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I would like some opinions, please... damookster Send a noteboard - 20/12/2009 03:31:49 PM
I have a friend who has asked a favor of me. He is in the process of writing a book. It is non-fiction in the sense that it is the story of his family coming to America from Calabria in Southern Italy, but he is writing it as fiction (changing names, etc.). He sent me the first 50 pages in a pdf file and asked me for my input and criticism.

Here's the problem.

It's not very good.

The story itself is interesting. But it lacks flesh. A skilled writer paints pictures with words, describing scenes so that we can picture them in our minds as we read. His writing is lacking in such descriptions and reads more like someone recounting a story over dinner. Keeping to the important facts but trying to spare his guests the details that would, in that setting, lose their attention. As a result, it is herky-jerky and lacks a smooth flow.

So, what's the problem? Well, as many of you may have realized, I don't do the whole friends thing very well. I have known this man for over 40 years and still only see him maybe twice a year at the most. Yet gun to my head, I would have to call him my closest friend, after my wife. So how do I tell him his writing sucks without hurting his feelings? I got the sense from his phone call telling me the email was coming that he is extremely proud of what he is doing and sees this as possibly the next great Italian-American novel. Oy gevalt.
Mook

*MySmiley*



"Bustin' makes me feel good!"

Ghostbusters, by Ray Parker Jr.
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I would like some opinions, please... - 20/12/2009 03:31:49 PM 736 Views
Well, you could.... - 20/12/2009 03:52:25 PM 477 Views
Maybe I'm a coward - 20/12/2009 03:57:16 PM 543 Views
kind of like... - 20/12/2009 04:02:25 PM 483 Views
Well - 20/12/2009 04:15:04 PM 553 Views
Be up front with him. - 20/12/2009 04:13:52 PM 459 Views
I wouldn't tell him it sucks. - 20/12/2009 04:14:10 PM 455 Views
Ask him if he wants honesty. - 20/12/2009 05:49:49 PM 487 Views
what he said - 20/12/2009 06:09:33 PM 440 Views
Ah, see.... - 20/12/2009 06:24:53 PM 474 Views
Who says "no" when you say "do you want me to be honest?" mook isn't an editor, here - 20/12/2009 08:03:02 PM 475 Views
Bullshit. - 20/12/2009 08:12:16 PM 464 Views
I didn't object to criticism - 20/12/2009 10:30:39 PM 524 Views
This. - 20/12/2009 10:45:40 PM 454 Views
Tell him that you want to see him succeed as a writer and then... - 20/12/2009 06:06:47 PM 415 Views
Could use the critique sandwich. - 20/12/2009 06:13:31 PM 458 Views
Or just tell him it sucks, then give him an actual sandwich. - 21/12/2009 10:34:03 AM 470 Views
Do what my husband did with me. - 20/12/2009 08:11:33 PM 491 Views
In general, I agree with the sandwich method, but... - 21/12/2009 05:36:54 PM 466 Views
I like your answer. *NM* - 22/12/2009 03:25:33 AM 184 Views
My friend, you don't tell him that. - 22/12/2009 06:41:03 PM 508 Views

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