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This sounds like a job for ... Nate Send a noteboard - 29/11/2011 11:07:03 PM
... SuperNate!

~clears throat~

Here's what I'd do with what you wrote:

I scry you've grown a wishbone there,
Whereon your backbone ought to be.
Your days have sewn more fear than fair,
But hearken child of Eve to me!

If beauty be your head's desire,
Naught but shade shall dance with thee;
And if you hide your heart's true fire,
Soon disaster will you see.

(I have no idea what this third stanza means in your story, so I'mma wing it.)

This curse upon you, note it well,
Choose one path or the other free.
Beyond these roads two, truth I tell,
Lie pains in one or joys in three.

If you within the year uphold
To stand for you and bend no knee,
Then yours shall be a beauty gold,
And peace, and love, my sweetest pea.
Warder to starry_nite

Chapterfish — Nate's Writing Blog
http://chapterfish.wordpress.com
This message last edited by Nate on 29/11/2011 at 11:07:40 PM
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Oh, Hello there! You guys like to read, right? Well, I need your help! ^_^ [UPDATED] globug0822 - 29/11/2011 07:31:51 PM 589 Views
I'm not really sure there's enough context there to help Isaac - 29/11/2011 08:06:02 PM 292 Views
Fear Darrig globug0822 - 29/11/2011 10:09:16 PM 352 Views
*muse* I'm thinking about the character from V for Vendetta LadyLorraine - 29/11/2011 08:32:34 PM 312 Views
MmmmM... me likes. globug0822 - 29/11/2011 10:10:03 PM 319 Views
To wry from writ will wreak wroth! globug0822 - 30/11/2011 12:25:10 AM 348 Views
"Listen to me very carfully you large oafish fool. You will do just as I instruct or.... Urza - 29/11/2011 08:42:42 PM 325 Views
Try weaving the rhymes Camilla - 29/11/2011 09:01:39 PM 317 Views
Weaving the rhymes? globug0822 - 29/11/2011 10:14:55 PM 319 Views
ABABAB, presumably. *NM* Legolas - 29/11/2011 10:16:14 PM 135 Views
Yes, yes... globug0822 - 29/11/2011 10:18:41 PM 333 Views
Oh. Sorry. *NM* Legolas - 29/11/2011 10:24:33 PM 126 Views
nah... honest mistake... globug0822 - 29/11/2011 10:34:29 PM 284 Views
ah Camilla - 30/11/2011 06:42:01 AM 377 Views
I see. Good point. *NM* globug0822 - 02/12/2011 03:06:36 AM 171 Views
Blergh. It still sounds crap! globug0822 - 29/11/2011 10:36:10 PM 349 Views
This sounds like a job for ... Nate - 29/11/2011 11:07:03 PM 335 Views
the addition of archaic sounding language does a lot. *NM* LadyLorraine - 29/11/2011 11:24:09 PM 154 Views
Wow. globug0822 - 29/11/2011 11:53:46 PM 316 Views
Oh And.... globug0822 - 30/11/2011 12:12:09 AM 327 Views
Alright... here's my second stab at it. globug0822 - 30/11/2011 04:06:10 AM 315 Views
Dust and Sparkles! TaskmasterJack - 30/11/2011 01:36:58 AM 304 Views
Uhm... The thread you were looking for... globug0822 - 30/11/2011 04:22:50 AM 324 Views
I am equal parts embarrassed by and proud/jealous of you; congrats. Joel - 30/11/2011 03:03:20 PM 290 Views
hahahahaha i was so confused there for a second LadyLorraine - 30/11/2011 03:17:09 PM 291 Views
Ah ha. Joel - 30/11/2011 03:56:27 PM 296 Views
globug0822 - 02/12/2011 03:09:51 AM 389 Views
Joel - 02/12/2011 01:44:36 PM 281 Views
BwAhHAhAhHAhaa... globug0822 - 02/12/2011 03:10:09 AM 357 Views
Well, I had a few RL friends who all joined in... globug0822 - 02/12/2011 03:08:49 AM 346 Views
Wait, peer pressure can be a GOOD thing? Joel - 02/12/2011 01:47:06 PM 349 Views
Indeed. globug0822 - 03/12/2011 12:33:43 AM 525 Views
It would. Joel - 03/12/2011 11:38:35 PM 394 Views
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