ever … I thank you. Dream to Will Shakespeare
from Sandman: The Kindly Ones by Neil Gaiman. Suggested by AliasRY
He was a very clever doggy. He said things like … like … "I would feel infinitely more comfortable in your presence if you would agree to treat gravity as a law, rather than one of a number of suggested options." Delirium describing Barnabus
from Sandman: The Kindly Ones by Neil Gaiman. Suggested by AliasRY
There is no struggle too vast, no odds too overwhelming, for even should we fail - should we fall - we will know that we have lived. Anomander Rake
from Malazan Book Of The Fallen by Steven Erikson. Suggested by FuRiA_KuTaSoW
I greet you as guests and so I will not crush the life from you and devour your souls with peals of laughter. No, instead I will make some tea. Gothos
from Malazan Book Of The Fallen by Steven Erikson. Suggested by FuRiA_KuTaSoW
Assimilate this!
Lt Commander Worf to a group of Borg he has just shot.
from Star Trek First Contact. Suggested by Watcher
A human has only two eyes. Both are on the front of the face. It is the same with most earth species. These human eyes are very similar to our main eyes. But humans seem fascinated by my stalk eyes. One of the humans, Marco, has said they “creep him out big time.” I believe this is a compliment.
- From the Earth Diary of Aximili-Esgarrouth-Isthill
from The Alien, 8th book in the Animorphs series by K.A. Applegate. Suggested by Bergioyn
What you know about women, I could juggle Bob the Skull to Harry Dresden
from Storm Front by Jim Butcher. Suggested by Tavi
Well, Magellan, no base running or boldly going where no man has gone before for you - not until you get yourself grounded. Harry Dresden to Molly Carpenter, about her sexuality
from Proven Guilty by Jim Butcher. Suggested by Tavi
Don't yadda yadda the Lord, Harry. It's disrespectful. Michael Carpenter to Harry Dresden
from Grave Peril by Jim Butcher. Suggested by Tavi
"Molly?" I asked. "Wow, you sound all grown-up now."
She laughed. "Yeah, the breast fairy came to visit and everything. Did you want to talk to my mom?"
Some might find it significant that it took me a second to realize she wasn't being literal about the faerie. Sometimes I hate my life.
Harry Dresden
from Death Masks by Jim Butcher. Suggested by Tavi
I'd been in hairier situations than this one. Actually, it's sort of depressing, thinking how many times I'd been in them. But if experience had taught me anything, it was this: no matter how screwed up things are, they can get a whole lot worse Harry Dresden
from Blood Rites by Jim Butcher. Suggested by Tavi
I went over the facts in my head, and admired how much uglier the situation had just become. Over the years I've learned that ignorance is more than just bliss. It's freaking orgasmic ecstasy. Harry Dresden
from Blood Rites by Jim Butcher. Suggested by Tavi
"It gets sort of Zen after a while." Butters said brightly. "Life is a journey. Time is a river. The door is a jar." Waldo Butters to Harry Dresden
from Dead Beat by Jim Butcher. Suggested by Tavi
"Holy shit,"I breathed. "Hellhounds."
"Harry," Michael said sternly. "You know I hate it when you swear."
"You're right. Sorry. Holy shit," I breathed, "heckhounds."
Harry Dresden and Michael Carpenter
from Grave Peril by Jim Butcher. Suggested by Tavi
I'd hate to find out that the universe really wasn't conspiring against me. It would jerk the rug out from under my persecution complex. Harry Dresden
from Grave Peril by Jim Butcher. Suggested by Tavi
Yeah, but I'm not agnostic. Just nonpartisan. Theological Switzerland, that's me. Harry Dresden, to Sanya
from Death Masks by Jim Butcher. Suggested by Tavi
I wanted to smack the clock for waking me up, but I reined in the impulse. I'm not against a little creative violence now and then, but you have to draw the line somewhere. I wouldn't sleep in the same room with a person who would smack Mickey Mouse. Harry Dresden
from Death Masks by Jim Butcher. Suggested by Tavi
This is what happens when I don't wear the coat. People start thinking I'm not a superhero. Harry Dresden to Karrin Murphy
from Proven Guilty by Jim Butcher. Suggested by Tavi
But just because you're paranoid doesn't mean there isn't an invisible demon about to eat your face. Harry Dresden
from Storm Front by Jim Butcher. Suggested by Tavi
It hurts! Ow! Ow, it hurts! It hurts to be this good! Carlos Ramirez, fighting a pack of super-ghouls
from White Night by Jim Butcher. Suggested by Tavi
Not bad. For a virgin. Harry Dresden to Carlos Ramirez
from White Night by Jim Butcher. Suggested by Tavi
"Oh, what would you like on your vegetarian pizza?"
"Dead pigs and cows." She glanced up at me and wrinkled her nose.
"They're vegetarians," I said defensively.
Inari Raith and Harry Dresden
from Blood Rites by Jim Butcher. Suggested by Tavi
I choose to exercise my status as an apex predator. And I laugh in the face of cholesterol. Harry Dresden
from Blood Rites by Jim Butcher. Suggested by Tavi
I'm brilliant as well as skilled. It's a great burden, all of that on top of my angelic good looks. But I try to soldier on as best I can. Carlos Ramirez to Harry Dresden
from Dead Beat by Jim Butcher. Suggested by Tavi
"You" - he scrunched up his nose, digging in his memory - "tapped that ass. Presumably, it was phat." Sanya to Harry Dresden
from Changes by Jim Butcher. Suggested by Tavi
The Female Once-Over - a process by which one woman creates a detailed profile of another woman based upon about a million subtle details of clothing, jewelry, makeup, and body type, and then decides how much of a social threat she might be. Men have a parallel process, but it's binary: Does he have beer? If yes, will he share with me? Harry Dresden
from Changes by Jim Butcher. Suggested by Tavi
When you know not whereof you speak, your mouth is best used for chewing. Walter Slovotsky, to Piell
from The Silver Crown by Joel Rosenberg. Suggested by Joel
Let's just say if complete and utter chaos were lightning, then he'd be the sort to stand on a hilltop in a thunderstorm wearing wet copper armor and shouting, "All gods are bastards." Rincewind, about Twoflower
from The Color of Magic by Terry Pratchett. Suggested by Tavi
It was all very well going on about pure logic and how the universe was ruled by logic and the harmony of numbers, but the plain fact of the matter was that the Disc was manifestly traversing space on the back of a giant turtle and the gods had a habit of going around to atheists' houses and smashing their windows. Rincewind's thoughts
from The Color of Magic by Terry Pratchett. Suggested by Tavi
Only elves and trolls had survived the coming of Man to the Discworld; the elves because they were altogether too clever by half, and the trollen folk because they were at least as good as humans at being nasty, spiteful, and greedy. Rincewind's thoughts
from The Color of Magic by Terry Pratchett. Suggested by Tavi
Death, although exceptionally busy at all times, decided that He now had a hobby. There was something about the wizard that irked Him beyond measure. He didn't keep appointments, for one thing. Death's thoughts about Rincewind
from The Color of Magic by Terry Pratchett. Suggested by Tavi
Either dragons should exist completely or fail to exist at all, he felt. A dragon only half-existing was worse than the extremes. Rincewind's thoughts before riding a dragon
from The Color of Magic by Terry Pratchett. Suggested by Tavi
Lassie would have smelled something. She would have given a clear, concise warning. One bark for gruffs, two barks for Nickelheads. Harry Dresden to his dog, Mouse
from Small Favor by Jim Butcher. Suggested by Tavi
If they ask for me
Say, she rides where comets go,
And outpaces light.
haiku composed by Janet Allegri
from The Engines of God by Jack McDevitt. Suggested by Dreaded Anomaly
Winter is coming. The Words of House Stark
from A Song of Ice and Fire by George R. R. Martin. Suggested by Dreaded Anomaly
It would seem that you have no useful skill or talent whatsoever. Have you thought of going into teaching? Liona Keeble to Death
from Mort by Terry Pratchett. Suggested by Tavi
I’ll tell you, the day someone pulls the plug out of the bottom of the universe, the chain will lead all the way back to Ankh-Morpork and some idiot saying, ‘I just wanted to see what would happen.’ Lu-Tze to Lobsang Ludd
from Thief of Time by Terry Pratchett. Suggested by Tigr
"Witches just aren't like that," said Magrat. "We live in harmony with the great cycles of Nature, and do no harm to anyone, and it's wicked of them to say we don't. We ought to fill their bones with hot lead." Magrat, to Granny Weatherwax and Nanny Ogg
from Wyrd Sisters by Terry Pratchett. Suggested by Tavi
I'm freaking adorable. Especially with the raccoon face I've got going here.
from Small Favor by Jim Butcher. Suggested by Missa Sedai
Peacetime is good for but one thing: practicing skills to be ready for the next war. Your father knew this; you can tell by that wall he built. Woe unto your province if you don't know it as well. Gen. Anborn ap' Gwylliam to Gwydion Navarne
from Requiem for the Sun by Elizabeth Haydon. Suggested by CatherineSedai
Can we focus, here? The world's coming to an end. Harry trying to corral Murphy, Molly, and Morgan.
from Turn Coat by Jim Butcher. Suggested by Missa Sedai
Life? Don't talk to me about life. Marvin the Paranoid Android
from The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy by Douglas Adams. Suggested by moondog
When in doubt, go to the library. Ron, on Hermoine's attitude to life
from Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets by J.K. Rowling. Suggested by Camilla
Never trust anything that can think for itself if you can't see where it keeps its brain. Mrs Weasley
from Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets by J.K. Rowling. Suggested by Camilla
Never forget what you are, for surely the world will not. Make it your strength. Then it can never be your weakness. Armor yourself in it, and it will never be used to hurt you. Tyrion Lannister to Jon Snow
from A Game of Thrones by George R. R. Martin. Suggested by blacktrench210
Stupid. Outlaws don't have tails. Bloody hell, Merret, get hold of yourself. Merret Frey, upon regarding a squirrel
from A Storm of Swords by George RR Martin. Suggested by Stephen
8. You may lie. Final rule in Jonas's training as the Receiver of Memory
from The Giver by Lois Lowry. Suggested by Comet Sedai
Sometimes, everyone is right. Not always and not even usually, but once in a while, everyone is right. Briar Wilkes, speaking of her father's legacy to her son
from Boneshaker by Cherie Priest. Suggested by Phelix
I'm developing a new skill. Irritation by proxy! Lightsong the Bold
from Warbreaker by Brandon Sanderson. Suggested by Darth_Katie
Overrated. It has nice perks, but the hours are awful. Lightsong the Bold, on being a god
from Warbreaker by Brandon Sanderson. Suggested by Darth_Katie
When all else fails, use sexual innuendo. It always brings the focus back where it belongs. Blushweaver the Beautiful
from Warbreaker by Brandon Sanderson. Suggested by Darth_Katie
That, my dear cousin, is the very definition of a friendship. Mutual admiration orbiting mutual contempt. Steven De Selby
from Death Most Definite by Trent Jamieson. Suggested by Phelix
Things always get worse - and then they explode. The new law of the universe, per Steven de Selby
from Death Most Definite by Trent Jamieson. Suggested by Phelix
... Death made tea with all the speed of a man who has no idea of the concept of the word "hurry" or "apocalypse."
from Death Most Definite by Trent Jamieson. Suggested by Phelix
Life before death.
Strength before weakness.
Journey before destination.
Ancient Oath
from The Way of Kings by Brandon Sanderson. Suggested by abby1996
An uneducated, half-brained serving boy with a hangover could make mock of you. I am left with no need to exert myself, and your very nature makes mockery of my mockery. And so it is that through sheer stupidity you make me look incompetent. The King's Wit to Highprince Sadeas
from The Way of Kings by Brandon Sanderson. Suggested by Tavi
Wait! Have you remembered to:
Turn off all experiements?
Feed the beastie?
Taunt the prisoner?
Appease the Dark One?
Lock the gates?
Slay the hero?
Take out the trash?
You may gloat!
Engraved near he exit of the secret lab of Castle Heterodyne
from Girl Genius by Phil & Kaja Foglio. Suggested by Darth_Katie
Come on, Mr. Frodo. I can't carry it for you, but I can carry you! Sam, on the slopes of Mount Doom
from The Return of the King by JRR Tolkien. Suggested by Darth_Katie
I will not say: do not weep, for not all tears are an evil. Gandalf the White, at the Grey Havens
from The Return of the King by JRR Tolkien. Suggested by Darth_Katie
Evil looms. Cowboy up. Kill it. Get paid. Mission statement of Monster Hunter International
from Monster Hunter Vendetta by Larry Correia. Suggested by Tavi
When you're getting chased by a zombie bear, I guess you don't need to be faster than the bear, just faster than your friends. I briefly contemplated shooting Grant in the leg. Owen Zasatava Pitt
from Monster Hunter Vendetta by Larry Correia. Suggested by Tavi
-My attendant will be along any moment... his name is Graumann, and he too suffers from a slight case of being imaginary.

-Merciful Gods, it must be catching!
Locke to Calo, while describing his and Jean's alter egos
from The Lies of Locke Lamora by Scott Lynch. Suggested by Phelix
Fundamentally, every bar is the same as every other one, if it's the kind you're drinking in, to end a sentence with a preposition, which I haven't. Walter Slovotsky
from The Warrior Lives by Joel Rosenberg. Suggested by Joel
It is the curse of leaders to believe they can truly change the world. Brohl Handar
from Malazan Book of the Fallen by Steven Erikson. Suggested by Colonel Logain
This is space. It's sometimes called the final frontier. (Except that of course you can't have a *final* frontier, because there'd be nothing for it to be a frontier *to*, but as frontiers go, it's pretty penultimate...)
from Moving Pictures by Terry Pratchett. Suggested by globug0822
Of course it is happening inside your head, Harry, but why on earth should that mean that it is not real? Albus Dumbledore to Harry Potter
from Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows by J.K. Rowling. Suggested by Mix
My source code is the intellectual property of America Online and its parent company, Quaker Oats Holdings. Todd, to Harry Creek
from The Android's Dream by John Scalzi. Suggested by ranagrande
Men have managed to create a complex and utterly impenetrable secret language consisting monosyllabic sounds and partial words - and they are apparently too thick to realize it exists. Karrin Murphy
from "Aftermath," in Side Jobs, a Dresden Files anthology by Jim Butcher. Suggested by Cannoli
So, therefore, I’m going to steal my wife away from you all and selfishly monopolize her. I’d apologise, but that’s not the sort of thing we barbarians do. Elend Venture to the noble ladies at a ball
from The Hero of Ages: The Final Empire by Brandon Sanderson. Suggested by Kahlee
"I am a shadow, slipping between the cracks of your existence." Jagang to the Sisters of the Dark
from Blood of the Fold by Terry Goodkind. Suggested by FanDraSi
Don't worry. I'm on your side. A violent death is the last thing that will happen to you. Teatime the Assassin to Sideney the Apprentice wizard
from Hogfather by Terry Pratchett. Suggested by Tavi
Give a man a fire, and he's warm him for a day, but set fire to him and he's warm for the rest of his life. Solid Jackson to his son, Les
from Jingo by Terry Pratchett. Suggested by Tavi
Women will forgive anything. Otherwise the race would have died out long ago. Felix Hamilton to Monroe-Alpha Clifford
from Beyond This Horizon by Robert A. Heinlein. Suggested by ranagrande
Molly was committing dinner by that time, aided and abetted by Sanya, who seemed to take some kind of grim Russian delight in watching train wrecks in progress. Harry Dresden
from Small Favor by Jim Butcher. Suggested by Tavi
Error can point the way to truth, while empty-headedness can only lead to more empty-headedness or to a career in politics. Li Kao
from Bridge of Birds by Barry Hughart. Suggested by Camilla
Better to be the failure who nobly strived than the success who never really had to. The Emperor to Dennison
from Firstborn by Brandon Sanderson. Suggested by abby1996
It was strange, how easily and quickly protection could cause destruction... Protect a flower, destroy the pests who wanted to feed on it. Protect a building, destroy the plants that could have gron in the soil. Protect a man. Live with the destruction he creates. Vasher thinking about life
from Warbreaker by Brandon Sanderson. Suggested by abby1996
Every man is a hero in his own story, Princess. Denth talking to Princess Vivenna
from Warbreaker by Brandon Sanderson. Suggested by abby1996
Our names and titles are assigned randomly by a small monkey who has been fed an exceedingly large amount of gin. Lightsong
from Warbreaker by Brandon Sanderson. Suggested by abby1996
Unknowing ignorance is preferable to informed stupidity. Lightsong talking to Queen Siri
from Warbreaker by Brandon Sanderson. Suggested by abby1996
An army that waits is soon an army at war with itself. Kellanved
from House of Chains by Steven Erikson. Suggested by ?
The slower the river, the redder it runs. Nathii saying.
from House of Chains by Steven Erikson. Suggested by ?
Lead us, Warleader. Many to Karsa Orlong
from House of Chains by Steven Erikson. Suggested by ?
Well, I think that when you have ruled out the impossible, what is left, however improbable, ain't worth hanging around on a cold night wonderin' about when you could be getting on the outside of a big drink. Nobby Nobbs
from Maskerade by Terry Pratchett. Suggested by Stephen
The best one I've heard is that it was named after a whore who... Well, let's just say she was imaginative when it came to keeping multiple clients pleased at the same time. Drothe, on how Ten Ways was named
from Among Thieves by Douglas Hulick. Suggested by rebelaessedai
Killing a White Sash was like defecating on an Imperial shrine, only the shrine's buddies didn't get together and hunt you down afterward. Drothe
from Among Thieves by Douglas Hulick. Suggested by rebelaessedai
The things I do for love. Jaime Lannister
from A Game of Thrones by George RR Martin. Suggested by Darth_Katie
In real life, vampires only sparkle when they're on fire. Owen Zastava Pitt
from Monster Hunter Vendetta by Larry Correia. Suggested by Tavi
A war story is a black space. On the one side is before and on the other side is after, and what is inside belongs only to the dead.
Zvonok, domovoy
from Deathless by Catherynne M. Valente. Suggested by Aeryn
And as we watched, the Tsar of Death lifted up his eyelids like skirts and began to dance in the streets of Leningrad.
Zvonok
from Deathless by Catherynne M. Valente. Suggested by Aeryn
That's done it. Damned if I'll be undone by a walking campfire. Lang
from The Door Into Shadow by Diane Duane . Suggested by rebelaessedai
And no one was ill, and everyone was pleased, except those who had to mow the grass. On the happy state of the Shire after the War of the Ring
from The Return of the King by JRR Tolkien. Suggested by Darth_Katie
A reader lives a thousand lives before he dies. The man who never reads lives only one. Jojen Reed
from A Dance with Dragons by George RR Martin. Suggested by Jim
There is no conclusive evidence of life after death. But there is no evidence of any sort against it. Soon enough you will know. So why fret about it? Lazarus Long
from Time Enough For Love by Robert A. Heinlein. Suggested by secretwho
No matter how long you live, a hundred years or fifteen hundred, you'll always find yourself doing something new. Lightning Saker
from Above the Snowline by Steph Swainston. Suggested by Colonel Logain
(The lute) was secondhand, ugly, and had cost me dearly in money, blood, and peace of mind. I loved it like a child, like breathing, like my own right hand. Kvothe
from The Name of the Wind by Patrick Rothfuss. Suggested by CatherineSedai
You get more flies with honey, he'd told her. Yes, she'd replied, but then your enemies expect dessert instead of punishment. Suzong
from Prince of Storms by Kay Kenyon. Suggested by rebelaessedai
Nistothom murmured, "If God exists, it operates without your permission."
Quinn had always known the world would get along fine without him, but he liked hearing that.
from Prince of Storms by Kay Kenyon. Suggested by rebelaessedai
- You know, Plan B doesn't have to be automatically twice as much explosive as Plan A.
- Of course not. Inverse cube law calls for eight times as much.
Aramis and Elke, on the need for more explosives
from Better to Beg Forgiveness by Michael Z Williamson. Suggested by Tavi
No herd of other beasts, gathered together, has so ugly a voice as Man.
from Till We Have Faces by C.S. Lewis. Suggested by ranagrande
Deep in the human unconscious is a pervasive need for a logical universe that makes sense. But the real universe is always one step beyond logic. From "The Sayings of the Muad'Dib" by the Princess Irulan
from Dune by Frank Herbert. Suggested by ranagrande
There's an old saying, Ibram. Keep your friends close, and the brother of the dead hero you replaced as commander closer. Or confined to quarters. Vaynom Blenner to Ibram Gaunt on meeting a new officer
from Salvation's Reach by Dan Abnett. Suggested by Cannoli
WHERE! IS! MY! COW?! Samuel Vimes, Duke of Ankh, in a bloodthirsty rage
from Thud! by Terry Pratchett. Suggested by Darth_Katie
To a woman, forced shopping is probably a subtle form of psychosexual dominance behavior. Adrian Breze, on his sister's treatment of her captive
from A Taint in the Blood by SM Stirling. Suggested by Cannoli
Wanting it doesn't make it so. If it did, we'd all learn to want harder. I can already want quite vigorously, thank you very much. Walter Solvotsky
from The Road Home by Joel Rosenberg. Suggested by Joel
Children do not think about how magnificent it would be to become one with another person. Sieh, god of childhood
from The Kingdom of Gods by N.K. Jemisin. Suggested by rebelaessedai
Ax said approvingly.
"Ax? It's not a hologram," Rachel said.

