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Well... Larry Send a noteboard - 09/09/2012 10:57:25 PM
I reluctantly agreed to read two D&D trilogies (Dragonlance: Legends and Forgotten Realms: Icewind Dale) and to give my thoughts in sonnet form. Below is what I composed based off of only reading the blurbs:

Wait, did you agree to read two trilogies and then base your review on the blurbs? What kind of grade would you give your students if you found out they did that? ;)


No. That was the dedicatory sonnet, D&D #1. There shall be at least two more xx(

Let us not to the marriage of true minds

Admit poor D&D, love is not love

Which alters when Forgotten Realms it finds,

Or bends with the Dragonlance to remove.

O no, it is an ever fixèd mark

No mock sonnet would be complete without one of those mis-stressed past participles. Good thinking.


Or the ripping off of Shakespeare's Sonnet #116? ;)

That looks on fell Drizzt and is n'er shaken;

He is the fearsome Elf that is so Dark,

Whose sword rings chill; his measure never taken.

Love's not time's fool, though Crysania be meek

In her love for Raistlin Majere shall bloom,

Love alters not with a brief hour or week,

But bears it out even to prophetic doom:

If this be error and upon me proved,

I never writ, nor no woman so loved.

Bravo! A true masterpiece! :P


Wait a few days for the others, then judge ;)

There will be at least two more of these in the coming weeks. How these are popular with so many is what I am trying to understand.

I haven't read much of them, only a few Dragonlance books. I guess a lot of people like not going outside their comfort zone, and so they stick with what they know? The original Dragonlance trilogy wasn't exactly the pinnacle of fantasy writing, the amazing part is how they then added dozens of other books, most written by other and utterly unknown authors, and somehow kept managing to sell them. And as for Icewind Dale and the other Forgotten Realms books, I'm inclined to say they're much better as computer (or tabletop, of course) games than as books. Haven't played Icewind Dale itself, but I've played other games set in that world - it's an interesting enough world, and some of the games they made in it are masterpieces. But even in that genre of fantasy that relies heavily on worldbuilding and that you're not a fan of, worldbuilding is still only one element and it still takes good writing to make the novel more than fan fiction set in the universe in question.


Well, I was thinking more about why any would have read any such in the first place :P The writing is putrid, to say the least, regardless of the rationales involved ;)
Illusions fall like the husk of a fruit, one after another, and the fruit is experience. - Narrator, Sylvie

