There is no brainwashing gun or secret satellite surveillance networks, we are not using pennies to collect your DNA samples, there is no conspiracy. Fortunately, concerned citizens have created a resort to help relieve anxiety for those who have developed false concerns over a secret conspiracy running the world who all the world leaders OBEY. World Leaders certainly do not OBEY THE SECRET COUNCIL, but rather, The People, who Have Noble intent and Free Will !!!

Mt. Dhoom Island Resort (Dhoom is I think French for Sunny happy place) is a free vacation and counseling location for those who have these troubling concerns, where short seminars are run to discuss people's concerns, with plenty of free time to soak up the mind rays. If you would like more information, please send us your name and address, and WE'LL COME FIND YOU, you won't even need to go to the airport on your own, as we have stealth helicopters that can come right to your home to pick you up without loud noises disturbing your neighbors. Please keep in mind this is a charitable organization with limited resources so we can only take the most severe cases, so please DO NOT TELL ANYONE where you're going. Once at the resort, You Will be free to Do As You please and not as you Are Told, enjoying either the beautiful scenery or attending our seminars. Mt. Dhoom has a rich local ecosystem full of rare species, such as wolves, sharks, baracudas, and Yeti. Our on-site hypno-therapists are the best in the world and can even help you quit smoking.

So, my friends, if you are feeling paranoid, or if you know anyone who is, just give us your name and address. Please don't hesitate to SUBMIT TO US the names of anyone you know who fears a grand conspiracy.

Thank you, and a fine Mahok to you all!