But I did warn you.

And I did try.

“You’ve a wishbone there,
where your backbone ought to be,
And you live your life bound up in fear,
But hearken child of Eve to me!

If you wish to be thought fair,
Shadow will hang over thee,
Keep your courage tucked up near
And soon disaster you will see.

Of stinging tentacles beware,
Or I shall bring you such glee,
Perhaps you'd like skin so clear,
And a life under the sea,

If you can within one year,
Show that you’ll no bend your knee,
Then beauty you shall ever have,
And peace, and love, my dear sweet pea. ”

In my defense, it is a YA novel so... you know...