I finally got a girlfriend 2 months ago today. She is an awesome woman with a sparkling personality, a great sense of humor, and can actually follow some of the leaps my mind takes during conversation sometimes. I really like her and we get a long fantastically.
The problem is she told me that she loved me last week. I responded by staying quiet for a few minutes and holding her in a loving embrace. Afterward, when we pulled away, I told her how I felt (after she thought started crying, which I didn't...no really, I didn't start crying.)
I told her that it was too soon for me to say it as well. She knows my history with my ex wife and knows that I want to take this relationship slow because I really want it to go somewhere. I told her that I do not take an "I Love You" lightly and I won't say it unless I am sure that I mean it. I know this isn't what she wanted to hear, but THAT is not something I am going to say just to make someone else feel better. It is too important and means to much to be tossed around as some kind of emotional sop.
Tonight, the problem really began...it is something I have been expecting, but haven't been able to figure out how to deal with it. I know she wants me to say it to her, but I won't do it unless I am ready...and at this point, that has changed to 'good and ready'. We were supposed to celebrate a two month anniversary (Ladies, the first anniversary you SHOULD celebrate is 6 months. Anything earlier is just rediculous. FYI) but when she came over, she was distant and a little moody. She left early saying she was in a weird mood. Yet when she got back to her place, she sent me a text telling me that it bothered her.
So I don't know what to do now. It's only been two months, I don't love her but I do care about her. And I know that one person putting oneself out there in a relationship like that does put a strain on the relationship. But I won't say it unless I feel it and mean it. I don't know what else I can do. I have already explained this to her, but it didn't seem to help.
What do I do now?
The problem is she told me that she loved me last week. I responded by staying quiet for a few minutes and holding her in a loving embrace. Afterward, when we pulled away, I told her how I felt (after she thought started crying, which I didn't...no really, I didn't start crying.)
I told her that it was too soon for me to say it as well. She knows my history with my ex wife and knows that I want to take this relationship slow because I really want it to go somewhere. I told her that I do not take an "I Love You" lightly and I won't say it unless I am sure that I mean it. I know this isn't what she wanted to hear, but THAT is not something I am going to say just to make someone else feel better. It is too important and means to much to be tossed around as some kind of emotional sop.
Tonight, the problem really began...it is something I have been expecting, but haven't been able to figure out how to deal with it. I know she wants me to say it to her, but I won't do it unless I am ready...and at this point, that has changed to 'good and ready'. We were supposed to celebrate a two month anniversary (Ladies, the first anniversary you SHOULD celebrate is 6 months. Anything earlier is just rediculous. FYI) but when she came over, she was distant and a little moody. She left early saying she was in a weird mood. Yet when she got back to her place, she sent me a text telling me that it bothered her.
So I don't know what to do now. It's only been two months, I don't love her but I do care about her. And I know that one person putting oneself out there in a relationship like that does put a strain on the relationship. But I won't say it unless I feel it and mean it. I don't know what else I can do. I have already explained this to her, but it didn't seem to help.
What do I do now?
Castle: This is so weird. I dressed up as him for Halloween.
Beckett: Me too.
~When Castle and Beckett met Gene Simmons.
Beckett: Me too.
~When Castle and Beckett met Gene Simmons.
Why do people say it?
- 26/01/2010 08:43:26 AM
972 Views
I totally see what you mean and agree on all accounts
- 26/01/2010 08:53:16 AM
651 Views
The problem isn't them wanting you to say it is them wanting you to prove it
- 26/01/2010 01:54:16 PM
510 Views
If I were you...
- 26/01/2010 02:05:04 PM
597 Views
agreed, although anything "if you X, you would X" should be avoided
- 26/01/2010 03:16:11 PM
496 Views
- 26/01/2010 03:28:59 PM
658 Views
- 26/01/2010 03:28:59 PM
658 Views
I agree 
but we happen to know the day
- 26/01/2010 03:52:20 PM
491 Views
but we happen to know the day
- 26/01/2010 03:52:20 PM
491 Views
I don't find it that odd that it was the boyfriend's idea
- 26/01/2010 04:05:21 PM
543 Views
Not in this case.
- 26/01/2010 09:32:00 PM
546 Views
teenagers are just wierd
- 26/01/2010 11:48:14 PM
531 Views
She's not a teenager.
- 26/01/2010 11:51:06 PM
502 Views
Just tell her what you said in the first paragraph there....
- 26/01/2010 04:57:55 PM
498 Views
It's a good tale of not just that...but of...
- 26/01/2010 05:21:29 PM
498 Views
I have a question.
- 27/01/2010 01:49:18 AM
462 Views
She is 26.
- 27/01/2010 08:22:41 AM
550 Views
Ah. So she wasn't pressuring you. She was just being open about how she was feeling and why she
- 27/01/2010 12:30:01 PM
571 Views