Active Users:365 Time:07/12/2024 02:25:29 PM
ROTFLWBGOMF *NM* aliena - 30/04/2004 07:13:35 PM

The following are possible product warnings that might be required on a package of any and every product, based on the laws of physics:





WARNING: This Product Warps Space and Time in Its Vicinity.



WARNING: This Product Attracts Every Other Piece of Matter in the universe,Including the Products of Other Manufacturers, with a Force Proportional to the Product of the Masses and Inversely Proportional to the Distance Between Them.



CAUTION: The Mass of This Product Contains the Energy Equivalent of 85 Million Tons of TNT per Net Ounce of Weight.



HANDLE WITH EXTREME CARE: This Product Contains Minute Electrically Charged Particles Moving at Velocities in Excess of Five Hundred Million Miles Per Hour.



CONSUMER NOTICE: Because of the "Uncertainty Principle," It Is Impossible for the Consumer to Find Out at the Same Time Both Precisely Where This Product Is and How Fast It Is Moving.



ADVISORY: There is an Extremely Small but Nonzero Chance That, Through a Process Know as "Tunneling," This Product May Spontaneously Disappear from Its Present Location and Reappear at Any Random Place in the Universe, Including Your Neighbor's Domicile. The Manufacturer Will Not Be Responsible for Any Damages or Inconvenience That May Result.



READ THIS BEFORE OPENING PACKAGE: According to Certain Suggested Versions of the Grand Unified Theory, the Primary Particles Constituting this Product May Decay to Nothingness Within the Next Four Hundred Million Years.



THIS IS A 100% MATTER PRODUCT: In the Unlikely Event That This Merchandise Should Contact Antimatter in Any Form, a Catastrophic Explosion Will Result.



PUBLIC NOTICE AS REQUIRED BY LAW: Any Use of This Product, in Any Manner Whatsoever, Will Increase the Amount of Disorder in the Universe. Although No Liability Is Implied Herein, the Consumer Is Warned That This Process Will Ultimately Lead to the Heat Death of the Universe.



NOTE: The Most Fundamental Particles in This Product Are Held Together by a "Gluing" Force About Which Little is Currently Known and Whose Adhesive Power Can Therefore Not Be Permanently Guaranteed.



ATTENTION: Despite Any Other Listing of Product Contents Found Hereon, the Consumer is Advised That, in Actuality, This Product Consists Of 99.9999999999% Empty Space.



NEW GRAND UNIFIED THEORY DISCLAIMER: The Manufacturer May Technically Be Entitled to Claim That This Product Is Ten-Dimensional. However, the Consumer Is Reminded That This Confers No Legal Rights Above and Beyond Those Applicable to Three-Dimensional Objects.



PLEASE NOTE: Some Quantum Physics Theories Suggest That When the Consumer Is Not Directly Observing This Product, It May Cease to Exist or Will Exist Only in a Vague and Undetermined State.



COMPONENT EQUIVALENCY NOTICE: The Subatomic Particles (Electrons, Protons,etc.) Comprising This Product Are Exactly the Same in Every Measurable Respect as Those Used in the Products of Other Manufacturers, and No Claim to the Contrary May Legitimately Be Expressed or Implied.



HEALTH WARNING: Care Should Be Taken When Lifting This Product, Since Its Mass,and Thus Its Weight, Is Dependent on Its Velocity Relative to the User.



IMPORTANT NOTICE TO PURCHASERS: The Entire Physical Universe, Including This Product, May One Day Collapse Back into an Infinitesimally Small Space. Should Another Universe Subsequently Re-emerge, the Existence of This Product in That Universe Cannot Be Guaranteed.


Rainbow Ajah
Bonded toMuir&Jed&DW&xxxdec21xxx




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10 Mistake Women make with Men - 30/04/2004 02:57:42 PM 253 Views
hmm... - 30/04/2004 03:21:36 PM 30 Views
A little bitter, are we? - 30/04/2004 03:58:35 PM 29 Views
not all women do that - 30/04/2004 04:16:23 PM 39 Views
That's awesome-- I personally feel that it's abused women - 30/04/2004 04:28:53 PM 32 Views
this is pure bs. *NM* - 30/04/2004 04:31:56 PM 10 Views
What planet do you live on? I want to go there. *NM* - 30/04/2004 04:41:31 PM 6 Views
alright - 30/04/2004 05:07:04 PM 47 Views
I want to meet a woman who can hold a conversation. - 30/04/2004 05:34:12 PM 33 Views
well what are you trying to talk to her about? *NM* - 30/04/2004 05:36:34 PM 4 Views
Physics... *NM* - 30/04/2004 05:37:08 PM 5 Views
LOL - 30/04/2004 05:54:08 PM 32 Views
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New Element - 30/04/2004 07:01:45 PM 13 Views
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Some friends - 10/05/2004 04:11:47 PM 6 Views
Hahahahaha. - 10/05/2004 06:38:18 PM 4 Views
ROTFLWBGOMF *NM* - 30/04/2004 07:13:35 PM 3 Views
zzzz- oh, im sorry, what were we talking about? - 30/04/2004 06:32:45 PM 10 Views
I tend to find - 30/04/2004 07:22:50 PM 14 Views
A little bit bitter perhaps? - 30/04/2004 05:35:22 PM 14 Views
Damn, what kind of women are you hanging around? - 30/04/2004 05:48:13 PM 11 Views
Way to make stereotype there... - 30/04/2004 06:23:18 PM 11 Views
I'm sure this has been posted before - 30/04/2004 07:31:17 PM 11 Views
If I wasn't a good woman I might be offended - 30/04/2004 07:49:22 PM 13 Views
As people have said, bullsh*t. Those are ridiculous generalizations. - 30/04/2004 08:34:55 PM 15 Views
Nice to hear your opinion and all, but... - 01/05/2004 06:18:19 AM 8 Views
What I look for in a woman - 01/05/2004 07:41:59 AM 11 Views
Is this a cyclic thing you do, huh? - 01/05/2004 07:57:58 AM 13 Views
Who is Tor Books? - 01/05/2004 11:04:30 AM 12 Views
Hmm...*looks academic* - 01/05/2004 09:54:14 PM 9 Views