But I think we may have discussed this once or dozen....

I believe it's possible to find and know instantly, but so surpassingly rare and so easy to mistake if you've never experienced it that waiting or even looking for it would be monumentally stupid. Believe it or not I think I came to that position some time in the mid-nineties, but as far as specific dates, your guess is as good as mine.

I think what Amys describes far more common, yet still so exceptional it should be seized with both hands (but carefully, and if you break into .38 Special I'll hunt you down and beat you ) if you think there's even a chance. It's definitely not something to become obsessed with for its own sake and chase like Cibola, lest you get something more like ebola. Which is true of Love generally, so why bother categorizing and diagnosing?