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All evidence points to the real Santa having been killed back in 1947. Tom Send a noteboard - 18/12/2009 02:41:52 PM
Ranchers in Colorado shot down an unidentified flying object on Christmas Eve, 1947, after having read too much about the Roswell, NM incident in July of the same year. They found an overweight old man slumped over a sleigh that had crashed into the ground, surrounded by the carcasses of nine caribou.

The man's corpse was salvaged and pictures taken. However, by the time the FBI was called in to investigate, the caribou corpses had been eaten by scavengers and the sleigh could not be positively identified as anything more than a "Christmas decoration". The body had disappeared and the entire incident was closed in FBI archives as "common vandalism" and deemed a matter for local authorities.

However, 1948 turned out to be the infamous "Year without a Santa Claus" and it is speculated that the aliens that did indeed crash at Roswell are now responsible for deliveries of presents attributed to "Santa Claus". Given they look much like what people imagine elves to look like (though it's silly - real elves are actually average height but with extra-long fingers and noses), people assume the aliens are "Santa's elves".
Political correctness is the pettiest form of casuistry.

ἡ δὲ κἀκ τριῶν τρυπημάτων ἐργαζομένη ἐνεκάλει τῇ φύσει, δυσφορουμένη, ὅτι δὴ μὴ καὶ τοὺς τιτθοὺς αὐτῇ εὐρύτερον ἢ νῦν εἰσι τρυπώη, ὅπως καὶ ἄλλην ἐνταῦθα μίξιν ἐπιτεχνᾶσθαι δυνατὴ εἴη. – Procopius

Ummaka qinnassa nīk!

*MySmiley*
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Santa 'sets a bad example' - 17/12/2009 03:31:07 AM 768 Views
Ah, academia. Your ivory tower is so... lofty. *NM* - 17/12/2009 03:40:16 AM 592 Views
lol, ridiculous...... - 17/12/2009 03:44:02 AM 490 Views
I can't see that working - 17/12/2009 03:55:32 AM 482 Views
I read the title as Satan 'sets a bad example' - 17/12/2009 10:11:36 AM 410 Views
Don't forget that he also encourages infidelity - 17/12/2009 10:15:10 AM 438 Views
All evidence points to the real Santa having been killed back in 1947. - 18/12/2009 02:41:52 PM 373 Views

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