Trying to figure out the root causes of why individual conservatives don't like gay marriage will invariably ignore three important points plus the fact that most people have widely different reasons not particularly related to religion for why they disapprove of gays.

1: Most people don't really like gays, lots of people just fake it

2: Most conservatives don't really like liberals

3: Most visible gays are liberals

From which it follows most conservatives don't like anything to do with gay rights because its 1) Gay and 2) Viewed as something the liberals want

That's it, no mysteries, no nothing. Conservatives probably dislike gays no more than libs do, they just don't lie to others or themselves much about it. They don't really stand to benefit from changing their minds either, though the valiant efforts of the Log Cabin Republicans may change that, they got a mostly warm, in some cases enthusiastic welcome at CPAC, because if there's one thing conservatives love more than family values it's displays of self-sacrificing loyalty.

I'm pretty sure the Fagenda (That's what you people are calling it these days right, so I'm hip and PC right?) could make a lot more progress is it put out a video of two gun toting lesbians talking about how because they couldn't get married they couldn't secure a proper house loan and therefore live in a bad neighborhood as a result of the welfare state brought on by the vile commie-atheists liberals and how they couldn't move out of it because the eco-nuts at the EPA stole their land for an endangered beetle, and that's why they need guns to protect them and their adopted son who they rescued from a third world commie/muslim nation with aid of brave Christian missionaries but the dirty liberals want to take their guns away and how will they protect themselves and their family then. Nail a cross to the door and hang a flag and the right will declare them national heroes, hell I'm angry just thinking about it and I just made it up. Point being there's not much lying around to get behind and people want visible heroes to switch views, Daniel Choi for instance probably won a lot more silent approval from the right then most non-conservatives would believe but he'd have had an even bigger impact if he'd said "Repeal DADT, it's just another way of the government trying to control our personal lives like Obamacare"