"Yeah."

Aximili Esgarrouth Isthill, in his first aquarium visit
from Animorphs #15 The Escape by K.A. Applegate. Suggested by Cannoli
All emergency power to engines. Ram the Blade Ship! Jake, in the last words of the series
from Animorphs #54, the Beginning by K.A. Applegate. Suggested by Cannoli
Logic and reason won't work here. My mom's a lawyer. Rachel, preparing to reveal herself to her family
from Animorphs #49 The Diversion by K. A. Applegate. Suggested by Cannoli
Let's do it! Rachel, numerous occasions
from The Animorphs #'s1-53 by K. A. Applegate. Suggested by Cannoli
Prophecy is like a half-trained mule. It looks like it might be useful, but the moment you trust in it, it kicks you in the head. Tyrion Lannister
from A Dance with Dragons by George R.R. Martin. Suggested by Cannoli
Men are dogs. The only difference is they sniff asses with their eyes. Esmenet the prostitute
from The Darkness that Comes Before by R. Scott Bakker. Suggested by Vidarfe
At the age of five, Skagra decided emphatically that God did not exist. This revelation tends to make most people in the universe who have it react in one of two ways – with relief or with despair. Only Skagra responded to it by thinking, Wait a second. That means there’s a situation vacant. The first page
from Doctor Who: Shada by Douglas Adams & Gareth Roberts. Suggested by Mix
- Finally.
- There's been a lot on my mind.
- It seems unlikely that your cares will lighten. Improve your mind.
Queen Mab & Harry Dresden on his belated summons
from Cold Days by Jim Butcher. Suggested by Cannoli
- Wait. You work for me?

- I prefer to think of it as managing your incompetence.
Harry Dresden to his new valet, Cat Sith
from Cold Days by Jim Butcher. Suggested by Cannoli
Laugh whenever you can. Keeps you from killing yourself when things are bad. That and vodka.
Sanya, the agnostic Holy Knight of the Cross
from Changes by Jim Butcher. Suggested by Cannoli
Relax, Harry. I'm not letting anyone lick me, and I'm not looking anyone in the eyes. It's kind of like visiting New York. Susan Rodriguez, attending a vampire's party
from Grave Peril by Jim Butcher. Suggested by Cannoli

Wheel of Time (Back to top)

The Wheel of Time turns, and Ages come and pass, leaving memories that become legend. Legend fades to myth, and even myth is long forgotten when the Age that gave it birth comes again.
So begins every first chapter of the Wheel of Time
from every Wheel of Time novel by Robert Jordan. Suggested by Dragonsworn
Blood and bloody ashes! A lot of people, but mostly Mat
from The Wheel of Time by Robert Jordan. Suggested by ursidae
Beware the fox that makes the ravens fly, for he will marry you and carry you away.
Beware the man who remembers Hawkwing's face, for he will marry you and set you free.
Beware the man of the red hand, for him you will marry and none other.
Foretelling made by damane Lidya to Tuon
from Knife of Dreams by Robert Jordan. Suggested by ursidae
What is already woven cannot be undone.
from Wheel of Time by Robert Jordan. Suggested by Fantasy
We rode on the winds of the rising storm, we ran to the sounds of the thunder.
We danced among the lightening bolts,
And tore the world asunder.
Poem sometimes attributed to the Dragon Reborn.
from Wheel of Time by Robert Jordan. Suggested by Fantasy
You? No! Asmodean's famous last words
from The Fires of Heaven by Robert Jordan. Suggested by BlackAdder
He was better. But he thought I was finished, with only one arm. He never understood. You surrender after you’re dead. Lan
from New Spring by Robert Jordan. Suggested by BlackAdder
One man holding fifty at a narrow passage. Not a bad way to die. Songs have been made about less. Ingtar
from The Great Hunt by Robert Jordan. Suggested by BlackAdder
Asha'man, kill. Mazrim Taim, at Dumai's Wells
from Lord of Chaos by Robert Jordan. Suggested by BlackAdder
Kneel and swear to the Lord Dragon, or you will be knelt. Mazrim Taim, to Aes Sedai after Dumai's Wells
from Lord of Chaos by Robert Jordan. Suggested by BlackAdder
Play 'March of Death'. Play it, unless you know a sadder song. Play something to make your soul weep. If you have one still.
Rand al'Thor, to Asmodean
from The Fires of Heaven by Robert Jordan. Suggested by Dragonsworn
The Wheel of Time and the wheel of a man's life turn alike without pity or mercy. Lews Therin Telamon, to Rand
from Lord of Chaos by Robert Jordan. Suggested by Dragonsworn
A man who trusts everyone is a fool, and a man who trusts no one is a fool. We are all fools if we live long enough.
Lews Therin Telamon, to Rand
from Winter's Heart by Robert Jordan. Suggested by Dragonsworn
What you have is not what you want; what you want is what you cannot have
Lews Therin Telamon. to Rand
from Lord of Chaos by Robert Jordan. Suggested by Dragonsworn
I would not mind you in my head, if you were not so clearly mad.
Lews Therin Telamon, to Rand
from The Path of Daggers by Robert Jordan. Suggested by Dragonsworn
You cannot escape so easily, Dragon. It is not done between us. It will not be done until the end of time. Ishamael, to Lews Therin Telamon
from The Eye of the World by Robert Jordan. Suggested by Dragonsworn
Till shade is gone, till water is gone,
into the Shadow with teeth bared,
screaming defiance with the last breath,
to spit in Sightblinder's eye on the Last Day.
Aiel Oath
from The Wheel of Time by Robert Jordan. Suggested by Dragonsworn
We rode on the winds of the rising storm,
We ran to the sounds of the thunder,
We danced among the lightning bolts,
And tore the world asunder.


Attributed to the Dragon Reborn
from Crossroads of Twilight by Robert Jordan. Suggested by Dragonsworn
My mother always told me the best way to learn to deal with a man was to learn to ride a mule. She said they have about equal brains most of the time. Sometimes the mule is smarter.
Egwene
from The Shadow Rising by Robert Jordan. Suggested by Dragonsworn
Sooner or later there's always trouble when there's two humans together. Elyas Machera
from The Eye of the World by Robert Jordan. Suggested by Dragonsworn
I hope you're not Darkfriends. I don't like killing people after I've fed them. Elyas Machera
from The Eye of the World by Robert Jordan. Suggested by Dragonsworn
I will find the song, or another will find the song, but the song will be sung this year or in a year to come. As it once was, so shall it be again, world without end. Tuatha'an Farewell
from The Eye of the World by Robert Jordan. Suggested by Dragonsworn
He is born again! I feel him! The Dragon takes his first breath on the slope of Dragonmount! He is coming! He is coming! Light help us! Light help the world! He lies in the snow and cries like the thunder! He burns like the sun! Gitara Moroso
from The Great Hunt by Robert Jordan. Suggested by Dragonsworn
Snoop elsewhere. Pevara
from The Wheel Of Time by Robert Jordan. Suggested by damookster
Taking responsibility takes all the joy out of life, and drains a man to dust. Mat Cauthon
from Wheel of Time by Robert Jordan. Suggested by Bergioyn
I have not had anyone to talk to in days, except good Master Gill, and he is busy most of the time. The cook seems to run him unmercifully. Perhaps she really owns the inn? Loial
from Wheel of Time by Robert Jordan. Suggested by Bergioyn
Halt here! Now! By the order of the Lord Dragon! Else he channel your head into your belly and feed you your own feet for breakfast! Mat Cauthon
from Wheel of Time by Robert Jordan. Suggested by Bergioyn
I may be a fool, but I intend to be a live fool. Mat Cauthon
from Wheel of Time by Robert Jordan. Suggested by Bergioyn
I came to bloody rescue you. Burn me if I expected to be greeted as if I had come to steal a pie. Mat Cauthon
from Wheel of Time by Robert Jordan. Suggested by Bergioyn
Narg no hurt.
Narg
from Wheel of Time by Robert Jordan. Suggested by Bergioyn
I do read sometimes. Mat Cauthon
from Wheel of Time by Robert Jordan. Suggested by Ryan
Death is lighter than a feather, duty heavier than a mountain. Saying in Shienar
from The Wheel of Time by Robert Jordan. Suggested by Dragonsworn
I'm only an old gleeman. Who could I possibly be dangerous to? Thom Merrilin
from The Great Hunt by Robert Jordan. Suggested by Dragonsworn
The more women there are about, the softer a wise man steps. saying in Arad Doman
from The Wheel of Time by Robert Jordan. Suggested by Dragonsworn
Fellow couldn't tell me from Hawkwing's toenails. Mat at the Queen's Blessing
from The Dragon Reborn by Robert Jordan. Suggested by BlackAdder
Mother's milk in a cup! Several, but Elayne for example
from The Wheel of Time by Robert Jordan. Suggested by ursidae
At my age, if I make it up, it is still an old saying. Lini
from Wheel of Time by Robert Jordan. Suggested by Dreaded Anomaly
I do not know. But they did not either. That is the trick of it; their minds made up worse than I ever could. I have seen a tough man break when I sent for a basket of figs and some mice. Juilin Sandar, to Nynaeve al'Meara and Elayne Trakand
from Wheel of Time by Robert Jordan. Suggested by General Cyan
Never dance with a girl whose brothers have knife scars. Mat Cauthon
from Wheel of Time by Robert Jordan. Suggested by Mat_Cauthon33
Lead me to this Oosquai. Birgitte to Aviendha
from Winter's Heart by Robert Jordan. Suggested by Mat_Cauthon33
Soon comes the day all shall be free
Even you and even me
Soon comes the day all shall die
Surely you, but never I
Padan Fain
from The Great Hunt by Robert Jordan. Suggested by Tavi
Why should I deny who I am? I am Semirhage! Semirhage to Cadsuane
from Knife of Dreams by Robert Jordan. Suggested by Sidious
He is Lews Therin Telamon reborn, and Lews Therin was as strong as any. Lanfear to the Forsaken
from The Fires of Heaven by Robert Jordan. Suggested by Sidious
I imagine the Amyrlin would summon us if he was reborn. Every Sister, Accepted and novice who could light a candle. With such power that he can wield, we must overwhelm him quickly before he can destroy us and the world. Vandene to Moiraine while discussing the Dragon Reborn
from The Great Hunt by Robert Jordan. Suggested by Sidious
- Women are like mules. Wait. No. Goats. Women are like goats. Except every flaming one thinks she's a horse instead, and a prize racing mare to boot. Do you understand me, Talmanes?

- Pure poetry, Mat.
Mat and Talmanes, discussing women.
from The Gathering Storm by Brandon Sanderson. Suggested by lord-of-shadow
Run, Far Dareis Mai! from Rand al'Thor, to Sulin
from Lord of Chaos by Robert Jordan. Suggested by Great Lord of Chaos
Surprising what you can dig out of books if you read long enough, isn't it? Rand al'Thor
from The Shadow Rising by Robert Jordan. Suggested by Dragonsworn
Lies never make things easier in the long run. Unless they're to exactly the right person - usually a woman - at exactly the right time. When you tell them to yourself, you just bring more trouble. Thom to Mat
from The Gathering Storm by Brandon Sanderson. Suggested by Jim
You're Aes Sedai. I figured you ... You know, Saidared it. Matrim Cauthon to Verin about sketches of Mat and Perrin
from The Gathering Storm by Robert Jordan and Brandon Sade. Suggested by j-whitt987
I'm a gambler, a farmboy, and I'm here to take command of your bloody army. Mat Cauthon
from Wheel of Time by Robert Jordan. Suggested by katie
You wait here - and try not to eat the table. Thom Merrilin to Mat Cauthon
from Wheel of Time by Robert Jordan. Suggested by katie
Always plan for the worst, that way all your surprises will be pleasant ones. Verin Mathwin
from Wheel of Time by Robert Jordan. Suggested by katie
So I believe you've told me. Three or four times so far. I half believe that if I were to peek into your tent at night, I'd find you mumbling it in your sleep. "I'm going to keep bloody gambling! Bloody, bloody gambling and drinking! Where's my bloody drink? Anyone want to gamble for it?" Talmanes refering to Mat
from The Gathering Storm by Robert Jordan and Brandon Sand. Suggested by elennor
It was a compromise they had worked out. Mat put up with Nerim's dismal face and gloomy observations, and let the man fetch, clean and hand him things he could just as easily pick up himself; in return Nerim agreed, reluctantly, not to try actually dressing him.
from Lord of Chaos by Robert Jordan. Suggested by venea
But trust is the colour of a dark seed growing,
trust is the colour of a hearts blood flowing,
trust is the colour of a souls last breath,
trust is the colour of death
Mat thinks it, but it comes from one of his memories
from Wheel of Time by Robert Jordan. Suggested by Kahlee
But trust is the sound of a grave-dog's bark,
trust is the sound of betrayal in the dark,
trust is the sound of a soul's last breath,
trust is the sound of death.
Mat thinks it, but it comes from one of his memories
from The Wheel of Time by Robert Jordan. Suggested by Kahlee
Betray? Gawyn Trakand, that word fits you as darkness fits the sun. Egwene al'Vere
from Wheel of Time by Robert Jordan. Suggested by Terez
Men always believe they are in control of everything around them. When they find out they are not, they think they have failed, instead of learning a simple truth women already know. Aviendha
from Wheel of Time by Robert Jordan. Suggested by Terez
Go away. We don't want your help. Nynaeve, being polite
from A Crown of Swords by Robert Jordan. Suggested by Cannoli
I’m going to keep bloody gambling! Bloody, bloody gambling and drinking! Where’s my bloody drink? Anyone want to gamble for it? Talmanes mocking Mat
from The Wheel of Time: The Gathering Storm by Brandon Sanderson/R. Jordan. Suggested by CatherineSedai
I will never serve you, Father of Lies. In a thousand lives, I never have. I know that. I'm sure of it. Come. It is time to die. Rand to Ba'alzamon at the battle for Falme
from The Great Hunt by Robert Jordan. Suggested by CatherineSedai
You remind me of my uncle... He liked to gamble, too, and he'd much rather have fun than work. He died pulling children out of a burning house. He wouldn't stop going back as long as there was one left inside. Are you like him, Mat? Will you be there when the flames are high? Siuan Sanche to Mat Cauthon after the Healing
from The Dragon Reborn by Robert Jordan. Suggested by CatherineSedai
I always say, if you must mount the gallows, give a jest to the crowd, a coin to the hangman, and make the drop with a smile on your lips. Birgitte Silverbow to Elayne
from The Fires of Heaven by Robert Jordan. Suggested by CatherineSedai
A Myrddraal has less cunning than a woman, and a Trolloc fights with more honor. And a goat has more sense. Gaul to Perrin Aybara
from The Shadow Rising by Robert Jordan. Suggested by Tavi
You are a coward and a tyrant. I'd name you Darkfriend as well, but I suspect that the Dark One himself would be embarrassed to associate with you. Egwene to Elaida
from The Gathering Storm by R Jordan and B Sanderson. Suggested by Darth_Katie
Thus our treaty is written; thus is agreement made.
Thought is the arrow of time; memory never fades.
What was asked is given.
The price is paid.
The inscription on Mat's Ashandarei
from The Shadow Rising by Robert Jordan. Suggested by Darth_Katie
You're Aes Sedai. I figured you... you know, saidared it. Mat Cauthon to Verin Sedai
from The Gathering Storm by Jordan/ Sanderson. Suggested by rebelaessedai

All other literature (Back to top)