Je suis méchant.
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This may be one of the most dire reviews you shall ever read - 09/09/2012 09:12:25 PM 1971 Views
Certainly one of the most original, you get points for that. - 09/09/2012 10:39:00 PM 1233 Views
Well... - 09/09/2012 10:57:25 PM 1227 Views
A review of a D&D bestiary could be more dire. - 09/09/2012 11:29:17 PM 1090 Views
Perhaps - 09/09/2012 11:50:20 PM 1190 Views
Hey now. Owlbears are awesome. - 11/09/2012 02:35:28 AM 1377 Views
That page is painful to behold - 11/09/2012 03:09:29 AM 1221 Views
They are popular as they are fun, easy reading books - 10/09/2012 12:11:24 AM 1169 Views
"Popular", "Fun," and "Easy" doesn't have to be equated with poorly-written - 10/09/2012 12:16:27 AM 1315 Views
Poorly written by what standard? - 10/09/2012 12:29:17 AM 1247 Views
By the standards of what I enjoyed as a nine year-old? - 10/09/2012 01:04:12 AM 1207 Views
So like I said, by the standards of Elitist Literary Snobs - 11/09/2012 12:03:08 AM 1311 Views
Nice attempt at sophistry, but alas, it fails - 11/09/2012 12:38:24 AM 1190 Views
Was that meant to make any sense? - 11/09/2012 01:43:13 AM 1328 Views
Re: Was that meant to make any sense? - 11/09/2012 01:54:23 AM 1213 Views
I'm with Wibble on this (big surprise) - 12/09/2012 03:07:53 PM 1317 Views
Heh. - 12/09/2012 03:43:52 PM 1334 Views
Pretty much so - 12/09/2012 04:19:35 PM 1331 Views
When did you put up that header? - 12/09/2012 04:35:20 PM 1225 Views
I didn't put it up - 12/09/2012 04:51:32 PM 1120 Views
I shall tread lightly so. - 12/09/2012 06:15:51 PM 1261 Views
- 12/09/2012 07:25:29 PM 1111 Views
+6 health? What game are you playing? - 12/09/2012 07:52:52 PM 1142 Views
The Game of Life? - 12/09/2012 08:23:53 PM 1239 Views
Re: Pretty much so - 12/09/2012 08:50:57 PM 1233 Views
You apparently do not read my blog/reviews much - 12/09/2012 09:07:18 PM 1259 Views
Actually, I read them almost never - 13/09/2012 03:07:48 PM 1303 Views
I think my IQ dropped a little bit when I parsed what you said - 13/09/2012 04:16:21 PM 1254 Views
Yep, your usual rebuttal... *NM* - 17/09/2012 02:14:56 PM 620 Views
No, not really - 17/09/2012 06:25:15 PM 1091 Views
Yes, Yes, wrap yourself in arrogance and declare yourself correct until your opposite gets bored... - 17/09/2012 11:12:17 PM 1382 Views
Nah, I just wipe my ass with arrogance - 18/09/2012 12:23:44 AM 1560 Views
The last word with me is rather difficult to obtain - 18/09/2012 02:48:03 PM 1152 Views
Don't try to argue with them. They've made their judgments. They are better than you. - 10/09/2012 09:36:17 PM 1225 Views
Defensive much? *NM* - 10/09/2012 10:31:17 PM 672 Views
He never said you couldn't enjoy it. - 10/09/2012 11:10:11 PM 1354 Views
Indeed - 10/09/2012 11:17:20 PM 1205 Views
But they aren't. - 10/09/2012 11:48:14 PM 1251 Views
Prove it. *NM* - 11/09/2012 03:12:17 AM 605 Views
He also went on to compare liking the books to having the standards of a nine-year-old. - 11/09/2012 02:34:18 AM 1207 Views
You didn't read what I said very well then - 11/09/2012 03:16:21 AM 1226 Views
I believe that they were not meant for adults. - 10/09/2012 12:30:05 AM 1209 Views
Basically, both get dubious kudos for trying something new by the dire standards of the day. - 10/09/2012 11:38:22 PM 1220 Views
Interesting point - 11/09/2012 12:41:01 AM 1168 Views
Are you aware of the game's alignment rules? Some of the novels struggle with this. - 12/09/2012 10:58:37 PM 1192 Views
Not aware of it at all until now - 12/09/2012 11:18:57 PM 1200 Views
How is that possible? - 12/09/2012 11:28:33 PM 1128 Views
My dad was (and is) influenced by Evangelicals - 13/09/2012 12:17:36 AM 1104 Views
Wait, so you didn't read the Chronicles first? - 13/09/2012 02:12:13 PM 1099 Views
No - 13/09/2012 02:18:03 PM 1171 Views
Well, it's sort of like starting Jordan at Lord of Chaos - 13/09/2012 05:18:23 PM 1168 Views
Oddly enough, I started WoT at CoS in November 1997 - 13/09/2012 05:56:04 PM 1121 Views
Chronicles is considerably weaker - 13/09/2012 11:14:38 PM 1197 Views
12 modules, not 15 - 14/09/2012 02:55:39 PM 1337 Views
These threads are so much better than the rape threads! *NM* - 12/09/2012 04:03:01 AM 689 Views
You're just waiting to see if I'll use hexameter in the next one *NM* - 12/09/2012 04:32:31 AM 540 Views
When do we get to see some alexandrines? *NM* - 12/09/2012 12:41:29 PM 629 Views
Or quatrains? - 12/09/2012 03:25:13 PM 1092 Views
At least you didn't read the Baldur's Gate novelizations - 14/09/2012 04:29:17 AM 1121 Views
Sssssh! - 14/09/2012 05:10:19 AM 1180 Views
People become lesbians for no reason! - 17/09/2012 04:34:20 PM 1046 Views
I think my IQ dropped further upon learning of this - 17/09/2012 06:29:29 PM 1090 Views
Baldurs Gate wooooo! - 14/09/2012 04:13:34 PM 1224 Views
Is the review dire because of the subject or the sonnet form? - 14/09/2012 04:24:37 PM 1154 Views
Both - 14/09/2012 04:36:59 PM 1135 Views
it would be unusual for someone to just randomly pick books like that up - 14/09/2012 05:05:37 PM 1399 Views
Interesting scenario - 14/09/2012 10:16:11 PM 1159 Views
Re: Interesting scenario - 15/09/2012 09:55:59 AM 1344 Views
Re: Interesting scenario - 17/09/2012 06:28:57 PM 1089 Views

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