Active Users:434 Time:26/04/2024 08:28:19 PM
Re: Fair enough, but do you mind me waiting just a little bit? DomA Send a noteboard - 26/05/2014 09:10:31 PM

View original post How about before I do that, I post a link to the beginning paragraphs from a just-released book that straddles the realism/speculative imaginary line that I consider to be effective prose (maybe that should be a better word choice on my part, talking about effective/non-effective prose, as that allows for greater leeway)?

Interesting.

It immediately reminded me of John Irving's prose and style and the "colorful" way he might have chosen to tell those bits where other authors would choose a far more straightforward approach.

It certainly is a strong/promising beginning.

Irving also has a knack to make you anticipate and want to read what he'll get to a few paragraphs later only. Here you anticipate immediately it won't be her dad the child surprises (and the title promises something funny will end the scene), and a single child having a bunk bed is also a good "hook" that begins the slow reveal of what happened in that family.

(Opening of "A Widow for one year":


"The inadequate lamp shade

One night when she was four and sleeping in the bottom bunk of her bunk bed, Ruth Cole woke to the sound of lovemaking - it was coming from her parents' bedroom. It was a totally unfamiliar sound to her. Ruth had been recently ill with a stomach flu; when she first heard her mother making love, Ruth thought that her mother was throwing up.
It was not as simple a matter as her parents having separate bedrooms; that summer they had separate houses, although Ruth never saw the other house. Her parents spent alternate nights in the family house with Ruth; there was a rental house nearby, where Ruth's mother or father stayed when they weren't staying with Ruth. It was one of those ridiculous arrangements that couples make when they are separating, but before they are divorced- when they still imagine that children and property can be shared with more magnanimity than recrimination.
When Ruth woke to the foreign sound, she at first wasn't sure if it was her mother or her father who was throwing up; then, Ruth recognized that measure of melancholy and contained hysteria which was often detectable in her mother's voice. Ruth also remembered it was her mother's turn to stay with her.
The master bathroom separated Ruth's room from the master bedroom. When the four-year-old padded barefoot through the bathroom, she took a towel with her. (When she'd been sick with the stomach flu, her father had encouraged her to vomit in a towel.) Poor Mommy! Ruth tought, bringing her the towel.
In the dim moonlight, and in the even dimmer and erratic light from the night-light that Ruth's father had installed in the bathroom, Ruth saw the pale faces of her dead brother in the photographs on the bathroom's walls. There were photos of her dead brothers throughout the house, on all the walls; although the two boys had died as teenagers, before Ruth was born (before she was even conceived), Ruth felt that she knew these vanished young men far better than she knew her mother or father."


Or "Until I find you":


"In the Care of Churchgoers and Old Girls

According to his mother, Jack Burns was an actor before he was an actor, but Jack's most vivid memories of childhood were those moments when he felt compelled to hold his mother's hand. He wasn't acting then.
Of course we don't remember much until we're four or five years old - and what we remember at that early age is very selective or incomplete, or even false. What Jack recalled as the first time he felt the need to reach for his mom's hand was probably the hundredth or two hundredth time.
Preschools tests revealed that Jack Burns had a vocabulary beyond his years, which is not uncommon among only children accustomed to adult conversation - especially only children of single parents. But of greater significance, according to the tests, was Jack's capacity for consecutive memory, which, when he was three, was comparable to that of a nine-year-old. At four, his retention of detail and understanding of linear time were equal to an eleven-year-old's. (The details included, but were not limited to, such trivia as articles of clothing and the names of streets.)
These test results were bewildering to Jack's mother, who considered him to be an inattentive child; in her view, Jack's propensity for daydreaming made him immature for his age.
Nevertheless, in the fall of 1969, when Jack was four and had not yet started kindergarten, his mother walked him to the corner of Pickthall and Hutching Hill Road in Forest Hill, which was a nice neighborhood in Toronto. They were waiting for school to be let out, Alice explained, so that Jack could see the girls."


Of course, that's the start of an "unreliable narrator" story, which Irving soon strove to make the reader forget after spelling it out.


And the opening from "Last Night in Twisted River", which is also great, as it's revealed a bit after that the cook's wife/mother of the main character has died in similar way, which is a central pivot in the novel (which ends this way: "He felt that the great adventure of his life was just beginning—as his father must have felt, in the throes and dire circumstances of his last night in Twisted River."


Under the logs

The young Canadian, who could not have been more than fifteen, had hesitated too long. For a frozen moment, his feet had stopped moving on the floating logs in the basin above the river bend; he’d slipped entirely underwater before anyone could grab his outstretched hand. One of the loggers had reached for the youth’s long hair—the older man’s fingers groped around in the frigid water, which was thick, almost soupy, with sloughed-off slabs of bark. Then two logs collided hard on the would-be rescuers arm, breaking his wrist. The carpet of moving logs had completely closed over the young Canadian, who never surfaced; not even a hand or one of his boots broke out of the brown water.
Out on a logjam, once the key log was pried loose, the river drivers had to move quickly and continually; if they paused for even a second or two, they would be pitched into the torrent. In a river drive, death among moving logs could occur from a crushing injury, before you had a chance to drown—but drowning was more common.
From the riverbank, where the cook and his twelve-year-old son could hear the cursing of the logger whose wrist had been broken, it was immediately apparent that someone was in more serious trouble than the would-be rescuer, who’d freed his injured arm and had managed to regain his footing on the flowing logs. His fellow river drivers ignored him; they moved with small, rapid steps toward shore, calling out the lost boy’s name. The loggers ceaselessly prodded with their pike poles, directing the floating logs ahead of them. The rivermen were, for the most part, picking the safest way ashore, but to the cook’s hopeful son it seemed that they might have been trying to create a gap of sufficient width for the young Canadian to emerge. In truth, there were now only intermittent gaps between the logs. The boy who’d told them his name was “Angel Pope, from Toronto,” was that quickly gone."


