If someone punches a guy in the nose because he is going around telling everyone that his sister blew the whole football team should the one who threw the first punch be the only on punished? It will probably be impossible for the brother to prove that is what happened. Bullying isn't only about throwing punches. It isn't that hard to verbally instigate a thirteen year old boy into throwing a punch. For the victim four days of suspension is worth it to stop the bullying but will it worth it to the bully? Punish them both and you can be sure you punished the bully which is what needs to happen if you want to stop it.