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I think i see what you are talking about, thanks. *NM* Blaine Send a noteboard - 14/12/2009 07:05:04 AM
Also, your conception of 1950s marriage is fairly caricatured. Although the topic of your paper suggests you realize that, you should acknowledge it.
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What do you think of this intro? Blaine - 14/12/2009 06:14:51 AM 901 Views
I'm not a fan of the first two sentences. Brian - 14/12/2009 06:42:10 AM 645 Views
Well, i know for a fact that he doesn't opening with questions Blaine - 14/12/2009 07:02:03 AM 796 Views
Ahhh, one of those professors. Brian - 14/12/2009 07:22:46 AM 619 Views
Being sneaky, hmmm. I like this idea. *NM* Blaine - 14/12/2009 07:59:39 AM 323 Views
Sentence fragments are unacceptable in technical writing. You need to fix that. Ghavrel - 14/12/2009 06:51:05 AM 628 Views
I think i see what you are talking about, thanks. *NM* Blaine - 14/12/2009 07:05:04 AM 327 Views
It's like a Pleasentville film review. *NM* AgentOrange - 14/12/2009 09:54:14 AM 260 Views
I actually mention it a few times later. *NM* Blaine - 14/12/2009 08:48:11 PM 335 Views
I want to stick a wikipedia-style "who?" in there. Tim - 14/12/2009 10:53:02 AM 616 Views
That's actually how we're taught to write in American high schools... Lupine - 14/12/2009 02:39:56 PM 618 Views
Part of my problem is that he hasn't told me what level this is for. Tim - 14/12/2009 03:04:40 PM 594 Views
Aye, but it's an intro. Rebekah - 15/12/2009 08:07:38 AM 566 Views
References should come at the first mention of whatever it is. *NM* Tim - 15/12/2009 08:42:27 AM 255 Views
You presume correctly Blaine - 15/12/2009 02:19:07 PM 685 Views
It's simply an introduction, my citations and stuff come in a little later. *NM* Blaine - 14/12/2009 08:49:15 PM 333 Views
I smell a strawman... Tashmere - 15/12/2009 02:25:36 AM 624 Views
well it was in response to a prompt which stated people call it the "Golden Age". My hands were tied *NM* Blaine - 15/12/2009 02:20:54 PM 301 Views
Stylistically it needs a lot of work. Tom - 15/12/2009 03:28:24 AM 691 Views
Hell, with a critique like that I may start putting up my introductory paragraphs. *NM* Ghavrel - 15/12/2009 04:37:53 AM 329 Views
Wow, thanks *NM* Blaine - 15/12/2009 02:22:48 PM 349 Views
That was a good critique. *NM* Tashmere - 16/12/2009 01:21:28 AM 249 Views
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