Who inspire almost no fear at all. The other Forsaken, Rand and others like Brigitte just remark that she is a clever manipulator. But no one fears her, like Demandred or Semirhage for example. And that is precisely what Graendal wants by her flamboyant and over the top behaviour & appearance.

Asmo's reaction doesn't fit at all with seeing Graendal. And that Graendal would confront Asmo and immediately kill him, also doesn't fit at all with what we know about her: Graendal wouldn't risk to go to Caemlyn in the first place, and if she went their, only with a disguise, and if she met Asmo, she would use Compulsion on him to gather informations or use him as a tool, not kill him.

But it's anyway moot, because TGS made even more clear that Graendal wasn't Asmo's killer. Otherwise BS could have revealed it in her last PoV.