Known. Some. Call. Is. Air. Am? Johnny Truant
from House of Leaves by Mark Z Danielewski. Suggested by heartbreak
This is not for you. dedication by Johnny Truant
from House of Leaves by Mark Z Danielewski. Suggested by heartbreak
You were there. dedication
from Only Revolutions by Mark Z Danielewski. Suggested by heartbreak
'Twas brillig and the slithy toves
Did gyre and gimble in the wabe:
All mimsy were the borogroves,
And the mome raths outgrabe.
from The Jabberwocky by Lewis Carroll. Suggested by Rebekah
Nowadays we are all of us so hard up that the only pleasant things to pay are compliments. They're the only things we can pay. Lord Darlington, to Lady Windermere
from Lady Windermere's Fan by Oscar Wilde. Suggested by Camilla
I can resist everything except temptation. Lord Darlington, to Lady Windermere
from Lady Windermere's Fan by Oscar Wilde. Suggested by Camilla
I do not approve of anything that tampers with natural ignorance. Ignorance is like a delicate exotic fruit; touch it and the bloom is gone. Lady Bracknell
from Importance of Being Earnest by Oscar Wilde. Suggested by Camilla
"Darth Vader is a servant of the dark side of the Plot." When Ben Kenobi gets written out, he becomes one with the Plot and can speak inside the hero's head. When a whole planet of good guys gets blown up, Ben senses "a great disturbance in the Plot." Nick Lowe
from The Well-Tempered Plot Device by Nick Lowe. Suggested by Dragonsworn
Surrender now, and we'll spare your goddesses' lives so they can be our slaves and courtesans. Achilles, to the Gods
from Iliad by Homer. Suggested by Nebhead
I told you I was ill! Written, in Irish, on his tombstone.
from His epitaph by Spike Milligan. Suggested by snoopcester
N.B. – Do not attempt to answer more than one question at a time. Test paper
from 1066 and all that. Suggested by snoopcester
(King) William next invented a system according to which everybody had to belong to someone else, and everybody else to the King. This was called the Feutile System, The founding of the fuedal system in England by King William
from 1066 and All That by W.C. Sellars and R.J. Yeatman. Suggested by snoopcester
N.B. – Do not on any account attempt to write on both sides of the paper at once. Test Paper
from 1066 and All That by W. C. Sellar and R. J. Yeatman. Suggested by snoopcester
A Bad Thing:
America was thus clearly top nation, and History came to a .
The end of the book (and history).
from 1066 and All That by W. C. Sellar and R. J. Yeatman. Suggested by snoopcester
I forgot to mention that the lights were buzzing, unevenly, like the snores of a sinus victim. I was sucking her narrow fingers, careful of the sharp nail, thinking of the wolves who bleed to death fron licking the blood-baited knife F.
from Beautiful Losers by Leonard Cohen. Suggested by Ouranid
In the Kamigata area, they have a sort of tiered lunch box they use for a single day when flower viewing. Upon returning, they throw them away, trampling them underfoot. As might be expected, this is one of my recollections of the capital. The end is important in all things.
from Hagakure by Yamamoto Tsunetomo. Suggested by Camilla
If you correlate tool discovery with the species of creature most often found nearby, you would have to conclude that early hand tools were mostly made by antelopes.
from A Short History of Nearly Everything by Bill Bryson. Suggested by Dreaded Anomaly
It is a capital mistake to theorize before you have all the evidence. It biases the judgment. Sherlock Holmes
from A Study in Scarlet by Sir Arthur Conan Doyle. Suggested by snoopcester
It was a cold day in April, and the clocks were striking thirteen. Narrator, opening lines
from 1984 by George Orwell. Suggested by Tavi
We must not look at goblin men,
We must not buy their fruits:
Who knows upon what soil they fed
Their hungry thirsty roots?
from "Goblin Market" by Christina Rossetti. Suggested by Camilla
The English don't like to be killed. Captain Lucas to his cannoneers, battle of Trafalgar
from The Last Cavalier by Alexandre Dumas. Suggested by Camilla
Airplanes! Just a crazy fad. Won't last long. Regular at McGarrity's saloon
from A Tree Grows in Brooklyn by Betty Smith. Suggested by Comet Sedai
I want to hold the way the night is -cold without wind. And the way the stars are so near and shiny. I want to hold all of it tight until it hollers out, "Let me go! Let me go!" Francie Nolan, on New Years Day
from A Tree Grows in Brooklyn by Betty Smith. Suggested by Comet Sedai
But this tree in the yard - this tree that men chopped down ...this tree that they built a bonfire around, trying to burn up its stump - this tree lived! Francie Nolan's farewell
from A Tree Grows in Brooklyn by Betty Smith. Suggested by Comet Sedai
Not in thy fiercest battles hast thou displayed more of thy vaunted courage, than hast been shewn by woman when called upon to suffer for affection and duty. Rebecca to Brian de Bois-Guilbert
from Ivanhoe by Sir Walter Scott. Suggested by Comet Sedai
I envy thee not thy faith, which is ever in thy mouth, but never in thy heart nor in thy practice. Rebecca to Brian de Bois-Guilbert
from Ivanhoe by Sir Walter Scott. Suggested by Comet Sedai
I would endure ten years of captivity to fight for one day by that good knight's side in a quarrel such as this! Ivanhoe to Rebecca, hearing of the mighty Black Knight
from Ivanhoe by Sir Walter Scott. Suggested by Comet Sedai
All children, except one, grow up.
from Peter Pan by J M Barrie. Suggested by Tavi
Did you think to kill me? There's no flesh or blood within this cloak to kill. There's only an idea. Ideas are bulletproof. V
from V for Vendetta by Alan Moore. Suggested by Camilla
Roses are red
Violets are blue
Everything's possible
Nothing is true
V, on a flier
from V for Vendetta by Alan Moore. Suggested by Camilla
O xein', angellein Lakedaimoniois hoti têde

keimetha tois keinon rhémasi peithomenoi.

Tell the Spartans, stranger passing by, that here obedient to their laws we lie.
Epitaph over '300' Spartans grave. Verses by poet Simonides
from Gates of Fire by Steven Pressfield. Suggested by Silence_DoGood
"There is only one thing in the world worse than being talked about, and that is not being talked about." Lord Henry Wotton
from The Picture of Dorian Gray by Oscar Wilde. Suggested by Tavi
I like persons better than principles, and I like persons with no principles better than anything else in the world. Lord Henry Wotton
from The Picture of Dorian Gray by Oscar Wilde. Suggested by Tavi
Philanthropic people lose all sense of humanity. It is their distinguishing characteristic. Lord Henry Wotton
from The Picture of Dorian Gray by Oscar Wilde. Suggested by Tavi
How dreadful! I can stand brute force, but brute reason is quite unbearable. There is something unfair about its use. It is hitting below the intellect. Lord Henry Wotton
from The Picture of Dorian Gray by Oscar Wilde. Suggested by Tavi
Women defend themselves by attacking, just as they attack by sudden and strange surrenders. Narrator
from The Picture of Dorian Gray by Oscar Wilde. Suggested by Tavi
I love acting. It is so much more real than life. Lord Henry Wotton
from The Picture of Dorian Gray by Oscar Wilde. Suggested by Tavi
We live in an age that reads too much to be wise, and that thinks too much to be beautiful. Lord Henry Wotton
from The Picture of Dorian Gray by Oscar Wilde. Suggested by Tavi
"It is perfectly monstrous," he said, at last, "the way people go about nowadays saying things against one behind one's back that are absolutely and entirely true." Lord Henry Wotton
from The Picture of Dorian Gray by Oscar Wilde. Suggested by Tavi
IT IS NOT MY FAULT THAT MY PARENTS OWN THE WORLD'S LARGEST COLLECTION OF BLACK SANTAS. Radar, to Ben and Q
from Paper Towns by John Green. Suggested by LordPerrin
To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance. Lord Goring
from An Ideal Husband by Oscar Wilde. Suggested by joannamacdonald
Zombies hate fast food! Found on a sticker on Myspace
from Myspace bumpersticker app.. Suggested by FanDraSi
It is not my intention to be fulsome, but I confess that I covet your skull. Dr. Mortimer to Sherlock Holmes
from The Hound of the Baskervilles by Arthur Conan Doyle. Suggested by Camilla
While it's asleep the mind can
see, but in the light of day we
have no vision of man's destiny.
Clytaemnestra's ghost addressing the sleeping chorus
from Eumenides by Aeschylus. Suggested by lyringlas
"Sunny day,
Sunny day.
I like hot soup
warm kitten hug.
So no matter what you do
Five- 0
Can't keep a gangsta down."
Bigfoot is writing freestyle poetry
from In Me Own Words: The Autobiography of Bigfoot by Graham Roumieu. Suggested by lyringlas
Hamlet or a dead codfish. The point is immaterial. Percy Gorringe
from Jeeves and the Feudal Spirit by P.G. Wodehouse. Suggested by Camilla
There is one drawback to not wearing a moustache, and that is that if you don't have one, you've got nothing to twirl when baffled. Bertie Wooster
from Jeeves and the Feudal Spirit by P.G. Wodehouse. Suggested by Camilla
People never notice anything.
Holden Caulfield
from The Catcher in the Rye by J. D. Salinger. Suggested by Mix
What really knocks me out is a book, when you're all done reading it, you wished the author that wrote it was a terrific friend of yours and you could call him up on the phone whenever you felt like it. Holden Caulfield
from The Catcher in the Rye by J. D. Salinger. Suggested by Mix
If you had a million years to do it in, you couldn't rub out even half the 'Fuck you' signs in the world. It's impossible. Holden Caulfield
from The Catcher in the Rye by J. D. Salinger. Suggested by Mix
Anyway, I'm sort of glad they've got the atomic bomb invented. If there's ever another war, I'm going to sit right the hell on top of it. I'll volunteer for it, I swear to God I will. Holden Caulfield
from The Catcher in the Rye by J. D. Salinger. Suggested by Mix
A half-read book is a half-finished love affair. Robert Frobisher
from Cloud Atlas by David Mitchell. Suggested by Camilla
Sometimes the fluffy bunny of incredulity zooms round the bend so rapidly that the greyhound of language is left, agog, in the starting cage. Timothy Cavendish
from Cloud Atlas by David Mitchell. Suggested by Camilla
Happy families are all alike; every unhappy family is unhappy in its own way. First sentence of the novel
from Anna Karenina by Leo Tolstoy. Suggested by Darth_Katie
- I knew no one outside of my own party.
- And no one can be introduced in a ballroom.
Mr. Darcy and Elizabeth discussing why he didn't dance
from Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen. Suggested by Phelix
By considering things like how many men the enemy has, time piles up; in the end you will give up.
No matter if the enemy has thousands of men, there is fulfillment in simply standing them off and being determined to cut them all down, starting from one end.
You will finish the greater part of it.
from Hagakure by Yamamoto Tsunetomo. Suggested by Camilla
They've got a couple of old reformers in heaven,
making them go to bed at eleven.
Pack up your sins and go to the devil,
and you'll never have to go to bed at all!
from Pack up your sins and go to the devil by Irving Berlin. Suggested by Camilla
I was raised to be charming, not sincere. Cinderella's Prince
from Into the Woods by Stephen Sondheim. Suggested by Darth_Katie
Because if you're up to your navel in a snowdrift in Ohio, nothing warms your heart like the sight of California on fire. Narrator, describing Christmas Schadenfreude
from The Stupidest Angel by Christopher Moore. Suggested by Tavi
The stars are always in alignment with something.
from Lovecraft is Missing by Larry Latham. Suggested by Darth_Katie
Did the priestess kill herself? They do that sometimes. Fr. Jackey, in the middle of a horrible occult ceremony
from Lovecraft is Missing by Larry Latham. Suggested by Darth_Katie
Anyone can write a credible story in which humans can teleport, travel in time and make themselves invisible. A future in which there are cable compatibility standards, that would be real science fiction.
from The Fry Chronicles by Stephen Fry. Suggested by Camilla
The concept might kindly be described as playful meta-textual post-modernism. Most people, however, were not kind and seemed to regard it as incomprehensible self-indulgent twaddle[.]
from The Fry Chronicles by Stephen Fry. Suggested by Camilla
Shoot all the bluejays you want, if you can hit 'em, but remember it's a sin to kill a mockingbird. Atticus to Jem, about using an air-rifle
from To Kill A Mockingbird by Harper Lee. Suggested by Great Lord of Chaos
I ended up explaining, as kindly as I could, that the English do not want to know your name, or tell you theirs, until a much greater degree of intimacy has been established - like maybe when you marry their daughter. Explaining why you do not introduce yourself to strangers
from Watching the English by Kate Fox. Suggested by Camilla
Happiness is being famous for your financial ability to indulge in every kind of excess Calvin
from Calvin and Hobbes by Bill Watterson. Suggested by Colonel Logain
Philosophy appears to concern itself only with the truth, but perhaps expresses only fantasies, while literature appears to concern itself only with fantasies, but perhaps it expresses the truth. Pereira quoting his uncle, an unsuccessful author.
from Pereira Maintains by Antonio Tabucchi. Suggested by Rebekah
If you want my views on history, then there's something you should know, the three men I admire most are Curly, Larry, and Moe!
from Everything Louder Than Everything Else by Meat Loaf. Suggested by Jedi Wolf Sister
We happy few, we band of brothers
for he today that sheds his blood with me
shall be my brother
from Henry V by William Shakespeare. Suggested by Bergioyn
If letters did not exist, what dark depressions would come over one!
from The Pillow Book by Sei Shonagon. Suggested by Camilla
I'll take a potato chip, and eat it! Light Yagami
from Death Note by Tsugumi Ohba. Suggested by CaptainHammer
For a moment of night we have a glimpse of ourselves and of our world islanded in a stream of stars - pilgrims of mortality, voyaging between horizons across the eternal seas of space and time.
from The Outermost House by Henry Beston. Suggested by Bookwyrm
After all... we're not communists. Don Barzini
from The Godfather by Mario Puzo. Suggested by Cannoli
For hunger or for love they fight or tear,
Whilst wretched man is still in arms for fear.
For fear he arms, and is of arms afraid,
By fear to fear successively betrayed.
from Satyre against Reason and Mankind by John Wilmot, Earl of Rochester. Suggested by Camilla
- Haggis is a brand of diapers. They're good, we used them for our daughter.
- Haggis is a kind of food, too. Although, as far as taste goes, there's probably not much difference.
Anton and Semyon
from Last Watch by Sergei Lukyanenko. Suggested by Tavi
In regard to the humanity of kangaroos, to admit a kangaroo unreservedly to be a man would inevitably involve one in a number of distressing implications, the kangaroolity of women and your wife beside you being one example. The Good Fairy to the Pooka.
from At Swim-Two-Birds by Flann O'Brien. Suggested by Stephen
We are to assume that if an Arab feels joy, if he is sad at the death of his child or parent, if he has a sense of the injustices of political tyranny, then those experiences are necessarily subordinate to the sheer, unadorned, and persistent fact of being an Arab.
from Orientalism by Edward Said. Suggested by Camilla
Good sense is, of all things among men, the most equally distributed; for everyone thinks himself so abundantly provided with it that those even who are the most difficult to satisfy in everything else do not usually desire a larger measure of this quality than they already possess. Opening sentence of the work
from Discourse on the Method by René Descartes. Suggested by Great Lord of Chaos
The best final thought you can have is, "That would have been so awesome if it had worked."

from 10 Traits That Will Come In Handy During The Apocalypse by Seanbaby on Cracked.com. Suggested by Cannoli
Think back to the last dozen times you've listened to a friend vent about their shitty day. Remember how upset they were? They were so close to their breaking point that you were sure even the most minor setback would be the trigger that made them shit into a pillowcase and storm into the office, swinging it at people like a morning star.
John Cheese
from 5 Reasons Today Isn't Going to Suck by Cracked.com. Suggested by TaskmasterJack
It is very well to forgive one's enemies, but one wishes to give them something to forgive also. Etienne Gerard, about Sub-Lieutenant Duroc's quest
from Expolits and Adventures of Brigadier Gerard by Arthur Conan Doyle. Suggested by ranagrande

Movies/TV (Back to top)

Do or do not, there is no try.
Yoda
from Star Wars by George Lucas. Suggested by Bergioyn
They call me Mr Pig! Aaaarrgh! Pumbaa
from The Lion King. Suggested by Rebekah
Well, what you plan and what takes place ain't ever exactly been similar. Jayne Cobb to Captain Malcolm Reynolds
from Firefly by Joss Whedon. Suggested by Deadsy
They want us alive when they eat us. River Tam
from Firefly by Joss Whedon. Suggested by Deadsy
Who's flying this thing? Hoban Washburne
from Firefly by Joss Whedon. Suggested by Deadsy
It's not the tea I object to, it's the water!

