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Re: I dunno. nossy Send a noteboard - 29/10/2010 05:11:59 PM
It sounds to me like your roomie is getting something out of the arrangement too, though I don't know what. Taking the key is such an obvious solution, and the "but I don't want to upset him" reason for not doing it only goes as far as roomie's willingness/ability to accept the continued behavior (which includes not being bothered by it). Those are the only 2 places where roomie has control to exercise.

Not alienating his father seems to be what he's getting out of it. He isn't the most self-sure person out there, so I think part of the problem is that he doesn't feel comfortable making a definitive stance. He's too nice, and really laid back.

It's possible there's a compromise position somewhere. Maybe Dad can still come over and clean once a week, and you guys get an extra lock that Dad doesn't have a key for that you just leave unlocked on that one, agreed-upon day per week. That way roomie still gets whatever he's getting out of the deal, and dad still gets to come "help", but roomie has control over when and how often.

That's a pretty obvious statement. "You're too crazy to come over with full access, so here's your only option." It's still offensive, which is what roommate has been trying to find a way around. Doesn't seem that there is one.
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Does anyone understand co-dependency? nossy - 29/10/2010 03:59:52 PM 761 Views
That's almost.... creepy. Mats Gambling Buddy - 29/10/2010 04:12:50 PM 485 Views
Almost? nossy - 29/10/2010 04:45:41 PM 494 Views
It sounds like the man may have some OCD cleaning problems as well. Macharius - 29/10/2010 04:13:28 PM 497 Views
I definitely think so. nossy - 29/10/2010 05:08:01 PM 489 Views
Re: I definitely think so. Macharius - 29/10/2010 06:17:51 PM 483 Views
I dunno. Sareitha Sedai - 29/10/2010 04:26:19 PM 547 Views
Re: I dunno. nossy - 29/10/2010 05:11:59 PM 517 Views
I don't think it's offensive. Sareitha Sedai - 29/10/2010 05:19:03 PM 496 Views
well..even if it isn't offensive by nature, his dad will probably still be offended LadyLorraine - 29/10/2010 05:25:54 PM 490 Views
Of course he will. Sareitha Sedai - 29/10/2010 05:37:08 PM 502 Views
Um... I disagree with "what he's gettingout of it". Avendesora - 30/10/2010 12:48:56 PM 473 Views
and if one wants a father, rather than a free maid? nossy - 30/10/2010 03:00:03 PM 537 Views
He can make sure the place is clean before the father shows up. Avendesora - 30/10/2010 03:25:40 PM 481 Views
I honestly think SilverWarder - 29/10/2010 05:12:09 PM 486 Views
I'd also say just take the key, but that's just me. LadyLorraine - 29/10/2010 05:16:17 PM 475 Views
Why does he have a key? BlackAdder - 29/10/2010 05:23:50 PM 423 Views
The father needs to find his own drive, but you probably aren't the one to fix that. *NM* Zalis - 29/10/2010 06:11:57 PM 255 Views
Does he do the dishes and clean the bathrooms? Vodalus - 29/10/2010 06:54:07 PM 471 Views
Tell your roomate to sh*t or get off the pot ßelals Girl - 29/10/2010 07:37:35 PM 460 Views
that sounds, er, nice and all nossy - 30/10/2010 03:07:06 PM 544 Views
sorry, but it sounds like the time for "niceness" has long passed ßelals Girl - 30/10/2010 07:28:56 PM 549 Views
Give him my address and everyone wins. Joel - 30/10/2010 10:25:30 AM 507 Views
I totally agree with Ave... damookster - 30/10/2010 11:52:08 PM 536 Views
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