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The whole thing seems to get complicated in a hurry. Joel Send a noteboard - 08/10/2010 07:58:43 PM
Personally I think the problem is overstated so long as you know going into it that you have to address it preemptively, and do so. For example, if one person leaves a group marriage it seems pretty obvious that unless the original home is abusive or unsafe that should be the one with primary custody. That doesn't mean the departing spouse should be cut off the childs life, of course, but I trust you see what I'm saying.

Yes, there would be ways to work things out, but I think you can agree that it would almost invariably be more complicated/take more time/money to settle than a traditional divorce. That'd be alright if only, say, 0.1% of the population engaged in polygamy. But if the numbers swelled too much, it could put a big strain on the legal system. And I feel like it's really difficult to guess how many people would want to practice it - presumably not many, but you can't do as you would with gay marriage and say, "There's always going to be a ceiling of about 10-15%."

I just think it could get really complicated. :P And I don't know that the benefits to society are significant enough to justify those complications.

Also, I have mail for you, but no idea where to send it.

See note!

Which is why, while I can see the appeal on a number of levels, it just seems like it's going to end badly VERY often. I keep thinking of an FML I read a while back where a grown person found out the "family friend" who'd been doing everything with their parents all their lives, even going on family vacations, was actually a third spouse, and everyone in town knew except that person. Nothing like finding out at age 25 that you don't know who your biological father is.

For all that, I don't think it should be illegal; people screw their lives and their childrens up in all sorts of perfectly legal ways. Divide everything by the number of departing spouses instead of automatically dividing by two. Perhaps a little more legal paperwork would be necessary going into it to prevent problems when it fell apart (as, I still maintain, it almost certainly would) but the real problem there is the extent to which we've let personal matters related to marriage bleed into civil laws.
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Polygamy, why is it illegal? - 07/10/2010 03:36:18 AM 1041 Views
THIS IS MINE! *NM* - 07/10/2010 04:10:39 AM 208 Views
Because moralistic idiots - 07/10/2010 05:30:34 AM 431 Views
When potential welfare issues are removed, it's all just a matter of tradition and false morality. - 07/10/2010 05:34:21 AM 449 Views
This explains Friday nights at Gilleys. - 07/10/2010 01:26:37 PM 500 Views
Think of the implications of China's one-child policy in that light - 07/10/2010 01:37:11 PM 423 Views
Joyful and triumphant. - 07/10/2010 01:38:57 PM 499 Views
There's actually a good reason for that. - 07/10/2010 01:37:25 PM 514 Views
*nods* Good point, just like levirate marriage. - 07/10/2010 01:41:11 PM 545 Views
have you ever been to Gilley's on a friday night? - 07/10/2010 05:12:11 PM 429 Views
No. Country music hasn't been produced since the mid-fifties. - 08/10/2010 11:17:27 AM 526 Views
really? I guess that is when they stopped making real rock and roll as well - 08/10/2010 02:33:15 PM 460 Views
Nah, that was the '70s. - 08/10/2010 02:43:09 PM 485 Views
I would assume due to practicality issues and such. - 07/10/2010 07:49:16 AM 521 Views
I have a feeling the ACTUAL reasons are closer to moralistic reasons... - 07/10/2010 12:30:33 PM 467 Views
Yeah, I agree. - 08/10/2010 02:49:16 AM 427 Views
This. - 07/10/2010 05:35:40 PM 441 Views
There's a name I've not seen in a while. - 08/10/2010 11:22:01 AM 514 Views
I think it depends how popular it would become. - 08/10/2010 07:04:03 PM 473 Views
The whole thing seems to get complicated in a hurry. - 08/10/2010 07:58:43 PM 489 Views
I don't think single wife mutiple husband can work - 07/10/2010 05:55:33 PM 432 Views
Oh, it can - 07/10/2010 06:51:59 PM 471 Views
yes but do both of the guys know? - 07/10/2010 07:07:17 PM 481 Views
Oh yes, always have - 08/10/2010 02:53:13 PM 478 Views
Didn't you see Paint Your Wagon? - 07/10/2010 07:21:54 PM 398 Views
Paint Your Wagon was about the California gold rush - 07/10/2010 08:24:24 PM 462 Views
Lol. - 07/10/2010 08:27:14 PM 482 Views
LOVE that movie - 08/10/2010 02:54:30 PM 502 Views
Smart - 08/10/2010 03:28:28 PM 438 Views
Maybe - 08/10/2010 04:41:27 PM 467 Views
I think it can, in certain situations - 07/10/2010 08:29:47 PM 519 Views
the brother thing does make a certain sort of sense - 07/10/2010 08:43:30 PM 475 Views
*shrugs* Mine's working just fine. *NM* - 08/10/2010 02:47:06 AM 188 Views
It does. - 08/10/2010 05:57:46 PM 432 Views
but in most of those cases - 08/10/2010 06:11:15 PM 460 Views
Tradition. - 07/10/2010 01:28:47 PM 374 Views
I don't think it should be illegal - 07/10/2010 02:02:05 PM 482 Views
that would be so sad - 08/10/2010 05:43:32 PM 497 Views
I only see a problem when it is run by a cult and girls are married off at 14 - 07/10/2010 05:18:13 PM 471 Views
You saw an ad. I've seen all the episodes. - 07/10/2010 05:54:33 PM 579 Views
Is it next door? - 08/10/2010 06:05:35 AM 441 Views
Maybe not. - 08/10/2010 06:01:37 PM 415 Views
For the same reasons Americans don't eat horse meat. - 08/10/2010 02:58:24 AM 446 Views
I'm an American and I eat horse meat. *NM* - 08/10/2010 05:19:51 AM 197 Views
Re: I'm an American - 08/10/2010 01:02:23 PM 435 Views
In what society is/was eating horse prevalent? - 08/10/2010 03:10:21 PM 374 Views
it's common in europe now. - 08/10/2010 03:51:07 PM 370 Views
Central Asian cultures. - 08/10/2010 04:43:07 PM 383 Views
Huh? - 08/10/2010 04:41:37 PM 313 Views
so you are saying you are a polygamist - 08/10/2010 05:09:37 PM 372 Views
Dunno. - 08/10/2010 06:06:26 AM 399 Views
At this rate, we'll soon be asking why kids can't have sex with adults. *NM* - 08/10/2010 02:23:16 PM 211 Views
What the heck does that have to do with polygamy? - 08/10/2010 02:57:37 PM 514 Views
and those are only the first steps!!! - 08/10/2010 03:52:14 PM 365 Views
Oh, we should start a bill - 08/10/2010 04:43:05 PM 439 Views
Re: What the heck does that have to do with polygamy? - 13/10/2010 04:22:24 PM 513 Views
Are you calling the age of consent laws illogical? - 13/10/2010 05:36:52 PM 459 Views
Re: Are you calling the age of consent laws illogical? - 13/10/2010 08:16:55 PM 505 Views
I've thought it was because it objectifies women. - 08/10/2010 05:39:54 PM 413 Views

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