Pucci
from Casanova. Suggested by Dragonsworn
EXTERMINATE! Daleks
from Doctor Who. Suggested by Kronin al'Sulc
A census taker once tried to test me. I ate his liver with some fava beans and a nice Chianti. Hannibal Lecter
from Silence of the Lambs. Suggested by Kronin al'Sulc
I'm eleven hundred and twenty years old, just gimme a frickin' beer! Anya, to a bartender at the Bronze
from Buffy The Vampire Slayer by Joss Whedon. Suggested by Yunalesca
These aren't the droids you're looking for. Obi-Wan Kenobi, to Imperial Stormtroopers
from A New Hope by George Lucas. Suggested by Blaine
I find your lack of faith disturbing. Darth Vader, to Admiral Mottin
from A New Hope by George Lucas. Suggested by Blaine
No. I am your Father. Darth Vader, to Luke Skywalker
from The Empire Strikes Back by George Lucas. Suggested by Blaine
Oh my god, they killed Kenny!
from South Park. Suggested by Blaine
The name's Bond. James Bond. Bond, to various scantily-clad women
from James Bond by Ian Fleming. Suggested by Blaine
It's a trap! Admiral Ackbar, at the Battle of Endor
from Return of the Jedi by George Lucas. Suggested by Blaine
Toto, I've got a feeling we're not in Kansas anymore. Dorothy Gale
from The Wizard of Oz. Suggested by Blaine
May the Force be with you
from Star Wars by George Lucas. Suggested by Blaine
There is no spoon. Neo
from The Matrix. Suggested by MightyYT
Go ahead, make my day. Harry Callahan
from Suddden Impact by Joseph C. Stinson. Suggested by Blaine
E.T. phone home.
from E.T. The Extra-Terrestrial by Steven Speilberg. Suggested by Blaine
Mama always said life was like a box of chocolates. You never know what you're gonna get. Forrest Gump, on life
from Forrest Gump by Winston Groom. Suggested by Blaine
Greed, for lack of a better word, is good. Gordon Gekko, concerning his business practices
from Wall Street by Oliver Stone. Suggested by Blaine
If they take the ship, they'll rape us to death, eat our flesh, and sew our skins into their clothing. And if we're very, very lucky, they'll do it in that order. Zoe, about Reavers
from Firefly by Joss Whedon. Suggested by Master Radishes
We got outflanked by the Independent squad, and we're never gonna make it back to our platoon. We need to resort to cannibalism. River Tam, as a child
from Firefly by Joss Whedon. Suggested by Master Radishes
They say the snow on the roof is too heavy. They say the ceiling will cave in. His brains are in terrible danger! River Tam, about Book
from Firefly by Joss Whedon. Suggested by Master Radishes
Also, I can kill you with my brain. River Tam, to Jayne
from Firefly by Joss Whedon. Suggested by Master Radishes
I have misplaced my pants. Homer
from The Simpsons. Suggested by Colonel Logain
I'm pretty sure I can struggle my way out. First I'll just reach in and pull my legs out, now I'll pull my arms out with my face.
Homer
from The Simpsons. Suggested by Colonel Logain
Get away from her, you bitch! Ellen Ripley, to the Alien queen
from Aliens by James Cameron. Suggested by ironclad
Remember Red, hope is a good thing, maybe the best of things, and no good thing ever dies. Andy Dufresne, in a letter to Red
from The Shawshank Redemption by Frank Darabont. Suggested by ironclad
The greatest trick the Devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn't exist. Verbal Kint
from The Usual Suspects by Bryan Singer. Suggested by ironclad
I'm American, honey. Our names don't mean shit. Butch, to female taxi driver
from Pulp Fiction by Quentin Tarantino. Suggested by ironclad
You have to admire its simplicity. It's one billionth our size and it's beating us. Sam Daniels, about viruses
from Outbreak by Wolfgang Petersen. Suggested by ironclad
My wife deserves revenge, whether I know about it or not. Leonard
from Memento by Christopher Nolan. Suggested by ironclad
I am Jack's smirking revenge. Narrator
from Fight Club. Suggested by ironclad
If John Doe's head splits open and a UFO should fly out, I want you to have expected it. Somerset to Mills
from Se7en. Suggested by ironclad
I'm gonna give you a little somethin' you can't take off. Ltd. Aldo Raine
from Inglourious basterds by Quentin Tarantino. Suggested by ironclad
He better be worth it. He better go home and cure a disease, or invent a longer-lasting light bulb. Captain Miller
from Saving Private Ryan by Steven Spielberg (director). Suggested by ironclad
He has urgent business. [Pause] He has gone to London, to have his hair cut.
Emma to Mr Knightley, explaining Frank's absence
from BBC's Emma (2009), based on the novel by Jane Austen. Suggested by Camilla
I do not like Santiago. I've always thought that a leader should have a strong chin. He has no chin. And his vice president has several. This to me is not a good combination. Ivanova, to Sinclair
from Babylon 5 by J. Michael Straczynski. Suggested by Camilla
The Council can go to Hell! And the emergency session can go to Hell! And you, Vir, you can go to Hell, too: I wouldn't want you to feel left out. Londo, to Vir
from Babylon 5 by J. Michael Straczynski. Suggested by Camilla
Mr. Garibaldi, you're sitting at my station, using my equipment. Is there a reason for this, or to save time should I just snap your hand off at the wrist? Ivanova, to Garibaldi
from Babylon 5 by J. Michael Straczynski. Suggested by Camilla
I've got a bad feeling about this... Han Solo
from Star Wars by George Lucas. Suggested by Bergioyn
Looks dead, smells dead, yet it's moving around. That's interesting.
from Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Suggested by Mats Gambling Buddy
It's fuzzy-minded liberal thinking like that that gets you eaten.
from Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Suggested by Mats Gambling Buddy
When I'm around you, Buffy, I find myself needing to know the plural of apocalypse. Riley Finn
from Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Suggested by Mats Gambling Buddy
For a thousand years I wielded the power of the wish. I brought ruin upon the heads of unfaithful men; I offered destruction and chaos for the pleasure of the lower beings. I was feared and worshipped across the mortal globe and now I'm stuck at Sunnydale High. A mortal! A child! And I'm flunking math! Anya
from Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Suggested by Mats Gambling Buddy
There's more than one way to skin a cat. And I happen to know that factually that's true. Mayor Wilkins
from Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Suggested by Mats Gambling Buddy
I knew it! I knew it! Well, not in the sense of having the slightest idea, but I knew there was something I didn't know. Willow
from Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Suggested by Mats Gambling Buddy
Yes, and you were very nearly devoured by a giant demon snake. The words 'Let that be a lesson' are a tad redundant at this juncture. Giles
from Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Suggested by Mats Gambling Buddy
What do you want, you moon faced assassin of joy? Londo to Vir, on being called out of bed for a conference
from Babylon 5 by J. Michael Straczynski. Suggested by Camilla
Don't. You're too young to experience that much pain. Ivanova, blocking the way of an obnoxious reporter
from Babylon 5 by J. Michael Straczynski. Suggested by Camilla
If your hand touches metal, I swear by my pretty floral bonnet I will end you. Capt. Malcolm Reynolds
from Firefly by Joss Whedon. Suggested by Kronin al'Sulc
My name is Gladiator. Maximus to Commodus
from Gladiator by Ridley Scott. Suggested by Fantasy
I lied. Ben Linus
from Lost. Suggested by Deadsy
As far as vampires go, you're pretty cuddly. Cordelia to Angel
from Angel. Suggested by MightyYT
It's a perfectly natural bodily function that happens when I'm nervous ... or angry! Dominar Rygel the XVI to D'Argo
from Farscape. Suggested by MightyYT
It's going to be Legen - Wait for it. And I hope you're not lactose intolerant because the last word of this sentence is DARY! Barney Stinson, to Ted Mosby
from How I Met Your Mother. Suggested by MightyYT
Bite my shiny metal ass! Bender
from Futurama. Suggested by MightyYT
All this has happened before and all this will happen again.
from Battlestar Galactica. Suggested by zodiac2000
- I wish the Ring had never come to me. I wish none of this had happened.
- So do all who live to see such times, but that is not for them to decide. All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us.
Frodo to Gandalf
from Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring. Suggested by zodiac2000
Comfy? I'm chained in a bathtub, drinking pig's blood from a novelty mug. Doesn't rate huge in the Zagat's guide. Spike
from Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Suggested by zodiac2000
Fly, you fools! Gandalf
from Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring. Suggested by zodiac2000
- Lister, last time I only failed by the narrowest of narrow margins.
- You what? You went in there, wrote "I AM A FISH" four hundred times, did a funny little dance and fainted!
Lister and Rimmer discuss Rimmer's failed exam
from Red Dwarf by Rob Grant and Doug Naylor.. Suggested by snoopcester
I am Holly, the ship's computer, with an IQ of 6000; the same IQ as 6000 PE teachers. Holly, the ship's computer
from Red Dwarf by Rob Grant and Doug Naylor.. Suggested by snoopcester
- Jean-Paul Sartre said Hell was being locked forever in a room with your friends.
- Holly, all his mates were French!
Holly and Lister discuss Satre
from Red Dwarf by Rob Grant and Doug Naylor.. Suggested by snoopcester
Arnold Rimmer, Technician, 2nd Class. Captain's remarks: "There's a saying amongst the officers: If a job's worth doing, it's worth doing well. If it's not worth doing, give it to Rimmer." Holly, on Rimmer
from Red Dwarf by Rob Grant and Doug Naylor.. Suggested by snoopcester
Hey, this has been a really good day. I've eaten five times, I've slept six times, and I've made a lot of things mine. Tomorrow, I'm gonna see if I can't have sex with something. Cat, on being Cat
from Red Dwarf by Rob Grant and Doug Naylor.. Suggested by snoopcester
You'd never get a cat to be a servant. You ever see a cat return a stick? "Hey, man! You threw the stick, you go get it yourself! I'm busy! If you wanted the stick so bad, why'd you throw it away in the first place?" Cat
from Red Dwarf by Rob Grant and Doug Naylor.. Suggested by snoopcester
6? Do me a lemon! That's a poor IQ for a glass of water! Holly after being insulted about his temporarily reduced IQ
from Red Dwarf by Rob Grant and Doug Naylor.. Suggested by snoopcester
Oh, spin my nipple nuts and send me to Alaska! Kryten
from Red Dwarf by Rob Grant and Doug Naylor.. Suggested by snoopcester
Smoke me a kipper, I'll be back for breakfast. Ace Rimmer
from Red Dwarf by Rob Grant and Doug Naylor.. Suggested by snoopcester
Just a wild stab in the dark, which incidentally is what you'll be getting if you don't start being a bit more helpful. Blackadder, to a young crone
from Blackadder II by Richard Curtis and Ben Elton. Suggested by snoopcester
- Have you got a plan, my lord?
- Yes I have, and it's so cunning you can brush your teeth with it.
Blackadder, plotting
from Blackadder II by Richard Curtis and Ben Elton. Suggested by snoopcester
A man may fight for many things: his country, his principles, his friends, the glistening tear on the cheek of a golden child... But personally, I'd mud wrestle my own mother for a wad of cash, an amusing clock and a sack of French porn! Blackadder
from Blackadder II by Richard Curtis and Ben Elton. Suggested by snoopcester
- Baldrick, I have a very, very, very cunning plan.
- Is it as cunning as a fox what used to be Professor of Cunning at Oxford University but has moved on, and is now working for the UN at the High Commission of International Cunning Planning?
Blackadder, plotting
from Blackadder Back & Forth by Richard Curtis and Ben Elton. Suggested by snoopcester
Oh, I'm sorry sir. I'm inuspeptic, frasmotic, even compunctious to have caused you such pericumbobulations. Blackadder, to Dr Samuel Johnson
from Blackadder by Richard Curtis and Ben Elton. Suggested by snoopcester
I'm as happy as a Frenchman who has just invented a pair of self-removing trousers. Prince George
from Blackadder by Richard Curtis and Ben Elton. Suggested by snoopcester
Edmund. A Butler's Tale. A huge, roller coaster of a novel in four hundred sizzling chapters. A searing indictment of domestic servitude in the eighteenth century, with some hot gypsies thrown in. Blackadder's Novel
from Blackadder by Richard Curtis and Ben Elton. Suggested by snoopcester
This is my Timey-wimey-detector. Goes ding when there's stuff. And it can fry an egg at twenty paces. Whether you want it to or not, actually. It's... I've learned to stay away from hens. It's not pretty when they blow... The Doctor, explaining a contraption
from Doctor Who by Stephen Moffat. Suggested by Camilla
Sleep is for tortoises! The Doctor
from Doctor Who by Robert Holmes. Suggested by Camilla
Any number that reduces to 1 when you take the sum of the square of its digits and continually reiterate until it yields 1 is a happy number, any number that doesn't isn't, a happy prime is a number that's both happy and prime, now type it in! I don't know, talk about dumbing down. Don't they teach recreational mathematics anymore? The Doctor, explaining happy primes
from Doctor Who by Chris Chibnall. Suggested by Camilla
Your tiny little human brains. How do you get around in those things? The Doctor, to Rose and Captain Jack
from Doctor Who by Stephen Moffat. Suggested by Camilla
Crossing into established events is strictly forbidden. Except for cheap tricks. The Doctor, to Martha, after proving timetravel
from Doctor Who by Russell T. Davies. Suggested by Camilla
Only one Human captain has ever survived battle with a Minbari fleet. He is behind me. You are in front of me. If you value your lives, be somewhere else. Delenn
from Babylon 5 by J. Michael Straczynski. Suggested by Camilla
You have the emotional maturity of a blueberry scone. Giles, to Wesley
from Buffy the Vampire Slayer by Joss Whedon. Suggested by Dreaded Anomaly
To read makes our speaking English good. Xander
from Buffy the Vampire Slayer by Joss Whedon. Suggested by Dreaded Anomaly
I've been accused of a great many things in my time, but paranoid has never been one of them. Unless people have been saying it behind my back... Wesley
from Angel by Joss Whedon. Suggested by Dreaded Anomaly
It's 106 miles to Chicago, we've got a full tank of gas, half a pack of cigarettes, it's dark, and we're wearing sunglasses. Elwood Blues
from The Blues Brothers by Dan Aykroyd. Suggested by Dreaded Anomaly
Rock, paper, scissors, lizard, Spock. It's very simple. Look -- scissors cuts paper, paper covers rock, rock crushes lizard, lizard poisons Spock, Spock smashes scissors, scissors decapitates lizard, lizard eats paper, paper disproves Spock, Spock vaporizes rock, and as it always has, rock crushes scissors. Dr Sheldon Cooper
from The Big Bang Theory. Suggested by KaitLynn
We have to take in nourishment, expel waste, and inhale enough oxygen to keep our cells from dying. Everything else is optional. Dr Sheldon Cooper
from The Big Bang Theory. Suggested by KaitLynn
Obviously you're not well-suited for three-dimensional chess. Perhaps three-dimensional Candyland would be your speed. Dr Sheldon Cooper
from The Big Bang Theory. Suggested by KaitLynn
Engineering — where the semi-skilled laborers execute the vision of those who think and dream. Hello Oompa-Loompas of science. Dr Sheldon Cooper
from The Big Bang Theory. Suggested by KaitLynn
Yes! Well, I'm polymerized tree sap and you're an inorganic adhesive, so whatever verbal projectile you launch in my direction is reflected off of me, returns on its original trajectory and adheres to you. Dr Sheldon Cooper
from The Big Bang Theory. Suggested by KaitLynn
Renaissance fairs aren't about historical accuracy. They're about taking chubby girls who work at Kinko's and lacing them up in corsets so tight their bosom jumps out and say "Howdy." Howard Wolowitz
from The Big Bang Theory. Suggested by KaitLynn
That's no moon. It's a space station. Obi-Wan "Ben" Kenobi
from Star Wars by George Lucas. Suggested by Colonel Logain
The avalanche has already started. It is too late for the pebbles to vote. Kosh
from Babylon 5 by J. Michael Straczynski. Suggested by Camilla
Heart attacks and strokes; that's the CIA. Jerry Fletcher to himself, theorising about strange deaths.
from Conspiracy Theory by Richard Donner. Suggested by General Cyan
Because you're not quite evil enough. ... You're semi-evil. You're quasi-evil. You're the margarine of evil. You're the Diet Coke of evil, just one calorie, not evil enough.
Dr. Evil to Scott Evil. Both are in the Jerry Springer Show.
from Austin Powers: The Spy Who ... by Dir. Jay Roach. Suggested by Bookwyrm
No boom today. Boom tomorrow. There's always a boom tomorrow. What? Look, somebody has got to have some damn perspective around here. Boom. Sooner or later. BOOM! Ivanova, displaying Russian attitude
from Babylon 5 by J. Michael Straczynski. Suggested by Camilla
Some people juggle geese! Hoban Washburne
from Firefly by Joss Whedon. Suggested by Corwin
I say we take off and nuke the entire site from orbit, it's the only way to be sure. Ellen Ripley, in refrence to the colony on LV 426
from Aliens by James Cameron. Suggested by The Secret Lurker
Game over man! Game over! Private Hudson about the situation the squad was in.
from Aliens by James Cameron. Suggested by The Secret Lurker
It is in your nature to destroy yourselves. The Terminator to a teenage John Connor
from Terminator 2: Judgement Day by James Cameron. Suggested by The Secret Lurker
We are dreamers, shapers, singers, makers. Elric, technomage
from Babylon 5. Suggested by Camilla
The True Secrets, the important things. Fourteen words to make someone fall in love with you forever, seven words to make them go without pain. How to say goodbye to a friend who is dying. How to be poor, how to be rich. How to rediscover dreams when the world has stolen them from you. Elric, the technomage, when asked what they know
from Babylon 5. Suggested by Camilla
If you are going to kill me, then do so. Otherwise I have considerable work to do. Lennier
from Babylon 5. Suggested by Camilla
If the primates that we came from had known that some day politicians would come out of the gene pool, they'd have stayed up in the trees and written evolution off as a bad idea. Sheridan
from Babylon 5. Suggested by Camilla
We are starstuff. We are the Universe made manifest, trying to figure itself out. Delenn
from Babylon 5. Suggested by Camilla
I swallowed a bug. River Tam
from Firefly by Joss Whedon. Suggested by Mat Girl
The eyes are the groin of the head. Dwight, to documentary crew.
from The Office. Suggested by Hieshyn
I, for one, welcome our new insect overlords. Kent Brockman said it thinking giant space ants was atacking
from Deep Space Homer, The Simpsons by David Mirkin, writer. Suggested by Milla
A day will come at sea when you'll smell land and there'll be no land, and on that day, Ahab will go to his grave, but he'll rise again, and beckon, and all save one shall follow. Elijah's prophecy
from Moby Dick by Herman Melville. Suggested by Dragonsworn
Yippie kai yay, motherfucker! John McClane
from Each of the four Die Hard movies at one point or another. Suggested by Tom
I love the smell of napalm in the morning! ... It smells like victory. Lt. Col. Kilgore to Captain Willard
from Apocalypse Now. Suggested by Tom
Charlie don't surf! Lt. Col. Kilgore to his men in 1/9 Air Cav
from Apocalypse Now. Suggested by Tom
If wishes were horses, we'd all be eating steak! Jayne Cobb
from Firefly by Joss Whedon. Suggested by entyti
What is the value of suffering if it isn't to be enjoyed? Roger Collins
from Dark Shadows. Suggested by Sophy
Each individual reserves the right to ruin his or her own life as quietly or as flamboyantly as he chooses. Roger Collins
from Dark Shadows. Suggested by Sophy
-We would destroy the Cybermen with one Dalek. You are superior in only one respect.
-What is that?
-You are better at dying!
Conversation between Dalek Sek and Cyber Leader
from Doctor Who by Russel T. Davies. Suggested by jh
I promise. I will never die. Gary to Lisa
from Team America: World Police by Trey Parker and Matt Stone. Suggested by MightyYT
I'm so ronery. Kim Jong Il
from Team America: World Police by Trey Parker and Matt Stone. Suggested by MightyYT
Hans Brix! Oh No! Kim Jong Il
from Team America: World Police by Trey Parker and Matt Stone. Suggested by MightyYT
Durka, Durka. Mohammed. Jihad. Gary Johnston to some terrorists
from Team America: World Police by Trey Parker and Matt Stone. Suggested by MightyYT
I'm not even supposed to be here, today! Dante Hicks, several times
from Clerks by Kevin Smith. Suggested by MightyYT
Would you believe Chuck Norris with a BB gun? Maxwell Smart
from Get Smart. Suggested by MightyYT
Want to see a magic trick? The Joker to the mob
from The Dark Knight. Suggested by MightyYT
Well, you see Bob, it's not that I am lazy. It's that I just don't care. Peter Gibbons to the Consultants
from Office Space by Mike Juge. Suggested by MightyYT
Kitty! The little girl Boo
from Monster's Inc. Suggested by MightyYT
I was going to listen to it, but I just got on with my life. Aldous Snow to Matthew the Waiter
from Forgetting Sarah Marshall by Jason Segel. Suggested by MightyYT
You have balls. I like balls. Chechnyan terrorist to Gary Johnston
from Team America: World Police by Trey Parker and Matt Stone. Suggested by MightyYT
Well, somebody's got to save our skins! Princess Leia of course! To Han and Luke ...
from Star Wars: A New Hope by George Lucas. Suggested by Murtach74
Just because a person is gay, mayor, doesn't mean he is a fag. Kyle Brofloski to the Mayor
from South Park: The F Word. Suggested by MightyYT
Capital V. And there is something you should know 'bout me. I have no problem spanking men. Angel to a random Bad Dude
from Angel. Suggested by MightyYT
You think that's air you're breathing? Morpheus to Neo, teaching the rules of the Matrix
from The Matrix by Larry and Andy Wachowski. Suggested by ElanMorin
Ah! Curse your sudden but inevitable betrayal! Wash, playing with the dinosaurs
from Firefly by Joss Whedon. Suggested by Mat Girl
Soon, the whole world will be Silky Smooth! Zohan
from You Don't Mess With the Zohan. Suggested by MightyYT
Never send a human to do a machine's job. Agent Smith
from The Matrix by The Wachowski Brothers. Suggested by Tavi
The French never care what they do, actually, as long as they pronounce it properly. Professor Higgins, lamenting the state of English
from My Fair Lady by Alan Jay Lerner. Suggested by Camilla
I need about tree fifdy. Chef's Dad quoting the Locke Ness Monster
from South Park: Succubus by Trey Parker and Matt Stone. Suggested by MightyYT
When I am sad, I just stop being sad and be awesome instead. Barney Stinson
from How I Met Your Mother. Suggested by MightyYT
There are no stupid questions, just stupid people Mr. Garisson to the 3rd Grade Class
from South Park by Trey Parker and Matt Stone. Suggested by MightyYT
Ted, the universe clearly doesn't want you and Robin together. Now don't piss off the universe. The universe will slap you. Barney Stinson to Ted Mosby
from How I Met Your Mother. Suggested by MightyYT
- So, the hypochondriac's back. What is it this time?
- Well, my lead pipe hurts a little.
- That's normal. Next patient.
Dr. Zoidberg and Fry
from Futurama: Parasites Lost. Suggested by MightyYT
I'll take you out for a meal with Mr and Mrs. Pain. Order up some violent quiche. Howard Moon
from The Mighty Boosh. Suggested by snoopcester
Goth Juice... the most powerful hairspray known to man. Made from the tears of Robert Smith. Vince Noir
from The Mighty Boosh. Suggested by snoopcester
The Boosh is loose and it's coming at you like a shark with knees!
from The Mighty Boosh. Suggested by snoopcester
- I do many things. I span the genres - they call me the genre spanner.

