To be fair, Egwene could probably fall back on the "it was fated to be" thing too, given her Dreams (the prophetic ones, not the wet dreams), and Min's visions. They did get a little build-up in the series, e.g. Eg's discovery that Gawyn liked her but was hiding it, Gawyn letting Siuan & co. escape the Tower being based at least partially on his liking for the Egster, and Gawyn and Eg's extended makeout sessions in Cairhien. So it's pretty much the same minimal amount of foreshadowing as any other relationship in WoT; a glimmer of attraction here and there and then BAM, married.

Insofar as power-balances go, there's a difference between compromise, and running rough-shod over someone. It's hard to do when one partner is significantly more powerful than the other, but I think Nyn and Lan have done a good job of finding a balance. So have Rand and Avi/Min/Elayne. Unfortunately, those two groups are the only ones. Everyone else is mostly treating their partner like a servant, eg the AS and their Warders. I agree that Egwene and Gawyn fall in this camp, but given that almost everybody in Randland does too, I disagree that their case is anything unusual. Annoying yes, unusual no.

As far as the Egginator herself, in the interest of full disclosure I have to admit that I really liked Egwene when she first became Amyrlin. For a junior wannabe to be dumped into the position of AS leader, in the middle of an AS civil war, on the losing side, and surrounded by the most viperish of all the AS, I think she did a damn fine job of holding her own. Her actions as prisoner in the Tower and the battle against the Seanchan were also a credit to her.

However, her reversal of position on the AS Oaths was one of the single dumbest things that any character has done in the series. Her current opposition to Rand, complete lack of regard for his knowledge or abilities, and determination to "make him see things her way" (which will almost certainly lose the LB for them if she succeeds), have also lost her much of what she gained. Long story short, Egs was awesome when she was kicking AS butt, but as of ToM, her rapid-onset Elaidification now that she's the "real" Amyrlin has severely set her back.