Active Users:181 Time:18/05/2024 08:28:55 PM
There's an irritatingly large amount of that on Cracked these days, or even The Onion - Edit 1

Before modification by Isaac at 29/11/2011 03:12:55 AM

No, it's supposed to be a humor website, but this nearing-middle-aged-loser who is just getting his life on track, made friends with an editor or something, so he gets this asinine weekly feature where he spouts off some breaktaking life-changing revelation that all of us who can from non-retarded, functional families took in with our mothers' milk. His whining, tiresome bleating and crowing about his recent discovery that water is wet and how if only he had known this, he would not have kept his electronics in the swimming pool, so heed his wisdom on the subject everyone, takes up space that actual funny or even informative writers could be using. I want to find this guy just so I can take up drinking and drugs in front of him and drive him off the wagon.


I was feeling a touch masochistic so I inflicted my brain with some of his articles. Some have a touch of humor, most are sufficiently idiotic, especially in the targeting of his soapbox denunciations, that I almost thought it might be an attempt to deliberately write from the standpoint of a shallow, self-absorbed moron who has finally made some half-assed attempts to grow up at least a decade after he was supposed to for the humor value. I don't think it's an act, but I find his articles much more humorous if I pretend that's the case. I was laughing about his knocking Corning for trying to sell a bathroom mirror with TV/net options and saying they'd never spoken to a real person until I realized he was serious, and really didn't think there was anyone who might want to be able to watch the news or look at their email while brushing their teeth or shaving, odd since people do both in cars even. I guess, though, that he finds brushing his teeth or shaving so incredibly mentally taxing that he can't imagine anyone having brain power to divert to other tasks while doing either.

I resent his work, is what I'm trying to say.


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