- Yeah, they call you the spanner...
Howard Moon and Vince Noir
from The Mighty Boosh. Suggested by snoopcester
I have a problem. It's to do with the little man, the squashed-in French man, the naked little squashed up hairy boy! You know! With the hand feet. The brown little hand foot man. Bob Fossil trying to remember the word "gorilla"
from The Mighty Boosh. Suggested by snoopcester
Science teachers and the mentally ill, that’s all Jazz is for. Vince Noir
from The Mighty Boosh. Suggested by snoopcester
- Hey Howard, what will your last words be?
- I'll probably just do some poetry. What will yours be?
- I'll probably just swear my tits off.
Howard Moon and Vince Noir
from The Mighty Boosh. Suggested by snoopcester
I’m a crazy man. I’m a nutjob. I’m a freakball. You know? I break through all boundaries. If I see a boundary, I eat a boundary. And wash it down with a cup of hot steaming rules. Eh? Howard Moon
from The Mighty Boosh. Suggested by snoopcester
- I’m a ragamuffin from the streets!
- You’re a French duke, if ever I saw one. You lie around in hammocks all day, eating soft cheese.
Vince Noir and Howard Moon
from The Mighty Boosh. Suggested by snoopcester
YES!! Howard Moon, I rain down the pain, I’m Monsoon Moon, I’m coming atcha like a beam, like a ray, like a laser, don’t try and stop me I’m quick. Like lightning. I’m frightening. Oowww! Chika-chika! Yeah? You want a piece of me now? You got nothing! Howard Moon
from The Mighty Boosh. Suggested by snoopcester
- We can't all be models. Can't be in a band, Vince. Some people have to do real jobs. What do you think happens to stocky short people with wide backs?

- I don't know. Do they lie down to sad music and die like the Elephant Man?
Howard Moon and Vince Noir
from The Mighty Boosh. Suggested by snoopcester
Yeah....thats not the film I meant to show...thats the film for the night-time, for me and the night-times, for the fuzzy tingle times! The Crack Fox
from The Mighty Boosh. Suggested by snoopcester
How many times do I have to tell you, reading leads to pure, liquid evil - it makes you smoke things! Bob Fossil
from The Mighty Boosh. Suggested by snoopcester
Three things in life where you don't go cheap... sushi, surgery, submarines. Emily Patterson
from The Triangle (TV miniseries). Suggested by aragornital
DO YOU GET ME? Sergeant Zim, to everybody
from Starship Troopers. Suggested by AlexTimperley
Don't you dare use the word party as a verb in this shop! Bernard Black
from Black Books. Suggested by Camilla
Enjoy. It's dreadful, but it's quite short. Bernard Black, on selling a book
from Black Books. Suggested by Camilla
I'm about to stop playing 'Who shall I kill first' in my head and just go for what feels natural. Bernard Black
from Black Books. Suggested by Camilla
I don't know. It's an impossible choice - walls, thermometers. I'll just have to hope when I flip the coin it somehow explodes and kills me. Bernard Black
from Black Books. Suggested by Camilla
We said we wouldn't talk about Canada! Bernard Black
from Black Books. Suggested by Camilla
I wish you good fortune in whatever avenue of life you assault with your presence. Bernard Black
from Black Books. Suggested by Camilla
You can leave in a taxi. If you can't get a taxi, you can leave in a huff. If that's too soon, you can leave in a minute and a huff. Groucho Marx
from Duck Soup. Suggested by Burr
I wish God was alive to see this. Homer Simpson
from The Simpsons. Suggested by rebelaessedai
Friendship is more lasting than love, and more legal than stalking. Jane
from Coupling. Suggested by Sophy
We're in the stickiest situation since Sticky the Stick Insect got stuck on a sticky bun. Captain Edmund Blackadder
from Blackadder Goes Forth - Major Star by Richard Curtis and Ben Elton. Suggested by Mark
What part of, "I'm a genius," aren't you getting? Nicola Tesla to Dr. Helen Magnus
from Sanctuary. Suggested by MightyYT
The guy who invented radio just dissed Jack the Ripper. Will Zimmerman
from Sanctuary. Suggested by MightyYT
You took what was supposed to be a symphony and turned it into Rock'n'Roll. French-Canadian Rock'n'Roll! Nicola Tesla to his vampiric creations
from Sanctuary. Suggested by MightyYT
Your aunt is a very lucky woman, Angelica. She has two lives: the life she is living, and the book she is writing. Vanessa Bell, about Virginia Woolf
from The Hours. Suggested by cabbage
The past belongs to us, and we can change it. Miss Falewicz
from Be Kind Rewind. Suggested by cabbage
If this is our destiny, then that was his, and if there are no explanations for us, let there be none for him. Guildenstern, after stabbing The Player
from Rosencrantz & Guildenstern Are Dead. Suggested by cabbage
It doesn't matter whether you're selling Jesus or Buddha or civil rights or 'How to Make Money in Real Estate With No Money Down.' [...] Because as soon as you lay your hands on a conversation to steer it, it's not a conversation anymore; it's a pitch. And you're not a human being; you're a marketing rep. Phil Cooper
from The Big Kahuna. Suggested by cabbage
There's a family with kids. Do the kids and make the mother watch. Tell her you'll stop if she can hold back her tears. I owe her that. Grace
from Dogville. Suggested by cabbage
Young boys should never be sent to bed... they always wake up a day older. J.M. Barrie
from Finding Neverland. Suggested by cabbage
I know. You know I know. I know you know I know. We know Henry knows, and Henry knows we know it. We're a knowledgeable family. Prince Geoffrey to Eleanor of Acquitaine
from The Lion in Winter (1968) by Director: Anthony Harvey. Suggested by Comet Sedai
I've snapped and plotted all my life. There's no other way to be alive, king, and fifty all at once. Henry II
from The Lion in Winter (1968) by Director: Anthony Harvey. Suggested by Comet Sedai
There's no sense asking if the air is good if there's nothing else to breathe.
Henry II
from The Lion in Winter (1968) by Director: Anthony Harvey. Suggested by Comet Sedai
You are not in Kansas anymore. You are on Pandora, ladies and gentleman. Col. Quaritch
from Avatar by James Cameron. Suggested by Bergioyn
You are like a baby! Clumsy! Loud!
Neytiri, to Jake Sully
from Avatar by James Cameron. Suggested by Bergioyn
Colonel, there's a native doing the funky chicken.
Bulldozer pilot, to Col. Quaritch
from Avatar by James Cameron. Suggested by Bergioyn
Find out what those blue monkeys want.
Selfridge
from Avatar by James Cameron. Suggested by Bergioyn
Engage. Jean-Luc Picard
from Star Trek The Next Generation by Gene Roddenberry. Suggested by j-whitt987
Resistance is futile. The Borg
from Star Trek by Gene Roddenberry. Suggested by j-whitt987
Undergraduates talking to each other, I expect. I've tried to have it banned. Prof. Chronotis, on inhuman voices the Doctor heard.
from "Shada", Doctor Who, series 17 (unaired) by Douglas Adams. Suggested by Camilla
It was the Buddha. He is unavailable. Seth to Jack Bruno
from Race to Witch Mountain. Suggested by MightyYT
The School of Rock? And we shall teach Rock and Roll to the world! Dewey Finn
from School of Rock by Jack Black. Suggested by AgentOrange
Will you kiss me? I like to be kissed before someone is doing sex to me. Chinese President to Barack Obama
from SNL skit. Suggested by AgentOrange
All I see is pork swords. Juno McGuff
from Juno. Suggested by AgentOrange
- What the fuck was that?
- Chartreuse baby, the only liqueur so good they named a color after it.
Warren to Jungle Julia
from Death Proof by Quentin Tarantino. Suggested by AgentOrange
Wormhole weapons do not make peace. Wormhole weapons do not even make war. They make total destruction, annihilation, Armageddon. People make peace. John Crichton, showing what ultimate destruction looks like
from Farscape, The Peacekeeper Wars. Suggested by Artsapat
Keep your hands off my momma. Keep your hands off my Doritos. Little Boy to Mom's Date
from Doritos Superbowl Commercial. Suggested by MightyYT
Hell has no fury like the vast robot armies of a woman scorned. Walt, Mom's oldest son
from Futurama, "Mother's Day". Suggested by Artsapat
The Babylon Project was our last, best hope for peace. It failed. But in the year of the Shadow War, it became something greater: our last, best hope…for victory. The year is 2260. The place, Babylon 5. Susan Ivanova: opening credits voiceover
from Babylon 5 by J. Michael Straczynski. Suggested by Artsapat
- I feel as if I am being nibbled to death by... What are they called?
Earth creature, with feathers, a yellow beak, goes 'quack'?
- Cats.
- Ah, yes. I feel as though I am being nibbled to death by cats.
Londo to Vir
from Babylon 5 by J. Michael Strazynski. Suggested by Artsapat
Hello kiddies, here's a message from your uncle Billy; don't buy drugs... become a rock star and they give you them for free! Billy Mack's christmas advice to the children of England
from Love Actually by Richard Curtis. Suggested by Yunalesca
If I had wanted schooling I'd have gone to school. Jayne Cobb
from Firefly by Joss Whedon. Suggested by Camilla
- What do you fear, my lady?
- A cage. To stay behind bars until use and old age accept them and all chance of valor has gone beyond recall or desire
Aragorn to Eowyn before they leave for Helms Deep
from The Lord of the Rings: Two Towers. Suggested by Handoin
Bad Horse! Bad Horse! Bad Horse! Bad Horse! He rides across the nation, the Thoroughbred of Sin! He got the application that you just sent in! It needs evaluation, so let the games begin! A heinous crime, a show of force, a murder would be nice, of course! Cowboys singing a letter Dr. Horrible is reading.
from Dr. Horrible's Sing-a-long Blog by Joss Whedon. Suggested by MightyYT
- You people had a therapist?
- It's very stressful being an Other, Jack.
Jack & Juliet, on their encounter with Harper
from Lost ep4.06 "The Other Woman". Suggested by Cannoli
Did I fall asleep? Echo
from Dollhouse by Joss Whedon. Suggested by globug0822
Nothing is what it appears to be. First Line
from Dollhouse by Joss Whedon. Suggested by globug0822
I don't want to use the word genius, but I'd be ok if you wanted to. Topher Brink
from Dollhouse by Joss Whedon. Suggested by globug0822
A lot of guys ignore the laugh, and that's about standards. I mean, if you're gonna get into the Evil League of Evil, you have to have a memorable laugh. What, do you think Bad Horse didn't work on his whinny? His terrible death-whinny?
from Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog by Joss Whedon. Suggested by globug0822
You need anything dampened, or made soggy? Moist to Dr. Horrible
from Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog by Joss Whedon. Suggested by globug0822
Double the Crichton, and you double the waste of time. Dominar Rygel XVI
from Farscape. Suggested by globug0822
Ah, screw it. But I am not Kirk, Spock, Luke, Buck, Flash or Arthur frelling Dent. I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas. John Crichton
from Farscape. Suggested by globug0822
Sarcasm, the hallmark of the subeducated. Sikozu
from Farscape. Suggested by globug0822
Bill Gates can't guarantee Windows. How can you guarantee my safety? John Crichton
from Farscape. Suggested by globug0822
I wish, I wish, I hadn't killed that fish. Homer Simpson
from The Simpsons, Treehouse of Horror V by Matt Groening. Suggested by Bergioyn
Faster! Faster! Faster would be better! Mal to Zoe, followed by Reavers
from Serenity by Joss Whedon. Suggested by Camilla
People shouldn't fear their government, governments should fear their people. V to Evey Hammond
from V for Vendetta (film) by Wachowski Bros. Suggested by SilverWarder
No girl wants to marry a doctor who can't tell if a man's dead or not! Sherlock Holmes, to Dr. Watson
from Sherlock Holmes (2009) by Guy Ritchie. Suggested by Darth_Katie
- It was almost the perfect crime, but you forgot one thing: Rock breaks scissors. But paper covers rock, and scissors cut paper! Kiff, we have a conundrum.

[Kiff groans]

