Only most of the time Rand knows that's what he's doing, he just sees it something that needs done, and beats himself up over it later.

With Egwene... Most of the time she ether sees it as only right, as their fault in the first place, or she just plane doesn't even get why their upset.

There's a difference between "circumstances demanded it" and "just doesn't really get what the word "friend" means", and Most of the time Egwene's view of "friend" is "whoever is most useful to me at the time".