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If they're not close enough to invite to the reception, are they really needed at the ceremony? Vivien Send a noteboard - 15/12/2011 08:18:18 PM
Another thing: are their invitations different- is there any indication that they're not going to be invited to a dinner? For one thing, they should be told so that they eat beforehand and for another thing, wouldn't it affect their expected gift obligation?

But if it's normal in NZ I amagine people are used to it and act accordingly, I'm just kind of curious how it all works out.

Invite everyone you want to the service and provide finger-food refreshments afterwards. This way all the people you want to be there, as well as those who are less close, can share the ceremony with you.

Then the closest people - relations of a certain age, special relations, close friends, etc - are invited to an evening dinner, maybe with a dance afterwards.

Some people will invite a select few for dinner, and then do the rest of the above, inviting everyone to a dance with a cash bar. That's quite normal in NZ, actually. Most weddings I've been to do something like that.
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So it turns out that weddings are expensive... Dannymac - 12/12/2011 04:24:17 PM 1844 Views
I am looking to drop about a grand on my son's rehearsal dinner *NM* random thoughts - 12/12/2011 04:42:53 PM 488 Views
Well, part of it is that the rehearsal dinner isn't on the $5k budget. Dannymac - 12/12/2011 04:46:30 PM 839 Views
It is avoidable, but people will treat you like you're a nutcase if you don't do most of the things nossy - 12/12/2011 05:02:14 PM 880 Views
my first wedding was in church with a pretty dress and a preacher random thoughts - 12/12/2011 06:12:02 PM 822 Views
We had a pretty dress and a notary public in the courtyard of the B&B. nossy - 12/12/2011 09:36:52 PM 869 Views
If I had it to all over again I would have formed a Rock Band and dated supermodels *NM* random thoughts - 13/12/2011 04:20:28 PM 455 Views
*NM* TaskmasterJack - 22/12/2011 10:15:04 PM 458 Views
Heh. Nate - 12/12/2011 05:29:19 PM 964 Views
Re: Heh. Macharius - 12/12/2011 06:02:44 PM 868 Views
Re: Heh. Nate - 12/12/2011 06:44:30 PM 1002 Views
Re: Heh. Macharius - 12/12/2011 07:27:16 PM 955 Views
We kept it to about $5000 also (including cost of rings). Macharius - 12/12/2011 06:06:54 PM 882 Views
I would say our wedding was about that. Lici - 12/12/2011 06:45:46 PM 1061 Views
I feel like they only have to be expensive if you let them be. LadyLorraine - 12/12/2011 07:07:59 PM 929 Views
I got married two weeks ago for less than that. Aemon - 12/12/2011 09:56:43 PM 984 Views
Congrats Sareitha Sedai - 12/12/2011 10:03:35 PM 839 Views
Thanks! Aemon - 13/12/2011 02:53:11 PM 843 Views
You've been holding out on us. Congratulations. *NM* TaskmasterJack - 13/12/2011 12:02:39 AM 507 Views
Honestly, I didn't think anyone would care. Aemon - 13/12/2011 03:08:44 PM 813 Views
Hey! No announcement??? Congratulations and may you find many years of happiness! *NM* everynametaken - 13/12/2011 03:27:51 AM 535 Views
No, no announcement. I'm not really the center-of-attention type. haha Thanks though! *NM* Aemon - 13/12/2011 03:10:29 PM 457 Views
Congratulations, my friend. Jacob - 13/12/2011 03:21:22 PM 781 Views
Thanks. Aemon - 13/12/2011 06:38:59 PM 885 Views
Acceptable... Jacob - 13/12/2011 06:40:29 PM 809 Views
OMG! Congratulations! Danu - 14/12/2011 10:43:05 PM 819 Views
Thanks Danu. *NM* Aemon - 15/12/2011 11:08:51 PM 460 Views
i had 500 people at my wedding....... Aisha - 13/12/2011 12:05:38 AM 996 Views
Everybody I have ever talked to that had a big, expensive wedding has told me that in hindsight... everynametaken - 13/12/2011 03:29:34 AM 784 Views
Yes they are. We're planning ours and... callandor1000 - 13/12/2011 02:19:42 AM 893 Views
Some people just don't seem to think outside of the box ironclad - 13/12/2011 09:15:49 AM 965 Views
And several items on that chart are soo unnecessary *NM* ironclad - 13/12/2011 09:41:10 AM 485 Views
They're only as expensive as you make them. Tim - 14/12/2011 10:38:37 AM 803 Views
I'm so glad we went simple. Kaldric - 14/12/2011 03:08:45 PM 954 Views
As someone who had a smaller wedding than was expected by certain people... Danu - 14/12/2011 10:36:57 PM 930 Views
These seem kind of extreme. Vivien - 15/12/2011 06:03:15 AM 941 Views
because of your history you might find a cash bar lame... LadyLorraine - 15/12/2011 12:59:39 PM 981 Views
Not my personal history, but culture. Vivien - 15/12/2011 03:53:12 PM 938 Views
I agree that there are better cuts to make than refreshments LadyLorraine - 15/12/2011 04:35:13 PM 928 Views
Re: because of your history you might find a cash bar lame... callandor1000 - 22/12/2011 01:08:00 PM 939 Views
Yeah, and that's why Russians are all dying of alcoholism. *NM* Macharius - 15/12/2011 01:46:52 PM 498 Views
You don't have to be an alcoholic to prefer not to have a cash bar at a party. Vivien - 15/12/2011 03:37:15 PM 840 Views
It is lame to expect the father of the bride to shell out tens of thousands for a party random thoughts - 15/12/2011 02:00:54 PM 950 Views
seriously. who cares if people think you're "cheap". LadyLorraine - 15/12/2011 04:41:33 PM 854 Views
What my family tends to do (because it's huge) is this: Rebekah - 15/12/2011 02:16:31 PM 992 Views
That's what most German weddings do too. Reasonable. *NM* ironclad - 15/12/2011 03:38:40 PM 452 Views
If they're not close enough to invite to the reception, are they really needed at the ceremony? Vivien - 15/12/2011 08:18:18 PM 952 Views
In most cases, a church ceremony tends to be an open thing. Anyone can come. Rebekah - 15/12/2011 10:11:30 PM 966 Views
Apparently it's becoming more common over here to do weddings on a weekday. Rebekah - 15/12/2011 02:13:57 PM 832 Views
I can't imagine someone in America announcing their wedding was on a weekday. TaskmasterJack - 15/12/2011 10:07:55 PM 1074 Views
People not in America have way more vacation days... *NM* Vivien - 15/12/2011 11:56:22 PM 451 Views
That was part of the logic in my thinking, yes. *NM* TaskmasterJack - 16/12/2011 12:46:53 AM 432 Views
Fridays are actually becoming more common. Sareitha Sedai - 16/12/2011 04:51:41 PM 781 Views
Why does the band get more than the photographer? Amyrlin - 16/12/2011 04:30:29 PM 756 Views
well they do have to split it 4 or 5 ways random thoughts - 16/12/2011 04:38:36 PM 844 Views
The thing is... it's NOT a night's work. Amyrlin - 16/12/2011 09:27:30 PM 1139 Views
Because if you put tiny plastic musical instruments on all the tables, your ears will bleed out. TaskmasterJack - 16/12/2011 10:04:59 PM 1204 Views
My advice based on what I've done so far. callandor1000 - 22/12/2011 01:27:29 PM 810 Views
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