- Search them for paper... and bring me a rock.
Zap Brannigan arrests Leela for possesion of scissors
from Futurama by Matt Groening. Suggested by jiggy
There's nothing like a nice piece of hickory. The Preacher
from Pale Rider. Suggested by Wibble
There's something that doesn't make sense ... Let's go and poke it with a stick. The Doctor, to Amy and Rory
from Amy's Choice; Doctor Who by Simon Nye. Suggested by Darth_Katie
This may be hard for you to believe, but there is no conspiracy. Nobody is in charge. It's a headless blunder operating under the illusion of a master plan. Can you grasp that? Big Brother is not watching you. Worth to Quentin and Holloway
from Cube by Vincenzo Natali. Suggested by soilent brad
An apple a day keeps the ... no, never mind. The Doctor
from "Kinda", Doctor Who. Suggested by Camilla
I don't advise a haircut, man. All hairdressers are in the employment of the government. Hairs are your aerials. They pick up signals from the cosmos, and transmit them directly into the brain. This is the reason bald-headed men are uptight. Danny
from Withnail and I. Suggested by Stephen
We want the finest wines available to humanity. And we want them here, and we want them now! Withnail
from Withnail and I by Bruce Robinson. Suggested by Stephen
If there's one thing I can't stand, it's an unpunctual alien attack. The Doctor
from Vincent and The Doctor by Richard Curtis. Suggested by Darth_Katie
Is this how time normally passes? Really slowly, in the right order. The Doctor, waiting rather impatiently
from Vincent and The Doctor by Richard Curtis. Suggested by Darth_Katie
The East Coast was American enough for
Al-Qaeda so it should be American enough for Sarah Palin.
Re: Palin saying the Midwest is the "real America"
from The Daily Show by Jon Stewart. Suggested by lyringlas
Why didn't I leave after the cricket? The Doctor, trapped.
from "Black Orchid", Doctor Who. Suggested by Camilla
In the game of chess you can never let your adversary see your pieces. Zap Brannigan to Kif Kroker
from Futurama: "Love's Labours Lost in Space". Suggested by jiggy
It's a trap! You have to imagine me with a giant squid head. It's a trap! It's a trap! Dr Sheldon Cooper, imitating Admiral Ackbar from Star Wars
from The Big Bang Theory "The Dead Hooker Juxtaposition" by Steven Molaro, Mark Cendrowski. Suggested by soilent brad
You're Scottish. Fry something! The Doctor, to Amelia Pond
from "The Eleventh Hour", Doctor Who. Suggested by Camilla
Chloe, I'm getting real tired of your personality. Tony Almeida to Chloe O'Brian
from 24, Day 3.. Suggested by jiggy
If there is no great glorious end to all this, if nothing we do matters, then all that matters is what we do. Angel, to Kate Lockley
from Angel. Suggested by Dreaded Anomaly
- Look, I gotta get out of here before I end up like you.
- What? Handsome with a great sexual prowess?
John Crichton and Dominar Rygel XVI
from Farscape. Suggested by Dreaded Anomaly
She was like a sniper, aiming with precision
Firing bollux for ammunition
A nine minute beat poem called 'Storm'
from 'Are you ready for this?' by Tim Minchin. Suggested by SilverWarder
Or alternatively, the greatest work of fiction since vows of fidelity were included in the French marriage service. Blackadder refering to the latest issue of "King & Country"
from Black Adder Goes Forth by Richard Curtis and Ben Elton. Suggested by Mix
- Where are we?
- Geographically speaking,in the
Northern Hemisphere. Socially, on the margins and, narratively, with some way to go.
Tony to Percy
from The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassu by T Gilliam & C McKeown. Suggested by Mix
Give my regards to St Peter... or whoever does his job... but in hell. Captain Hammer to Dr. Horrible
from Dr. Horrible's Sing-a-long Blog by Joss Whedon. Suggested by jiggy
There was a goblin, or a trickster ... Or a warrior ... A nameless, terrible thing, soaked in the blood of a billion galaxies. The most feared being in all the cosmos. And nothing could stop it or hold it, or reason with it. One day it would just drop out of the sky and tear down your world. The Doctor, on what's inside the Pandorica
from The Pandorica Opens by Stephen Moffat. Suggested by Darth_Katie
The universe is big; it's vast and complicated and ridiculous. And sometimes, very rarely, impossible things just happen and we call them miracles. And that's the theory. Nine hundred years, never seen one yet, but this would do me. The Doctor, to Rory
from The Pandorica Opens by Stephen Moffat. Suggested by Darth_Katie
Make it so, Number One. Jean-Luc Picard
from from Star Trek The Next Generation by Gene Roddenberry. Suggested by Dreaded Anomaly
Betty White is my nemesis and one day I will fight her in a ball of fire. It will be a glorious battle. We will wrestle live on Pay-Per-View. Tina Fey, on the identity of her personal nemesis
from Megamind Panel at San Diego Comicon 2010. Suggested by Darth_Katie
You know what you are? You're a beard with an idiot hanging off it. Bernard Black
from Black Books. Suggested by Mix
Enjoy. It's dreadful, but quite short. Bernard Black while selling a book
from Black Books. Suggested by Mix
What's a Jedi warrior? Bob Wilton (who is played by Ewan McGregor AKA Obi-Wan)
from The Men Who Stare at Goats by Peter Straughan. Suggested by Mix
It wasn't the Dim Mak that was killing Lyn. And it wasn't the cancer. He was dying of a broken heart. And maybe, the cancer as well. Bob Wilton
from The Men Who Stare at Goats by Peter Straughan. Suggested by Mix
As we ran for cover, I thought this was what I wanted. I was on a mission, even if I didn't know what kind of mission it was. But I could hear the little man inside me again. He was screaming like a little girl. Bob Wilton
from The Men Who Stare at Goats by Peter Straughan. Suggested by Mix
Well. Isn't that somethin'? I knew you let her kiss you. Mal to Inara regarding Saffron.
from Firefly by Joss Whedon. Suggested by Mats Gambling Buddy
- Sir, we don't want to deal with Patience again.
- Why not?
- She shot you.
- Well, yeah, she did a bit.
Zoe to Mal
from Firefly by Joss Whedon. Suggested by Mats Gambling Buddy
Everyone's always in favour of saving Hitler's brain. But when you put it in the body of a Great White shark, ooh, suddenly you've gone too far! Prof Farnsworth, "A Clone of my own"
from Futurama by Matt Groening. Suggested by Yunalesca
No matter how cleverly you sneak up on a mirror, your reflection always looks you straight in the eye. Louis Cyphre
from Angel Heart (1987). Suggested by Darth_Katie
I may be love's bitch, but at least I'm man enough to admit it. Spike, to Buffy and Angel
from Buffy the Vampire Slayer by Joss Whedon. Suggested by Darth_Katie
Edith, if this plan fails, there will not be a wall in Nuvion big enough to shoot us all against. René, to his wife
from 'Allo 'Allo! by David Croft and Jeremy Lloyd. Suggested by Bergioyn
I was pissing by the door, when I heard two shats. You are holding in your hand a smoking goon; you are clearly the guilty potty. Officer Crabtree to Captain Hans Geering
from 'Allo 'Allo! by David Croft and Jeremy Lloyd. Suggested by Bergioyn
We will stick out like a carrot in an omelet. René
from 'Allo 'Allo! by David Croft and Jeremy Lloyd. Suggested by Bergioyn
- I was God once.
- Yes, I know. You were doing well, until everyone died.
- Bender and God
from Futurama. Suggested by Phelix
Fat chance! You can't count on God for jack! He pretty much told me himself! Bender, about God and divine intervention
from Futurama. Suggested by Phelix
- You called my thesis a fat sack of crap and then stole it?
- Welcome to Academia.
Amy to the hyper intelligent Mr. Katz
from Futurama. Suggested by Phelix
More good women have been lost to marriage than to war, famine, disease and disaster. Cruella De Vil
from 101 Dalmatians. Suggested by Camilla
You call yourselves men. Hah! I've seen more intelligent pieces of carpet! Cruella De Vil
from 101 Dalmatians. Suggested by Camilla
Saying "sorry" is for people who are weak and wrong. Not me.

....

Have I not made my opinion on apologizing clear? It is for the weak and wrong!
King Julien, on apologizing.
from Penguins of Madagascar. Suggested by Phelix
Human beings are a disease, a cancer of this planet. You are a plague, and we are the cure. Agent Smith, to Morpheus
from The Matrix by The Wachowski Brothers. Suggested by Darth_Katie
It's hard to work in groups when you're omnipotent. Q to Data, in regards to human social interactions
from Star Trek: The Next Generation. Suggested by Phelix
I'll get to sleep the deep sleep of a father whose daughters aren't out getting impregnated. Mr Stratford
from 10 Things I hate about you. Suggested by Phelix
All my life I thought I was crazy, that I had ghosts in my head or something... simply because I could hear music. Of course, I didn't know it was music. All I knew was that it was something... beautiful and... and painful and right. And I was the only one who could hear it. Lorne the Host:
from Angel: Over the Rainbow. Suggested by Mix
No power in the 'verse can stop me. River Tam
from Firefly by Joss Whedon. Suggested by Dreaded Anomaly
I know something of a woman in a man's profession. Yes, by God, I do know about that. Queen Elizabeth I
from Shakespeare in Love (1998). Suggested by Darth_Katie
Have you ever tried going mad without power? It's boring. No one listens to you. EPA Executive
from The Simpsons Movie. Suggested by Phelix
We might not be a traditional family like the Murphys next door, or the Lesbian coven across the street.... Fry, in regard to the Planet Express Company
from Futurama. Suggested by Phelix
Books smell. Musty and rich. The knowledge gained from a computer is ... it has no texture, no context. It's there and then it's gone. If it's to last then the getting of knowledge should be tangible, it should be smelly. Giles to Miss Callendar, on books vs computers
from "I, Robot ... you, Jane", Buffy The Vampire Slayer by Joss Whedon. Suggested by Camilla
I just think it's rather odd that a nation that prides itself on its virility should feel compelled to strap on 40 pounds of protective gear just in order to play rugby. Giles
from "Some Assembly Required", Buffy by Joss Whedon. Suggested by Camilla
- Cut her down.
- The girl's a witch!
- Yeah, but she's our witch. *cocks gun* So cut her the hell down.
Mal to the town Patron with River about to be burned alive.
from Firefly by Joss Whedon. Suggested by Mats Gambling Buddy
Xander, don't speak Latin in front of the books. Rupert Giles
from "Superstar", Buffy the Vampire Slayer by Joss Whedon. Suggested by Camilla
Darling facist bullyboy,

Give me some more money, you bastard.
May the seed of your loin be fruitful in the belly of your woman

Neil.
Neil's letter to the bank manager.
from The Young Ones by Ben Elton and Rik Mayall. Suggested by Stephen
I never drive faster than I can see.
- Jack Burton
Driving a semi in a rainstorm, at night, wearing sunglasses.
from Big Trouble in Little China. Suggested by HyogaRott
My own mother thought I was a monster... She was right, of course, but it still hurt! Princess Azula
from Avatar: The Last Airbender. Suggested by Jedi Wolf Sister
Three wars back we called Sauerkraut "liberty cabbage" and we called liberty cabbage "super slaw" and back then a suitcase was known as a "Swedish lunch box." Of course, nobody knew that but me. Abe Simpson
from The Simpsons. Suggested by Mix
As Mr. Sloan always says, there is no "I" in team, but there is an "I" in pie. And there's an "I" in meat pie. Anagram of meat is team... I don't know what he's talking about. Shaun
from Shaun of the Dead by Simon Pegg, Edgar Wr. Suggested by Mix
I suppose if I am honest I, erm, I use my penis as a sort of car substitute. Stephen Fry
from A Bit of Fry and Laurie by Steven Fry and Hugh Laurie. Suggested by Mix
Secret vices? I don't know. Rather too fond of chocolate Hob Nobs. My wife tells me I overdo the heroin. Otherwise, not really. Stephen Fry
from A Bit of Fry and Laurie by Steven Fry and Hugh Laurie. Suggested by Mix
And then my bereavement counsellor died. I didn't know who to turn to. Hugh Laurie
from A Bit of Fry and Laurie by Steven Fry and Hugh Laurie. Suggested by Mix
I don't know much about pornography. But I know what I like. Hugh Laurie
from A Bit of Fry and Laurie by Steven Fry and Hugh Laurie. Suggested by Mix
Screw the rules, I have money! Seto Kaiba
from Yu-gi-oh: The Abridged Series by Little Kuriboh. Suggested by CaptainHammer
Hey everyone! Look at me! I’m Seto Kaiba! I have a dragon fetish and I sound like Brock from Pokemon! Screw the rules, I’m in love with Nurse Joy! Yami to Seta Kaiba
from Yu-gi-oh: The Abridged Series by Little Kuriboh. Suggested by CaptainHammer
God help us. We're in the hands of engineers. Ian Malcolm, beginning the tour of the park
from Jurassic Park. Suggested by Camilla
Pants are an illusion. And so is death. Hu the Swamp-Bender
from Avatar: The Last Airbender. Suggested by Darth_Katie
- I sponsor a Water Buffalo in Indonesia.

- And you wouldn't get in the way of its decisions?

- I wouldn't get in its way, period.
Sweets giving advice to Cam
from Bones. Suggested by MightyYT
Dobby did not mean to kill, only maim, or seriously injure! Dobby to Bellatrix Lestrange
from Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 1 (Movie) by Steve Kloves (screenplay). Suggested by Mix
Take my advice and go back to the time you came from. The future is not what it used to be. G'Kar
from "The Long Dark", Babylon 5. Suggested by Camilla
I'd like to live just long enough to be there when they cut off your head and stick it on a pike as a warning to the next ten generations that some favours come with too high a price. I would look up at your lifeless eyes and wave like this [waves]. Can you and your associates arrange that for me, Mr Morden? Vir Coto, replying to the question "What do you want?".
from "In the Shadow of Z'ha'dum", Babylon 5. Suggested by Camilla
I'm gonna go crazy, and I'm taking you with me. Vala to Daniel, about spending 3 months on the Odyssey
from Stargate SG-1 by Robert C. Cooper. Suggested by j-whitt987
Shut up! Shut up! You're hostages. This is like a-a life-and-death situation here. Start acting like it. Dr. Daniel Jackson to hysterical women being held hostage
from Stargate SG-1 by Martin Gero. Suggested by j-whitt987
- Are you conducting some sort of scientific experiment, O'Neill?
- Hey, come one, that salsa's still good.
Teal'c while looking in O'Neill's refrigerator
from Stargate SG-1 by Damian Kindler. Suggested by j-whitt987
- I am Her'ak.

- Congratulations. Failing upwards I see.
Her'ak and Colonel Jack O'Neill on Abydos
from Stargate SG-1 by Robert C. Cooper. Suggested by j-whitt987
Lose it... It means go crazy, nuts, insane, bonzo, no longer in possession of ones faculties, three fries short of a Happy Meal, wacko! Jack O'Neill to Teal'c
from Stargate SG-1 by Joseph Mallozzi & Paul Mullie. Suggested by j-whitt987
- As long as I am in command of the SGC, we will hold ourself to the highest ethical standard.

- And when the Goa'uld wipe us out because we have nothing with which to defend ourselves, I'm sure we'll all feel *great* about ourselves and our high moral standard.
General Hammond and O'Neill about Jack stealing from alies
from Stargate SG-1 by Jonathan Glassner. Suggested by j-whitt987
For all we know you could be her evil twin. But then we'd be dealing with clichés, and you know how I feel about those. No, actually, *you* know how I feel about those. Jack O'Neill to an alternate universe Sam Carter
from Stargate SG-1 by Jonathan Glassner& Brad Wright. Suggested by j-whitt987
Seriously, who would make this shit up? Daniel when being interrogated about the Stargate program
from Stargate Continuum by Brad Wright. Suggested by j-whitt987
Oh for cryin' out loud. She prob'ly just went to the bathroom. I'm next in line, by the way. Jack O'Neill discussing Vala's disappearance
from Stargate Continuum by Brad Wright. Suggested by j-whitt987
In the name of people, and freedom, and democracy, and stuff like that, I hereby kidnap myself, and I'm taking this ship with me. Whoo! Zaphod
from The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy by Douglas Adams. Suggested by CaptainHammer
When others do a foolish thing, you should tell them it is a foolish thing. They can still continue to do it, but at least the truth is where it needs to be. Dukhat
from "Atonement", Babylon 5. Suggested by Camilla
It rubs the lotion on its skin. It does this whenever it's told. It rubs the lotion on its skin or else it gets the hose again. Jame "Buffalo Bill" Gumb to Catherine Martin
from Silence of the Lambs by Directed by Jonathan Demme. Suggested by everynametaken
One thing about living in Santa Carla I never could stomach... All the damn vampires. Grandpa
from The Lost Boys. Suggested by Jedi Wolf Sister
You're a creature of the night, Micheal, just like out of a comic book. You're a vampire Micheal. My own brother, a god damned shit suckin vampire! Oh, you wait till Mom finds out, buddy! Sam
from The Lost Boys. Suggested by Jedi Wolf Sister
Bazinga! Dr Sheldon Cooper, on multiple occasions
from The Big Bang Theory. Suggested by Great Lord of Chaos
Every once in a while, just to keep them guessing, I stick a cigar in my ear. Denny Crane
from "A Greater Good", Boston Legal. Suggested by Camilla
Some men aren't looking for anything logical.
They can't be bought, bullied, reasoned, or negotiated with.
Some men just want to watch the world burn.
Alfred, Bruce Wayne's Butler
from The Dark Knight by Christopher Nolan. Suggested by Bergioyn
P.M.S. Avenger. I only work four days a month. Is there a problem with that? P.M.S. Avenger at superhero tryouts
from Mystery Men. Suggested by Bookwyrm
He punched the highlights out of her hair! Young Neil cradling unconscious Knives Chau
from Scott Pilgrim vs. the World. Suggested by Bookwyrm
No, I don't like you. I think you're a fake cop. If you were in the wild, I would attack you. If I were a lion and you were a tuna, I would swim out in the middle of the ocean and eat you. Terry Holtz (Mark Wahlberg) to Allen Gamble (Will Ferrell)
from The Other Guys. Suggested by Bookwyrm
No soup for you! The Soup Nazi
from Seinfeld. Suggested by Bookwyrm
- What kind of archaeologist carries a weapon?
- Uh, I do.
- Bad example.
Jack O'Neill and Daniel Jackson
from "Window of Opportunity", Stargate SG-1 . Suggested by Bookwyrm
Indeed. Teal'c in every episode
from Stargate SG-1. Suggested by Bookwyrm
- You ever heard of the Goa'uld "Nut"?

