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actually... Diary - 13/04/2004 03:33:00 PM

i'm getting help for it at the moment. I think most people ever thought about suicide and didn't do it. I was really down a few months ago, for various reasons, and at a blank moment i took 9 painkillers, i don't remember much of the night afterwards, i just remember waking up with a huge headache and the feeling i had been stupid. i'm very glad it didn't work.
An other thing i have, and the thing i'm going to get a lot of help for is a sort of panic attacks. I'm really scared of feeling alone. and when i'm outside and feel alone i see myself die. It is really scary as i see myself drown in ever water i see, or hang in ever tree, or get crushed by ever car. The scariest part is that a part of me wishes it was really happening. Luckly i don't have many of those attacks, only once every while when i'm feeling really bad.
i can understand really well what you mean by being younger and thinking only sick people would do that. A year ago i had never even thought about suicide. A lot of things happened in the past 7 months that really changed my life, in good and bad ways. But i'm really glad with how my life looks like now, and i'm trying to become just as happy with myself.

i hope that answered your questions

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A personal question for those of you who wish to answer - 13/04/2004 02:59:16 PM 262 Views
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Re: One of my friends is in hospital. - 13/04/2004 03:18:51 PM 31 Views
on problems and solutions.... - 13/04/2004 04:05:59 PM 31 Views
No your problems are not eternal but death is. *NM* - 14/04/2004 12:33:05 PM 3 Views
I think that, - 14/04/2004 03:37:38 PM 7 Views
my condolences. - 15/04/2004 02:16:12 AM 5 Views
actually... - 13/04/2004 03:33:00 PM 57 Views
I've never even thought about it. *NM* - 13/04/2004 03:58:38 PM 2 Views
Never considered it. - 13/04/2004 04:01:57 PM 22 Views
Sadly... - 14/04/2004 03:44:02 PM 9 Views
Nah never really thought about it. *NM* - 13/04/2004 04:05:19 PM 2 Views
6-7 years ago. - 13/04/2004 04:38:27 PM 17 Views
my story - 13/04/2004 04:53:22 PM 28 Views
Thank you for sharing it. - 14/04/2004 03:54:22 PM 5 Views
Only one thing could make me do that... - 13/04/2004 07:18:23 PM 23 Views
Interesting. - 14/04/2004 03:57:57 PM 5 Views
Fascinating. - 13/04/2004 07:25:02 PM 20 Views
Answers - 13/04/2004 08:01:01 PM 22 Views
Wow. - 14/04/2004 04:06:35 PM 11 Views
Re: Wow. - 14/04/2004 06:05:19 PM 9 Views
hmm - 13/04/2004 09:37:19 PM 11 Views
Surely. - 13/04/2004 09:44:34 PM 16 Views
Never thought about it, except....... - 14/04/2004 01:27:09 AM 16 Views
Never seriously. - 14/04/2004 12:25:00 PM 3 Views
A personal, if somewhat morbid, answer. - 15/04/2004 02:50:45 AM 10 Views