Most of your issues seem to stem from needing to go really fast all the time. I guess maybe it's a game that rewards a slower pace compared to the GTA games. For me, that's a draw. For others, obviously it might not be.

I didn't even know that about being able to time your spurs to maintain maximum speed. I don't go maximum speed. Hell, I rarely even go at the top non-constant-spurring speed.

I'm also the type of player who walks everywhere in Skyrim, instead of using a horse or the fast-travel system.