- As in… cashew? Pea? Oh you mean Egyptian sky goddess.
Vala Mal Doran & Daniel Jackson
from Avalon Part 1, Stargate SG-1. Suggested by Bookwyrm
Neil, is it really necessary to nail the plates to the table? What happens when we want to play Monopoly? Go directly to "plate"? Do not pass "plate nailed to the table by a stupid hippie"? Vivian - to Neil
from The Young Ones. Suggested by moondog
Machines don't fix themselves, sir! Spoor
from Brazil (the movie). Suggested by moondog
Fool! You fell victim to one of the classic blunders! The most famous of which is "Never get involved in a land war in Asia". But only slightly less well known is this: Never go in against a Sicilian when death is on the line! Vizzini to the Dread Pirate Roberts
from The Princess Bride. Suggested by moondog
Let me explain - No, there is too much. Let me sum up... Inigo to Westley
from The Princess Bride. Suggested by moondog
Probably just some local fisherman, out for a pleasure cruise at night, through eel-infested waters... Vizzini
from The Princess Bride. Suggested by moondog
Have fun storming the castle! Miracle Max
from The Princess Bride. Suggested by moondog
I haven't fought just one person for so long. I've been specializing in groups - battling gangs for local charities, that kind of thing. Fezzik to the Dread Pirate Roberts
from The Princess Bride. Suggested by moondog
There is a shortage of perfect breasts in the world. It would be a pity to damage yours. Westley to Buttercup
from The Princess Bride. Suggested by moondog
Leave the gun...take the cannoli. Clemenza advising Lampone after whacking Paulie
from The Godfather by Mario Puzo. Suggested by Cannoli
Barzini is dead. So is Phillip Tattallgia. Moe Green. Slacci. Cuneo. Today I settled all family business... Michael Corleone
from The Godfather by Mario Puzo. Suggested by Cannoli
Leaders tumble. Legends fall. The crowd jumps to its feet with a roar. Then we start over. Flavin
from Gene Roddenberry's Andromeda. Suggested by Bookwyrm
Size matters not. Look at me. Judge me by my size, do you? Hmm? Hmm. And well you should not. For my ally is the Force, and a powerful ally it is. Yoda to Luke
from Star Wars V: The Empire Strikes Back by George Lucas. Suggested by Scott Blademaster
Your father's lightsaber. This is the weapon of a Jedi Knight. Not as random or as clumsy as a blaster, but an elegant weapon for a more civilized age.
Obi Wan Kenobi to Luke
from Star Wars IV: A New Hope by George Lucas. Suggested by Scott Blademaster
Authority should derive from the consent of the governed, not from the threat of force! Barbie, standing against tyranny
from Toy Story 3. Suggested by Darth_Katie
Anta baka?
Askua Langley Soryu to Shinji Ikari a lot
from Neon Genesis Evangelion by Hideki Anno. Suggested by Yunalesca
If you take sexual advantage of her, you're going to burn in a very special level of hell. A level they reserve for child molesters and people who talk at the theater. — Shepherd Book to Mal
from Firefly- Our Mrs. Reynolds. Suggested by globug0822
Of course I do. We're somewhere else. I'll get back to you on the details. Pilot, when asked to where Moya has Starburst.
from Farscape. Suggested by MightyYT
It is useless to resist us. Capt. Kirk, to the Halkan Council; "assimilated" by the Borg
from "Mirror, Mirror", Star Trek TOS by Jerome Bixby. Suggested by Joel
-You're pregnant?!
-Interesting? Is there anything there about Orthotics?
Leonard and Amy (who is conducting an experiment in gossip)
from The Big Bang Theory. Suggested by MightyYT
One day...you will all work for me. Kurt, to the kids who are bullying him
from Glee, S1E2: Showmance. Suggested by MightyYT
Don't you get it? It's not just them. We live in Ohio. Not New York, or San Fransisco, or some other city where people eat vegetables that aren't fried. Finn asking Kurt to not be so "out"
from Glee, S1E20: Theatricality. Suggested by MightyYT
- The tree that doesn’t bend, breaks, Cedric.
- Bend too far, you’re already broken.
Marla & Cedric Daniels
from The Wire; final episode by David Simon. Suggested by Cannoli
These are people of the land. The common clay of the new West. You know... morons. Jim to Sherriff Bart
from Blazing Saddles by Mel Brooks. Suggested by Tavi
It's a MADHOUSE! A MADHOUSE! Taylor whilst being hosed down by an Ape
from The Planet of the Apes. Suggested by Wibble
Take your stinking paws off me, you damned dirty ape. Taylor speaks the first words from man to Ape
from The Planet of the Apes. Suggested by Wibble
- This is so weird. I dressed up as him for Halloween.
- Me too.
Castle and Beckett after meeting Gene Simmons of KISS
from Castle - Season 3: To Love and Die in LA. Suggested by MightyYT
Tickets? Since when did they start charging for the bus? Didn't we used to ride that shit to school every morning for free? Jay to Silent Bob
from Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back by Kevin Smith. Suggested by Mix
What the fuck is The Internet? Jay
from Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back by Kevin Smith. Suggested by Mix
- Stop the movie? What are you, crazy?
- All these assholes on the Internet are calling us names because of this stupid fucking movie.
- That's what the Internet is for. Slandering others anonymously.
Banky and Jay
from Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back by Kevin Smith. Suggested by Mix
This job would be great if it wasn't for the fucking customers. Randal Graves
from Clerks by Kevin Smith. Suggested by Mix
You know, there's a million fine-looking women in the world, but they don't all bring you lasagna at work. Most of them just cheat on you. Silent Bob
from Clerks by Kevin Smith. Suggested by Mix
Who would be friends with me? I hate everyone and everything seems stupid to me. Randal Graves
from Clerks II by Kevin Smith. Suggested by Mix
At Bible Camp, we made a flow chart. Since God created man, and man created the Transformers, the Transformers are like a gift from God, Randal! Elias to Randal
from Clerks II by Kevin Smith. Suggested by Mix
So you were an artist? Big deal. Elvis was an artist, but that didn't stop him from joining the service in time of war. That's why he's the King, and you're a schmuck. Serendipity
from Dogma by Kevin Smith. Suggested by Mix
I repeat: this is not a drill. This is the Apocalypse. Please exit the hospital in an orderly fashion. PA announcer at hospital
from Dogma by Kevin Smith. Suggested by Mix
That guy's faster than Walt Flanigan's Dog! Jay
from Mallrats by Kevin Smith. Suggested by Mix
- Was he talking about what I think he was talking about?
- If you mean time-travelling bunnies, then yes.
Locke to Ben Linus, watching a Dharma video
from Lost, season 4, episode 13. Suggested by Milla
... every human life is just another story by the same author. Ivan
from Being Human by Toby Whithouse. Suggested by Mix
No fair! You changed the outcome by measuring it! Prof Farnsworth, at a sporting event
from Futurama. Suggested by Darth_Katie
That'll do pig, that'll do. Farmer Hogget, to Babe
from Babe. Suggested by Stephen
They call me Mr Tibbs. Virgil Tibbs
from In the Heat of the Night. by Norman Jewison (Director). Suggested by Stephen
To alcohol; the cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems. Homer
from The Simpsons. Suggested by Stephen
Do you know what the chain of command is? It's the chain I go get and beat you with until you understand who's in ruttin' command here! Jayne
from Firefly by Joss Whedon. Suggested by Tavi
- Were I unwed I would take you in a manly fashion.
- Because I'm pretty?
- Because you're pretty.
Wash comforting Kaylee
from Firefly by Joss Whedon. Suggested by globug0822
Print is dead. Egon Spengler
from Ghostbusters. Suggested by Tom
Have you tried turning it off and on again? Roy, to various callers
from The IT Crowd by Graham Linehan . Suggested by Great Lord of Chaos
- [singing] We don't need no education.
- Yes you do. You've just used a double negative.
Roy and Moss, referring to the Pink Floyd song
from The IT Crowd by Graham Linehan . Suggested by Great Lord of Chaos
You may have hoodwinked everyone else in this backwater town, but you can't fool me. I listen to public radio. Squidward to Plankton
from The Spongebob Squarepants Movie. Suggested by Darth_Katie
- Are all people like this?
- Like what?
- So much bigger on the inside.
Idris and the Doctor
from The Doctor's Wife by Neil Gaiman. Suggested by Darth_Katie
Logic, my dear Zoe, merely enables one to be wrong with authority. The Doctor
from "The Wheel in Space", Doctor Who. Suggested by Camilla
I can run away from anything I like. Time is not the boss of me! The Doctor
from The Time of Angels by Stephen Moffat. Suggested by Darth_Katie
I don't have to be careful! I've got a gun! Homer Simpson
from The Simpsons by All those Simpson writer-guys. Suggested by Cannoli
You clearly don’t know who you’re talking to, so let me clue you in. I am not in danger, Skylar, I AM the danger. A guy opens his door and gets shot, you think that of me? No. I am the one who knocks! Walter White
from Breaking Bad. Suggested by Cannoli
So in effect, this is not a humiliating defeat at all, but a rare species of victory? Cato when a retreat is explained in positive terms
from Rome. Suggested by Cannoli
He was a consul of Rome! Julius Caesar upon being presented with his enemy's head
from Rome. Suggested by Cannoli
Nonsense! Roman men are never scared. He's just sad to be leaving his mommy. Atia defending her son's manliness upon his departure
from Rome. Suggested by Cannoli
For the record, I do have genitals. They're functional and aesthetically pleasing. Sheldon
from The Big Bang Theory. Suggested by rebelaessedai
- Why are you crying?
- Because I'm stupid!
- That's no reason to cry. One cries because one is sad. For example, I cry because others are stupid, and that makes me sad.
Sheldon and Penny
from The Big Bang Theory. Suggested by rebelaessedai
All I need is a healthy ovum and I can grow my own Leonard Nimoy! Sheldon
from The Big Bang Theory. Suggested by rebelaessedai
I am the ball. Its thoughts are my thoughts; its holes are my holes. Sheldon
from The Big Bang Theory. Suggested by rebelaessedai
Lana! Krenshaw's a mole! Definitely Russian! Possibly a Jew! Thoughts? Archer
from Archer. Suggested by rebelaessedai
Mine always said, "Sterling, come in here and check me for lumps." Holy shit, was that out loud? Archer, about his mother.
from Archer. Suggested by rebelaessedai
There's your bomber: Beardsley McTurbanhead. Archer
from Archer. Suggested by rebelaessedai
- Don't you want a grandkid?
- Well, if I did I'd just scrape all your previous mishaps into a big pile and knit a onesie for it.
Archer and Malory
from Archer. Suggested by rebelaessedai
- A record? Good lord, man, have you never heard of downloads?
- Said Winston Churchill.
Winston Churchill and the Doctor
from The Wedding of River Song by The Wedding of River Song. Suggested by Mix
Rule one: The doctor lies. River Song
from Doctor Who. Suggested by Mix
Bow ties are cool The Doctor
from Doctor Who. Suggested by Mix
There's something you better understand about me, 'cause it's important and one day your life may depend on it. I am definitely a madman with a box! The Doctor
from Doctor Who. Suggested by Mix
Poisoned me, but I'm fine ... well, no. I'm dying. But I've got a plan. The Doctor
from Doctor Who. Suggested by Mix
Okay. Okay, I’m trapped inside a giant robot replica of my wife. I’m really trying not to see this as a metaphor. Rory
from Doctor Who. Suggested by Mix
Pantophobia. Not fear of pants, though, if that's what you're thinking. It's the fear of everything. Including pants, I suppose, in that case. The Doctor
from Doctor Who. Suggested by Mix
Come on, Rory, this is hardly rocket science, this is quantum physics! The Doctor
from Doctor Who. Suggested by Mix
OK, this is bad. At the moment I don’t know how bad, but certainly we're three buses, a long walk, and eight quid in a taxi from good. The Doctor
from Doctor Who. Suggested by Mix
- I don't think you're as evil as you pretend to be, Queen Selina.
- Ah ha! But I am!
Princess Zandra to Queen Selina of Temekula
from Warriors of the Wind (aka Nausika and the Valley of the WInd. Suggested by Cannoli
I'm not evil. I'm nuanced.
Kevin Levin
from Ben 10: Ultimate Alien. Suggested by TaskmasterJack
- My first girlfriend turned into the moon.
- That's rough, buddy.
Sokka to Good-Zuko, on a warballoon
from Avatar: The Last Airbender (TV). Suggested by LadyLorraine
All citizens, be aware that the vassal prince, Herod, Tetrarch of Galilee, has come to the city. By order of the Triumvirate, during his residence here, all mockery of Jews and their One God shall be kept to an appropriate minimum. The Newscrier
from Rome. Suggested by Cannoli
I was on my way to this gay, gypsy, bar mitzvah for the disabled when I suddenly thought "Gosh, the Third Reich's a bit rubbish, I think I'll kill The Fuhrer." River Song
from Doctor Who by Steven Moffat. Suggested by Mix
Hey, yo lesson here, Bey… you come at the king, you best not miss! Omar Little, taunting his would-be killer
from The Wire by David Simon & Edward Burns. Suggested by Cannoli
You’d rather live in shit, than let the world see you work a shovel. Daniels on his superiors’ caving to political pressure
from The Wire by David Simon & Edward Burns. Suggested by Cannoli
What the fuck did I do? Jimmy McNulty, on multiple occasions
from The Wire by David Simon & Edward Burns. Suggested by Cannoli
All the pieces matter. Lester Freamon
from The Wire by David Simon & Edward Burns. Suggested by Cannoli
- I mean, don’t get it twisted, I do some dirt too, but I ain’t ever put my gun on nobody who wasn’t in the Game.
- A man must have a code.
- Oh, no doubt!
Omar and Bunk
from The Wire by David Simon & Edward Burns. Suggested by Cannoli
- How is it you got so much wisdom about who should be where?
- A good churchman is always up in everybody’s shit. That’s how we do.
Dennis "Cutty" Wise & Deacon Melvin
from The Wire by David Simon & Edward Burns. Suggested by Cannoli
- Is there a word for total screaming genius that sounds modest and a tiny bit sexy?
- Doctor. You call me the Doctor.
- I see what you did there.
Oswin and the Doctor
from Doctor Who: Asylum of the Daleks by Steven Moffat. Suggested by Mix
- State your name, rank and intention.
- The Doctor. Doctor. Fun.
Captain Adelaide Brooke and The Doctor
from Doctor Who. Suggested by Mix

Games (Back to top)

Impossible is just a word to let people feel good about themselves when they quit.
Vyse, to crew
from Skies of Arcadia by Rieko Kodama. Suggested by Dragonsworn
Women are like sunsets. They are beautiful, but there will be a different one tomorrow. Gilder, to Vyse
from Skies of Arcadia by Rieko Kodama. Suggested by Dragonsworn
It's time to kick ass and chew bubblegum,
and I'm all out of gum.
Duke Nukem
from Duke Nukem 3D. Suggested by Dragonsworn
Hadouken! Ryu
from Street Fighter. Suggested by Dragonsworn
I am Error. Person, to Link
from Zelda 2 by Shigeru Miyamoto. Suggested by Dragonsworn
Finish Him!!
from Mortal Kombat. Suggested by Dragonsworn
All your base are belong to us. Cats
from Zero Wing. Suggested by Dragonsworn
Looks like you were long overdue for retirement. Revolver Ocelot to Gurlukovich
from Metal Gear Solid 2 by Hideo Kojima. Suggested by Dragonsworn
Huzzah! Balrog, upon attacking Quote
from Cave Story by Daisuke Amaya (Pixel). Suggested by Bergioyn
I've got balls of steel. Duke Nukem
from Duke Nukem 3D by 3D Realms. Suggested by Bergioyn
The struggle for humanity is a war without end. And war ... war never changes
from Fallout 3 by Bethesda Softworks. Suggested by Bergioyn
Thank you Mario! But our princess is in another castle!
from Super Mario Bros. by Nintendo. Suggested by Bergioyn
I know it’s selfish ... but this is my story!
Tidus
from Final Fantasy X. Suggested by Dragonsworn
Right and wrong are not what separate us and our enemies. It’s our different standpoints, our perspectives that separate us.
Squall
from Final Fantasy VIII. Suggested by Dragonsworn
You stand before the final dimension,
and I am the darkness of eternity.
Necron
from Final Fantasy IX. Suggested by Dragonsworn
The Wheel of Time revolves eternally. Garland before the final battle
from Final Fantasy I by Hironobu Sakaguchi. Suggested by Dragonsworn
Know the shame of your OWN ignorance before you accuse OTHERS!
Colonel Mullen to Justin
from Grandia. Suggested by Dragonsworn
Those who are weak may only speak of justice, but the powerful will deliver it. Melfice
from Grandia 2. Suggested by Dragonsworn
Light and Darkness are as fire and wind. Fire brings warmth and comfort yet it withers that which it touches. The wind blows cold, lifting soil into the air, yet it also bears the seeds of earth. Each, then, brings both life and death. Mareg to Elena
from Grandia 2. Suggested by Dragonsworn
There is no truth in this world,
Yet the world is filled with truths.
from Baten Kaitos. Suggested by Dragonsworn
A true man never makes excuses for his shortcomings. Aika to Vigoro
from Skies of Arcadia by Rieko Kodama. Suggested by Dragonsworn
Transcending history and the world. A tale of souls and swords. Eternally retold. Soul Calibur 2 intro
from Soul Calibur 2. Suggested by Dragonsworn
Oh no, Not again! A grunt after being stuck with a grenade
from Halo 3. Suggested by MightyYT
Hey, where are you four brats off to now? What...? You're going to go save the world...? Did you get hit on the head or something!? Woman in Ur
from Final Fantasy III. Suggested by KaitLynn
Sometimes, when I got a lot on my mind, it just helps to go, "AAAAAAAAAAAH!" Rikku
from Final Fantasy X. Suggested by KaitLynn
When I grow up, I wanna be a blitzball! Kilika Kid
from Final Fantasy X. Suggested by KaitLynn
You. It's what's for dinner. Paine, said when casting Flare
from Final Fantasy X-2. Suggested by KaitLynn
Disasterrific!!! Rikku
from Final Fantasy X-2. Suggested by KaitLynn
...Driver! Faster, if you please. I would be loath to expend any of the violence of my present mood on my companions. Ffamran "Balthier" Mid Bunansa
from Final Fantasy XII. Suggested by KaitLynn
Hmph. I daresay I've soiled my cuffs. If a dungeon's waiting for us at the end of the night, it had best have a change of wardrobe. Ffamran "Balthier" Mid Bunansa
from Final Fantasy XII. Suggested by KaitLynn
Remember what curiosity killed. Just a friendly word of advice. Ffamran "Balthier" Mid Bunansa
from Final Fantasy XII. Suggested by KaitLynn
The gods are toying with us. Fran
from Final Fantasy XII. Suggested by KaitLynn
First you will be baked, and then there will be cake. GLaDOS, to Chell
from Portal by Valve. Suggested by louiemma
Even though I smell of excrement, I deserve your respect. Secret Agent, to a passing air molecule
from Psychonauts. Suggested by louiemma
Why do you rebuild, knowing destruction is inevitable? Why do you yearn to live, knowing all things must die? Kefka, to party
from Final Fantasy VI by Hironobu Sakaguchi. Suggested by General Cyan
Stop poking me! Orc Peon
from Warcraft II by Blizzard Games. Suggested by Blaine
A man chooses; a slave obeys. Andrew Ryan's dying words
from Bioshock by 2K Games. Suggested by Blaine
I need a Weapon Master Chief
from Halo 2 by Bungie . Suggested by Blaine
Grenade! Get it off! Get it off! Grunt, when hit with a plasma grenade.
from Halo by Bungie. Suggested by Blaine
You wanna piece o' me, boy? Marine
from Starcraft by Blizzard. Suggested by Blaine
Sure thing, Jim. Me and the boys been talking, and everyone's real sorry. They'll never do it again.
Max Payne, surrounded by corpses he killed a minute ago
from Max Payne by Remedy Enertainment. Suggested by Blaine
DODONGO DISLIKES SMOKE. Old man in a cave
from The Legend of Zelda by N/A. Suggested by lord-of-shadow
WHEN ALL ELSE FAILS USE FIRE. Random guy in a house
from Zelda II: Adventure of Link. Suggested by lord-of-shadow
Human, monster, sea, sky...
A scene on the lid of a sleeper's eye...
Awake the dreamer and Koholint will vanish, much like a bubble on a needle.
Inscription in the Southern Face Shrine
from Zelda: Link's Awakening. Suggested by lord-of-shadow
When the sun rose into the sky, a burning wind punished my lands, searing the world. And when the moon climbed into the dark of night, a frigid gale pierced our homes.

