a woman or women who is not his spouse. But does that constitute mental cheating? I don't know that it does. If I read a story about a child molester and think to myself he should be put to death for his crime did I murder mentally? I think thinking is just that - thinking. It is not actually acting and so while all men might sooner or later think sexually about someone other than a mate I don't think it is a big deal; it just seems to be something we do. It seems to be a part of "maleness".
It might be said that true lusting in one's mind is somethign a little deeper and might be indicative of something akin to cheating mentally. By lusting I mean the constant repeat focused attention on sexually thinking about another person other than a man's spouse.
However all of that works out I want to say this about evolution. Evolution and (my field) psychology may tell us how we often appear to act but it does not tell us how we must act. Probably the most essential part of being human is our ability to change our mind and thus our course of action. While certain sexual practices such as cheating may have evolved in a psychological paradigm that increases our (males' chances of passing on genes it is also safe to say that we are continuing to evolve and that falling back on the old "evolution made me do it" excuse is pretty lame.
So, men might have some kind of evolutionary urge to cheat but it doesn't mean we have to and it doesn't mean we should.
It might be said that true lusting in one's mind is somethign a little deeper and might be indicative of something akin to cheating mentally. By lusting I mean the constant repeat focused attention on sexually thinking about another person other than a man's spouse.
However all of that works out I want to say this about evolution. Evolution and (my field) psychology may tell us how we often appear to act but it does not tell us how we must act. Probably the most essential part of being human is our ability to change our mind and thus our course of action. While certain sexual practices such as cheating may have evolved in a psychological paradigm that increases our (males' chances of passing on genes it is also safe to say that we are continuing to evolve and that falling back on the old "evolution made me do it" excuse is pretty lame.
So, men might have some kind of evolutionary urge to cheat but it doesn't mean we have to and it doesn't mean we should.
"We feel safe when we read what we recognise, what does not challenge our way of thinking.... a steady acceptance of pre-arranged patterns leads to the inability to question what we are told."
~Camilla
Ghavrel is Ghavrel is Ghavrel
*MySmiley*
~Camilla
Ghavrel is Ghavrel is Ghavrel
*MySmiley*
Do All Men Cheat?
29/07/2010 09:03:09 PM
- 1403 Views
Is it just me, or does the paying kind of make her something else than a "mistress"?
29/07/2010 09:30:56 PM
- 967 Views
Her "100%" claim was ambiguous in the worst possible way.
29/07/2010 10:21:13 PM
- 926 Views
I dunno, there's really only one interpretation that makes sense.
29/07/2010 10:29:48 PM
- 1003 Views
Well, gay men have had the reputation for being exceptionally promiscuous, so don't discount them. *NM*
30/07/2010 09:33:45 AM
- 519 Views
She's right about one thing:
29/07/2010 09:37:38 PM
- 992 Views
That's true
30/07/2010 12:27:02 AM
- 754 Views
I think that's a lie designed to make men who do cheat in their minds feel better about it.
30/07/2010 12:41:48 AM
- 1118 Views
Are you talking about gay and asexual men?
30/07/2010 12:44:44 AM
- 848 Views
I think we're not understanding each other here.
30/07/2010 12:47:09 AM
- 1032 Views
Sorry darlin you just don't know what it's like to be a man
30/07/2010 01:21:48 AM
- 920 Views
apparently being a man includes condescending.
30/07/2010 01:28:20 AM
- 762 Views
You don't think we talk? I'm not just puffing gas here
30/07/2010 02:04:59 AM
- 927 Views
i'm just trying to say that totally discounting what she was saying was rude
30/07/2010 02:16:03 AM
- 1028 Views
You don't think that a woman can have a completely honest conversation with a man?
30/07/2010 08:49:21 AM
- 1002 Views
It's a stereotype based on pretty solid biological evidence, though.
30/07/2010 09:10:30 AM
- 893 Views
No offense, but that post is rather useless as long as you don't define "sexual thoughts".
30/07/2010 09:54:37 AM
- 1182 Views
Regardless of what you and your friends do or say, it's not true of all men.
30/07/2010 05:51:49 PM
- 943 Views
"mentally monogamous" is one of the stupidest expressions I've ever heard. i can't even comment. *NM*
30/07/2010 04:56:15 PM
- 693 Views
Every man can't cheat every day, because not every man is in a relationship *NM*
31/07/2010 07:54:31 AM
- 409 Views
I love my husband.
29/07/2010 09:44:51 PM
- 955 Views
Be thankful you can't read his mind. Ignorance is bliss *NM*
29/07/2010 10:17:38 PM
- 422 Views
29/07/2010 10:33:08 PM
- 736 Views
You mean like one would appreciate fine art? Nothing sexual about that *NM*
29/07/2010 10:35:35 PM
- 445 Views
Heh.
29/07/2010 10:41:34 PM
- 818 Views
Would you honestly get upset at him for that?
30/07/2010 08:39:50 PM
- 844 Views
Hmm
29/07/2010 10:45:48 PM
- 1000 Views
I totally know that i was just using it to start a conversation
29/07/2010 10:49:05 PM
- 736 Views
Biologically designed....
30/07/2010 03:54:00 AM
- 901 Views
Bastard...
03/08/2010 09:52:41 AM
- 923 Views
I feel confident in saying that all men think mentally at somepoint in a sexual way toward...
30/07/2010 07:06:57 AM
- 915 Views
This. *NM*
30/07/2010 09:11:17 AM
- 492 Views
one major porblem with this whole thing
30/07/2010 08:33:18 PM
- 766 Views
That's the exact point, she'll get skewed results due to the self selected nature of her study group
31/07/2010 08:02:54 AM
- 889 Views
"Don't let yourself go — there is nothing less valued than a commodity that no one else wants"
31/07/2010 09:52:29 AM
- 1068 Views
having reread this article, theres's actually very little that i disagree with *NM*
31/07/2010 10:04:43 AM
- 561 Views