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I hate the high road. Macharius Send a noteboard - 25/03/2010 05:30:19 PM
This paycheque I'm supposed to be dropping over a couple of hundred bucks on a wall unit organizer for her and a bus pass so she can job hunt.


As I recall from your initial post, she felt like she was trapped and such, correct? Maybe she just needs a job to get out of the house on her own, and "re-establishing her identity" will improve her mood to the point where she would be willing to come home again?

I don't know anything that hasn't been posted here, but perhaps some of the reason she claims to be undecided about what to do is she's afraid of what will happen when she does make the choice. I'm about to 110% project myself into this situation, so take warning ( ). If she wants to come home, she could be afraid of the very trust issues you mention yourself as having or afraid that you will use this while things as a kind of emotional blackmail against her later on, or that you'd be so deliberately kind and supportive while she knows you're angry that she couldn't take the stress, or any number of things that you know you'd never do but she in her state considers real and possible.

Maybe you should consider getting "professional help" during this time as well? I did a year and a half ago after a rather rollercoaster eight months, and it helps a lot to have someone not taking sides and able to ask the right questions. At the very least, you could let your feelings go and say what you want to say where it won't bite you in the ass.

Besides, at least you don't have to worry about playing your D&D mage right now, right?
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Taking the high road isn't easy... - 25/03/2010 03:27:47 PM 842 Views
I think the counseling will help, assuming it's with somebody good - 25/03/2010 03:44:47 PM 443 Views
I'm pretty much committed at this point - 25/03/2010 03:50:26 PM 416 Views
I see. - 25/03/2010 04:05:04 PM 416 Views
actually..... - 26/03/2010 05:56:09 AM 409 Views
They live in Canuckistan - 26/03/2010 12:59:59 PM 368 Views
Matters not, but thank you - 26/03/2010 01:48:06 PM 388 Views
Counselling might help - 25/03/2010 03:54:29 PM 382 Views
I hope so too - 25/03/2010 07:03:43 PM 381 Views
Showing your anger isn't necessarily bad if you can do it without really losing your temper... - 25/03/2010 04:24:03 PM 408 Views
Kind of like a bookshelf - 25/03/2010 07:01:03 PM 477 Views
I hate the high road. - 25/03/2010 05:30:19 PM 501 Views
Well, actually she's still running her D&D game - 25/03/2010 07:05:23 PM 408 Views
Wow... - 25/03/2010 07:25:53 PM 409 Views
Re: Well, actually she's still running her D&D game - 25/03/2010 07:26:47 PM 401 Views
Apparently I don't play any of the 'power builds' from it - 25/03/2010 07:59:59 PM 524 Views
Venting is good - 25/03/2010 05:40:50 PM 406 Views
Well, I'm doing my best - 25/03/2010 07:07:28 PM 374 Views
The high road sucks but you get less shit on your shoes - 25/03/2010 05:46:33 PM 402 Views
Thank you. It's really not a lot of fun - - 25/03/2010 07:09:40 PM 373 Views
The high road certainly isn't easy. - 25/03/2010 07:42:47 PM 442 Views
You know...we're not close & we frequently do not get along.... - 25/03/2010 07:57:01 PM 507 Views
This. *NM* - 25/03/2010 08:00:40 PM 150 Views
Sounds like good advice (says the guy without kids ) *NM* - 25/03/2010 08:48:27 PM 152 Views
Thanks Jeo - 25/03/2010 08:58:37 PM 389 Views
/me hugs I love Rafolites. *NM* - 25/03/2010 11:11:39 PM 158 Views
*hugses* - 25/03/2010 08:56:36 PM 375 Views
I'm sure I don't have to tell you this - 25/03/2010 09:18:31 PM 366 Views
Make sure you keep records of the money you give her and the clothes you buy. - 25/03/2010 09:34:49 PM 389 Views
Lord I hope it doesn't come to that. - 25/03/2010 11:58:35 PM 404 Views
I told you. Medication. - 25/03/2010 10:04:11 PM 396 Views
I have to Agree, I think your wife needs psyche help, and medical help. - 25/03/2010 11:13:48 PM 388 Views
let's assume, for the sake of discussion... - 26/03/2010 03:59:25 AM 490 Views
ugh...stupid double post *NM* - 26/03/2010 03:59:45 AM 159 Views
Can I offer a suggestion for dealign with the anger? - 26/03/2010 04:45:37 AM 391 Views
Have you considered Domestic Violence? *NM* - 26/03/2010 06:02:43 AM 181 Views
Naturally not. - 26/03/2010 01:50:27 PM 391 Views
i can't really add anything that hasn't been said before - 26/03/2010 06:10:47 AM 380 Views
:/ *hugs* *NM* - 30/03/2010 02:11:24 PM 161 Views

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