No matter when it came, the wind carried the same thing... Death.
Ganondorf's monologue
from Zelda: The Wind Waker. Suggested by lord-of-shadow
Do a barrel roll! Peppy Hare, on Corneria
from Star Fox 64. Suggested by lord-of-shadow
Son of a submariner! Kefka, after the protagonists escape Figaro Castle
from Final Fantasy VI. Suggested by lord-of-shadow
Would you kindly? Atlas, to trigger the avatar's mental conditioning
from Bioshock. Suggested by lord-of-shadow
The cake is a lie! Disturbing graffiti scrawled on the wall
from Portal. Suggested by lord-of-shadow
You can't hide from the Grim Reaper. Especially when he's got a gun. Manny Calavera
from Grim Fandango. Suggested by Nate
You fool! You gave cheese to a lactose intolerant volcano god! Lemonhead
from The Curse of Monkey Island. Suggested by Nate
When I said "deadly neurotoxin," the "deadly" was in massive sarcasm quotes. I could take a bath in this stuff. Put it on cereal, rub it right into my eyes ... honestly, it's not deadly at all... to ME. You, on the other hand, are going to find its deadliness ... a lot less funny. GlaDOS
from Portal. Suggested by Nate
If history is to change, let it change. If the world is to be destroyed, so be it. If my fate is to die, I must simply laugh. Magus, fatalistic after defeat at the hands of the player
from Chrono Trigger. Suggested by lord-of-shadow
Gone is the magical kingdom of Zeal, and all the dreams and ambitions of its people. Magus, in the aftermath of the destruction of Zeal
from Chrono Trigger. Suggested by lord-of-shadow
Am I butterfly dreaming I'm a man? Or a bowling ball dreaming I'm a plate of sashimi? Never assume what you see and feel is real! Doreen, in the surreal city of Enhasa
from Chrono Trigger. Suggested by lord-of-shadow
Conrad, I haven't been shot in the head nearly enough times to make that sound like a good idea. Commander Shepherd, when Conrad asks for a promotion.
from Mass Effect. Suggested by lord-of-shadow
- The geth are perfect ambushers, Williams. They don't make noise, they don't move, they don't even breathe!

- Sir, they have flashlight heads.
Shepard and Ashley discussing Geth ambush parties
from Mass Effect. Suggested by lord-of-shadow
I'll be going now. I'll come back when it's all over. Aerith's last words
from Final Fantasy VII. Suggested by Nate
Every person is a book with thousands of pages and on each lies an irreparable truth. Al Mualim, the Hashshashin leader
from Assassin's Creed. Suggested by lord-of-shadow
I've spent my entire surgical career creating the same tired shapes, over and over again: the upturned nose, the cleft chin, the ample bosom. Wouldn't it be wonderful if I could do with a knife what that old Spaniard did with a brush? Dr. Steinman, referring to Picasso's cubism
from Bioshock. Suggested by lord-of-shadow
The right man in the wrong place can make all the difference in the world. The G-man, to Gordon Freeman
from Half-Life 2. Suggested by lord-of-shadow
Your lives that I spit on are now but a caricature of a cartoon drawn by a kid who is stupid! Fawful, badmouthing Mario and Luigi before a battle
from Mario and Luigi Superstar Saga. Suggested by lord-of-shadow
Blacker than a moonless night. Hotter and more bitter than hell itself... That is coffee. Godot.
from Trials and Tribulations. Suggested by lord-of-shadow
Did you know you can donate one or all of your vital organs to the Aperture Science Self Esteem Fund for Girls? It's true! GLaDOS
from Portal. Suggested by lord-of-shadow
- You fight like a Dairy Farmer!
- How appropriate, you fight like a Cow!
Guybrush, dueling a pirate
from The Secret of Monkey Island. Suggested by lord-of-shadow
By ourselves, we are lonely, so we try to draw together to live. That's what it means to be human. That's how people live. A single hand cannot clap. Elhaym Van Houten
from Xenogears. Suggested by Nate
An open mind is like a fortress with its gates unbarred and unguarded. The Space Marine Librarian
from Warhammer 40,000: Dawn of War. Suggested by lord-of-shadow
Is there anyone who is almost dead, with no arms and legs, or in need of an abdominal operation? No one? Well, that's depressing. A Nurse
from Xenogears. Suggested by Nate
What may be an eternity to man is a moment for god. I have no need for hesitation. Krelian, discussing patience.
from Xenogears. Suggested by lord-of-shadow
Being given one's place frees one from any risks. Misfortunes may be blamed on others. Under total surveillance there is no need to bear the price of maintaining one's identity. They simply live under the delusion of being an individual. What could be easier? Dr. Citan Uzuki, talking about a dystopian society.
from Xenogears. Suggested by lord-of-shadow
Sit your ass down in that chair and drink your goddam TEA! Cid, to Shera
from Final Fantasy VII. Suggested by Monkey
Advisement: Evisceration works well. Electrocution, blunt trauma, and decapitation are also effective, I understand. HK-47
from Knights of the Old Republic. Suggested by AliasRY
There is no cow level.
from World of Warcraft. Suggested by Wibble
Look out! It's a monster! Jill, to Barry
from Resident Evil. Suggested by Wibble
Oh. No, don't thank me. Have fun, you three. The Doctor, to Quote after incapacitating The King.
from Cave Story by Daisuke Amaya (Pixel). Suggested by Bergioyn
Now is the time to choose! Die and be free of pain or live and fight your sorrow! Now is the time to shape your stories! Your fate is in your hands! Auron
from FFX. Suggested by Deadsy
You look like a bear wearing a marshmallow. Cloud Strife
from FFVII. Suggested by Deadsy
You're going to have to take something I say on faith, councillor! Commander Shepard to the Turian councilor
from Mass Effect. Suggested by Mats Gambling Buddy
Why is it whenever someone says "with all due respect", they really mean "kiss my ass"? Ashley Williams
from Mass Effect. Suggested by Mats Gambling Buddy
Sometimes crazy is the best way to go. Urdnott Wrex
from Mass Effect. Suggested by Mats Gambling Buddy
I can't die... Momma said I can't die... Augustus Cole
from Gears of War. Suggested by Mats Gambling Buddy
"You sank my battleship!" From the annoying commercial for the game Battleship
from Milton Bradley. Suggested by Tom
Leeeeeeeeeeeeeerooooy Jenkins!
from World of Warcraft. Suggested by Dominic
It’s just if she’s all stopped up, she can cure it by shaving her head and thumping her rump three times.
Rapp, about Feena
from Grandia. Suggested by Dragonsworn
Death...
Assassin...
Those who order the kill,
Those who kill,
Those who are killed.
Those are the three elements required of this job.
I am the one who kills.
Johan the assassin
from SaGa Frontier 2. Suggested by Dragonsworn
Men are like fish. Easy to catch, briefly satisfying and then nothing more than a bag of bones that stinks up the tent. Buki, to Elco and Tal
from Sudeki. Suggested by Dragonsworn
My heart goes unfulfilled…
Is fate this twisted, this determined to end the melodies of life?
Mooncalf in Chronicle 10
from Soul Calibur III. Suggested by Dragonsworn
He is a wound in the Force, more presence than flesh, and in his wake life dies… sacrificing itself to his hunger. Visas Marr on Darth Nihilus
from KOTOR II / Star Wars by George Lucas. Suggested by Scott Blademaster
You really shouldn't have done that. Enjoy the view. Lord Sheogorath
from Elderscrolls IV:Shivering Isles (expansion) by Bethesda Softworks. Suggested by Bergioyn
The Crossroads is under attack! Local Defense
from World of Warcraft by Blizzard Entertainment. Suggested by Jedi Wolf Sister
Seeing the back of your head comforts me; it means you've still got one. elf following you in an escort quest
from Champions of Norrath: Realms of Everquest by Sony Online Entertainment. Suggested by Jedi Wolf Sister
I hope one of us dies. I hope that one is you, Skrotee. Brote, a gnome slave in Venomspite, to the other gnome slave
from World of Warcraft by Blizzard Entertainment. Suggested by Jedi Wolf Sister
And you know what p*sses me off the most, Skrotee? No, not that we've been made into a living cuckoo clock for the amusement of the Forsaken. And not that we have to endure being spat upon and mocked every waking moment of our time here... What p*sses me off the most is being made to wear these d*mn short-shorts... Brote, a gnome slave in Venomspite, to the other gnome slave
from World of Warcraft by Blizzard Entertainment. Suggested by Jedi Wolf Sister
Beware of he who would deny you access to information, for in his heart he dreams himself your master. Commissioner Pravin Lal, U.N. Declaration of Rights
from Alpha Centauri. Suggested by lord-of-shadow
The unplanned organism is a question asked by nature and answered by death. You are a different question, with a different answer. Morgan Everett's Daedalus Prototype
from Deus Ex. Suggested by lord-of-shadow
Go for the eyes Boo! GO FOR THE EYES! RAAAAAAAAGH! Minsc the Barbarian to Boo the miniature giant space hamster
from Baldur's Gate 2. Suggested by lord-of-shadow
What is it with you and this “purify” thing? For some reason I doubt your knights are packing soap and bubble bath in that armor.

Ryudo to High Priestess Selene
from Grandia 2. Suggested by Dragonsworn
The Lords of Moria have returned! NPC Dwarves in Moria
from Lord of the rings online or LOTRO by Turbine. Suggested by Beqi
Ooooh, soft Zidane to Garnet, re: her ass
from Final Fantasy IX. Suggested by Monkey
You are a very harsh master, Master. I like you HK-47
from Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic by Bioware. Suggested by Bergioyn
Here, you take this blackjack and use it on any lazy peons you find sleeping on the job. A good smack will get them right back to work! ...
Lousy slacking peons...
Foreman Thazz'ril (quest giver)
from World of Warcraft by Blizzard Entertainment. Suggested by Jedi Wolf Sister
Do you wish to fight me? Magus
from Chrono Trigger. Suggested by Tor
Nothing like a brush with death to make you... not like death much. Alistair, after nearly dying
from Dragon Age. Suggested by lord-of-shadow
Was it red-red-green or red-green-red? Delta-62 "Scorch"
from Star Wars: Republic Commando by Lucasarts. Suggested by Bergioyn
What is this ominous light that threatens to engulf us?! Regal bryant
from Tales of symphonia. Suggested by fistofpainx
You were almost a Jill sandwich. Barry to Jill, after Jill was almost crushed
from Resident Evil. Suggested by fistofpainx
Lord Bhelen attacks assembly and is ignominiously slain! Epic fail! Orzammar town crier, after a failed coup
from Dragon Age. Suggested by lord-of-shadow
A man is made by the quality of his enemies. King Maric, to Loghain.
from Dragon Age. Suggested by lord-of-shadow
Takes me back to the old days. Us against the unknown. Killing it with big guns. Good times. Urdnot Wrex, to Commander Shepard
from Mass Effect 2. Suggested by lord-of-shadow
Is there some sort of "Kick Me" sign stuck to the defense's bench!? Miles Edgeworth, to himself
from Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney, Trials and Tribulations by Capcom. Suggested by Bergioyn
I'm having trouble hearing you. I'm getting a lot of bulls**t on this line. Commander Shepard to the Illusive Man
from Mass Effect 2. Suggested by Mats Gambling Buddy
Focus, Justice! Time to take advantage of her!
...I mean, of her mistake!
Apollo Justice, to himself
from Apollo Justice: Ace Attorney by Capcom. Suggested by Bergioyn
I don't need a reason to help people. Zidane
from FF IX. Suggested by FuRiA_KuTaSoW
To be forgotten is worse than death. Freya
from FF IX. Suggested by FuRiA_KuTaSoW
It is a good day to die! Corsair
from StarCraft. Suggested by FuRiA_KuTaSoW
Oh sure. I'll hide ze enormous gun. Pak 38 50mm gun crew upon toggling the camouflage ability
from Company of Heroes. Suggested by Cannoli
Ok. Look. We both said a lot of things that you are going to regret, but I think we can put our differences behind us. For Science. You monster. GLaDOS to Chell
from Portal 2. Suggested by AliasRY
She kissed me once, you know. My reaction triangulated somewhere between shock, arousal, and fear.

My love life is weird.
Harry Dresden, about Sigrun Gard
from Dresden Files RPG - Our World by Evil Hat Productions/J Butcher. Suggested by Tavi
We're ALL doomed! Xan the Terminally Depressed Elf
from Baldur's Gate by Developed by BioWare. Suggested by Joel
Go for the optics, Chiktikka! GO FOR THE OPTICS! Tali'Zorah vas Normandy, to her drone Chiktikka vas Paus
from Mass Effect 2. Suggested by Ghavrel
You must gather your party before venturing forth. Voice over as you leave a party required area
from Baldur's Gate. Suggested by Foxhead
You have been waylaid by enemies and must defend yourself. Voice over
from Baldur's Gate. Suggested by Foxhead
The truck have started to move. Solid snake, after getting in a truck.
from Metal Gear, NES. Suggested by Narg
You're a t**t! Jonathon the Gnome to Brian the Gnome Collector
from Fable 3. Suggested by Foxhead
England is not in Europe, actually. We tolerate Europe, like a person tolerates herpes. Shaun to Rebecca
from Assassin's Creed: Brotherhood by Ubisoft. Suggested by soilent brad
Yeah, well if you want me in a tin foil mini skirt and thigh-high boots, I'm gonna need dinner first... Uh... sir...
Ashley Williams
from Mass Effect by BioWare. Suggested by Bergioyn
Who votes to take the vehicle into the creepy underground tunnel?
Liara T'Soni
from Mass Effect by BioWare. Suggested by Bergioyn
I think... I'm just trying very hard not to think of it as a huge pneumatic penis. Tycho, to Gabe and the player re: a giant robot
from On the Rain-Slick: Precipice of Darkness Episode 2 by Penny Arcade & Hothead Games. Suggested by soilent brad
This is all Joker's fault. What a tool he was. I have to spend all day computing pi because he plugged in the Overload. Joker, complaining
from Mass Effect 2 by BioWare. Suggested by Bergioyn
What the shit! Joker
from Mass Effect 2 by BioWare. Suggested by Bergioyn
It seems like Garrus has finally worked that stick out of his butt, but now he's trying to beat guys to death with it. I can't believe I like the old Garrus better. Joker, about Garrus
from Mass Effect 2 by BioWare. Suggested by Bergioyn
Thane seems like the strong, sensitive, murdering type. You know those are always great to have around. A real cuddler.
Joker, about Thane
from Mass Effect 2 by BioWare. Suggested by Bergioyn
You know what pisses me off? Calling this the cockpit. Alliance ships have bridges. Asari ships have cockpits. Oh wait. No they don't. Joker
from Mass Effect 2 by BioWare. Suggested by Bergioyn
I've been thinking about taking up bullfighting. What do you think? Joker
from Mass Effect 2 by BioWare. Suggested by Bergioyn
Commander, can I get a mirror up here? You know, so I can see when someone is standing behind me? Joker
from Mass Effect 2 by BioWare. Suggested by Bergioyn
Pew pew pew. Yeah.
Joker, making sounds of laser battle
from Mass Effect 2 by BioWare. Suggested by Bergioyn
External camera's got a thumbprint on it. That is gonna bug me forever.
Joker
from Mass Effect 2 by BioWare. Suggested by Bergioyn
You look out there and it's just like... There's all this... it's like... you know?
Joker
from Mass Effect 2 by BioWare. Suggested by Bergioyn
Why is it always claw and guns? Why can't we piss off a fuzzy planet? Still dangerous, but hey, bunnies.
Joker
from Mass Effect 2 by BioWare. Suggested by Bergioyn
- Do you have to make everything into a sexual innuendo?
- I'd like to in-your-endo.
CODEX and BLADEZZ
from The Guild by Felicia Day. Suggested by Mix
Hyjal kids, Hyjal wives! They're lancing everyone in here! starting jousting quest in Mount Hyjal
from World of Warcraft. Suggested by LadyLorraine
Answer: Select grenades, sonic screamers, cluster rockets, and plasma charges. Mines are also effective, since many Jedi will run to meet you in hand-to-hand combat. Silly Jedi. KH-47 discussing how to fight Jedi
from Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic 2. Suggested by lord-of-shadow

ReadAndFindOut/Community (Back to top)

I was young and needed the money.
from the Community Message Board by Ironclad (Jens). Suggested by Floffe
Quality procrastination should always be given the time it needs. ©amilla
from A post, later in Floffe's signature. Suggested by Floffe
I have nothing to add. I just wanted to be included in this thread. Colonel Logain
from his signature. Suggested by Dragonsworn
21st November 2011: To create new genetic stock, humans forced to breed regularly.
from RAFO: A Future History by Monkey. Suggested by Bergioyn
Read and find out.
from Robert Jordan. Suggested by Great Lord of Chaos
Who is this 'Paah'? Hopper Aes Sedai
from WoT Message Board. Suggested by Deadsy
Did you move to readandfindout.com? Brandon Sanderson to our very own @my
from readandfindout.com. Suggested by Mats Gambling Buddy
Because Reality is Lame Wotmania Class of 2008 slogan
from Voted for by citizens of Wotmania. Suggested by MightyYT
How can fish get PhDs? Mary
from Tim & Rebekah's flat, during normal conversation. Suggested by Rebekah
For example, once you've seen one deity-induced orgy, you've seen them all. Sookie Stackhouse / True Blood Discussion
from Sci-Fi & Fantasy Messageboard by Jayhawk. Suggested by Missa Sedai
Being wrong about Egwene is an ... odd ... feeling
Cannoli, about to embark on another rant about Egwene
from The Read and Find Out Message Board by Cannoli. Suggested by Insomdeon
And hey. I'll eat most anything once. Quote about horse meat
from Community Message Board by LadyLorraine. Suggested by Beqi
I’ve got the equipment and I know how to use it.
Jumping a strange woman in his parking lot.
from The CMB by Tigr. Suggested by Beqi
A gaggle of geese, a murder of crows, a paah of Forsaken.
from Mysterious New Forsaken? by Joel. Suggested by Deadsy
Ben, you look like a flower.
from Camilla, RAFO Gathering Edinburgh 2010. Suggested by Rebekah
This made me blush. rebelaessedai, of LiterateDog's Birthday Celebration
from Community Message Board by RAFO. Suggested by Joel
I'm pretty sure this is part of Brandon Sanderson's master plan to make humanity's culture so awesome that when we finally meet some aliens, they'll be so impressed that they will give everyone free alien-cake. Beetnemesis in a review
from Regarding Brandon Sanderson's The Way of Kings by Beetnemesis. Suggested by MightyYT
- Oh, that reminds me...
- If the next two words out of your mouth are 'shock collar', I'm leaving right now.
from Conversation between Missa Sedai and Tavi. Suggested by Tavi
And I don't want to go running around the roof looking for Urza. Camilla, on what (not) to do when RAFO is down
from The Community Board. Suggested by Legolas
The funny thing is, if we all played on the same server, I'd probably play all the fucking time, because it would be like wotmania chat with lightning bolts. Taskmaster Jack (Re: playing WoW on one server)
from RAFO. Suggested by Kotagg
I mean, if everyone had a soul, there would be no contrast by which we could appreciate it. For giving us this perspective, we thank you. In response to Camilla's dislike of Disney songs.
from TV & Movies discussion of Brave by Nate. Suggested by Stephen