View original postIf you are put off by narcissistic, self-indulgent bullshit, please don’t read any further. I feel you. I’m good with that. More often than not, I would be right there.
That's silly. This isn't narcissistic or si-bs, it's life. So don't apologize for needing to get the poison out.
View original postIt’s not working.
View original postPeople make fatuous statements about how each day will get a little bit easier.
View original postThey’re wrong.
No, I imagine it won't work for a while. Those people aren't wrong, but three weeks is no time at all. I'm so sorry it's so hard, but it's impossible to force it. I'm sure it's harder when it's a spouse, but from my experience with my father's death, I can say you need more time. Much more time.
View original postI always viewed myself as a tough old son of a bitch. Not anymore. I weep like a baby at the drop of a hat. Songs, TV shows, lines in books and magazines, even watching the snowfall today, fill me with an irrevocable sense of loss. These were all things I formerly shared with the most important person in my life. I can’t anymore. I never will again.
You are tough, but you're also human. It has always pissed me off that society makes men think they are weak if they cry. It's complete nonsense, and you have no control over it. THIS IS SAD. BE SAD. It says absolutely nothing about your true character. And anyway, screw anyone who might think it's weakness. Your wife would have known that true character and loved THAT, not your tough bastard shell.
View original postI apologize once again for this sappy drivel. I’m ashamed to be writing it. The simple act of visualizing my feelings as I type them into a word doc somehow eases the constant ache in my heart. So I guess I’m doing it for me. Please don’t feel compelled to reply. I’m not looking for pity. I’m trying to convince myself there is a reason to keep going. I try to focus on my kids, my granddaughter, and how much they need me. While I believe that’s true, on an emotional level I just want to be with Laurel again.
I know what you mean, and even though this is going to sound like I stole it from Hallmark, I'm going to say it anyway. I truly, deeply believe that Laurel is there. She's you and your kids and grandkids, now.
I apologize to all of you for what I am about to write.
- 15/03/2017 03:12:32 AM
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You're apologizing for the wrong thing.
- 15/03/2017 12:28:57 PM
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Hell, don't apologize to us. And run with the pain, not from it.
- 15/03/2017 02:46:26 PM
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I can't imagine what it would be like to have your child murdered.
- 15/03/2017 03:10:00 PM
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*NM*
I'm glad you can share with us and maybe, just maybe, get some comfort from us.
- 15/03/2017 05:27:33 PM
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There is bleeding all over the internet and there is true sharing that touches everyone who reads it
- 15/03/2017 06:52:25 PM
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