And also overestimate how easy it is for most women to say "okay, now I'm letting my husband take care of the household and children while I work".

There was a long article in the NYT a while ago on couples with stay-at-home fathers, and they pointed out - rightly, I think - that in most couples, both the ones where only the man works and the ones where both work, there's this unspoken rule that the woman is somehow in charge over the household and how to take care of (younger) children. In those rare couples where the woman works and the man stays at home, that means the woman has to give up that power and accept that it's her husband who is in charge of those things - and it would appear that that's harder than it might seem.

I agree with you, of course, that affordable daycare is essential for more gender equality on the labour market.