I also love the opening lines/paragraphs of many of his other novels:

Son of the circus:


"Usually, the dwarfs kept bringing him back—back to the circus and back to India. The doctor was familiar with the feeling of leaving Bombay "for the last time"; almost every time he left India, he vowed that he'd never come back. Then years would pass - as a rule, not more than four or five - and once again he'd be taking the long flight from Toronto. That he was born in Bombay was not the reason; at least this was what the doctor claimed. Both his mother and father were dead; his sister lived in London, his brother in Zürich. The doctor's wife was Austrian, and their children and grandchildren lived in England and Canada; none of them wanted to live in India - they rarely visited the country- nor had a single one of them been born there, But the doctor was fated to go back to Bombay; he would keep returning again and again - if not forever, at least for as long as there were dwarfs in the circus."

In One Person :

"I'm going to begin by telling you about Miss Frost. While I say to everyone that I became a writer because I read a certain novel by Charles Dickens at the formative age of fifteen, the truth is I was younger than that when I first met Miss Frost and imagined having sex with her, and this moment of my sexual awakening also marked the fitful birth of my imagination. We are formed by what we desire. In less than a minute of excited, secretive longing, I desired to become a writer and to have sex with Miss Frost—not necessarily in that order.
I met Miss Frost in a library. I like libraries, though I have difficulty pronouncing the word—both the plural and the singular. It seems there are certain words I have considerable trouble pronouncing: nouns, for the most part—people, places, and things that have caused me preternatural excitement, irresolvable conflict, or utter panic. Well, that is the opinion of various voice teachers and speech therapists and psychiatrists who’ve treated me—alas, without success. In elementary school, I was held back a grade due to “severe speech impairments”—an overstatement. I’m now in my late sixties, almost seventy; I’ve ceased to be interested in the cause of my mispronunciations. (Not to put too fine a point on it, but fuck the etiology.)"

The World According to Garp:


"Garp's mother, Jenny Fields, was arrested in Boston in 1942 for wounding a man in a movie theater. This was shortly after the Japanese had bombed Pearl Harbor and people were being tolerant of soldiers, because suddenly everyone was a soldier, but Jenny Fields was quite firm in her intolerance of the behavior of men in general and soldiers in particular"

Hotel New Hampshire:


The summer my father bought the bear, none of us was born - we weren't even conceived: not Frank, the oldest; not Franny, the loudest; not me, the next; and not the youngest of us, Lilly and Egg. My father and mother were hometown kids who knew each other all their lives, but their "union" as Frank always called it, hadn't taken place when Father bought the bear.
"Their "union", Frank?" Franny used to tease him; although Frank was the oldest, he seemed younger than Franny, to me, and Franny always treated him as if he were a baby "What you mean, Frank," Franny said, "is that they hadn't started screwing."


This message last edited by DomA on 26/05/2014 at 09:42:07 PM
Reply to message
Friendly challenge to Larry and other literary "snobs" on the board..... - 25/05/2014 06:44:34 PM 1046 Views
As it happens, I wrote an example last year. - 25/05/2014 07:13:41 PM 1006 Views
Nice *NM* - 27/05/2014 02:43:53 AM 425 Views
Fair enough, but do you mind me waiting just a little bit? - 26/05/2014 04:57:18 AM 1010 Views
Re: Fair enough, but do you mind me waiting just a little bit? - 26/05/2014 09:10:31 PM 958 Views
I really should read Irving, I see - 27/05/2014 06:10:50 AM 875 Views
Re: I really should read Irving, I see - 28/05/2014 03:01:24 AM 876 Views
Promising opening paragraph, yes, but... - 26/05/2014 10:55:16 PM 771 Views
I think those shifts are part of the character, not something unintentional - 27/05/2014 06:08:44 AM 803 Views
So bad prose is okay if it is intentional? *NM* - 27/05/2014 03:54:34 PM 390 Views
Okay, I do of course miss the perspective of what comes after. - 27/05/2014 06:29:33 PM 699 Views
I proudly claim the title of literary snob, and will provide you with a quick, unscientific example. - 26/05/2014 08:15:04 PM 903 Views
LOL! - 26/05/2014 10:03:50 PM 1006 Views
Huh. Lana Del Rey quotes Nabokov... I had not made that connection. - 26/05/2014 11:17:47 PM 984 Views
That quote from Lolita sounds like it is from a romance novel with Fabio on the cover. - 27/05/2014 03:40:37 AM 798 Views
Bah! - 27/05/2014 07:50:15 PM 855 Views
Alloy of Law was great *NM* - 28/05/2014 08:16:26 PM 407 Views
Hell Yeah! *NM* - 28/05/2014 08:36:40 PM 369 Views
The audiobook was pretty great, as well. *NM* - 29/05/2014 09:19:07 PM 426 Views

Reply to Message