Danae-Log:
So. What makes life worth living?
Danae al'Thor Send a noteboard - 08/05/2010 05:04:26 PM
So. What makes life worth living?
Danae al'Thor Send a noteboard - 08/05/2010 05:04:26 PM
No, really. Why do we, you, I, stick around? Love? Sex? Hugsies from Mommy? Money? Books? LSD? Babies? Duty?
I don't want to be talked out of committing suicide, mostly because I'm not committing suicide. But I am alive today mostly because of some vague principle that dying is probably worse than all this, my parents and brother would be sad, and I'm in therapy so that I don't commit suicide. So far as results go, it's working.
But over the last few months, I gotta tell you. I don't see the point. It's just going to be more of this... this struggle. Day after day. Why am I doing this? Obviously I'm missing something. Something that makes life "worth living" in a concrete sense, not just in this vague amorphous way.
What am I missing? I've been told to "cheer up" and the only reason I'm not happy is that I'm "not trying". It's like I "want to be miserable". And I look at my little white pills that help me get out of bed in the morning, at my very nice therapist who tells me not to be so angry at myself for not being happy or accomplished or okay... I don't know how to do this "trying" or "doing" or "cheerying".
So. If you feel up to it, if you want to, if you feel like it. Share your joy with me, for a bit, please?
I don't want to be talked out of committing suicide, mostly because I'm not committing suicide. But I am alive today mostly because of some vague principle that dying is probably worse than all this, my parents and brother would be sad, and I'm in therapy so that I don't commit suicide. So far as results go, it's working.
But over the last few months, I gotta tell you. I don't see the point. It's just going to be more of this... this struggle. Day after day. Why am I doing this? Obviously I'm missing something. Something that makes life "worth living" in a concrete sense, not just in this vague amorphous way.
What am I missing? I've been told to "cheer up" and the only reason I'm not happy is that I'm "not trying". It's like I "want to be miserable". And I look at my little white pills that help me get out of bed in the morning, at my very nice therapist who tells me not to be so angry at myself for not being happy or accomplished or okay... I don't know how to do this "trying" or "doing" or "cheerying".
So. If you feel up to it, if you want to, if you feel like it. Share your joy with me, for a bit, please?
http://coolingpearls.wordpress.com/
http://uncategoricallyroh.wordpress.com/
http://whaq.blogspot.com/
~Roh
http://uncategoricallyroh.wordpress.com/
http://whaq.blogspot.com/
~Roh
This message last edited by Danae al'Thor on 08/05/2010 at 06:31:51 PM
Danae-Log:
So. What makes life worth living?
- 08/05/2010 05:04:26 PM
1663 Views
So. What makes life worth living?
- 08/05/2010 05:04:26 PM
1663 Views
The good bits
- 08/05/2010 05:17:37 PM
1280 Views
Re: There are cannibals out there who believe(d) that if you ate bits of your enemy/someone,
- 08/05/2010 05:24:16 PM
1146 Views
Re: There are cannibals out there who believe(d) that if you ate bits of your enemy/someone,
- 08/05/2010 05:27:27 PM
1103 Views
Re: It's because the muscles haven't gotten all developed and stringy yet.
- 08/05/2010 05:28:44 PM
1214 Views
Re: It's because the muscles haven't gotten all developed and stringy yet.
- 08/05/2010 05:30:42 PM
1030 Views
Re: I think lots of us had pre-construed that anyway. Sorry.
- 08/05/2010 05:35:16 PM
1154 Views
- 08/05/2010 05:35:16 PM
1154 Views
Try meditation. Just breathing exercises and relaxation.
- 08/05/2010 05:24:34 PM
1250 Views
Re: Um, I meditate. And I manage quote fine without CDs to do it.
*NM*
- 08/05/2010 05:27:28 PM
679 Views
*NM*
- 08/05/2010 05:27:28 PM
679 Views
I would posit you're not doing a good job if you're considering suicide. *NM*
- 09/05/2010 04:39:05 AM
749 Views
Re: I'm not considering suicide! It says so in my post! I'm so annoyed with people who assume I am!
- 09/05/2010 05:23:37 AM
1214 Views
Why do you need to affirmatively say you're not considering suicide, then?
- 09/05/2010 05:41:50 AM
1232 Views
Re: Because I wanted to make clear my problem, and ask for a little help that wasn't about fixing me
- 09/05/2010 05:50:27 AM
1178 Views
I can only think of one reason
- 08/05/2010 06:43:11 PM
1310 Views
Frankly, I agree, but it's not something of which people can be really be "convinced. "
- 12/05/2010 12:43:29 AM
1269 Views
No
- 12/05/2010 12:53:42 AM
1169 Views
Oh, I totally agree.
- 12/05/2010 01:05:29 AM
1078 Views
Ah, so you used "convinced" as a verb and not as a participle
*NM*
- 12/05/2010 09:30:59 AM
647 Views
*NM*
- 12/05/2010 09:30:59 AM
647 Views
personally
- 08/05/2010 06:45:45 PM
1162 Views
That's an insanely hard question Danae
- 08/05/2010 08:53:06 PM
1288 Views
Re:
- 08/05/2010 08:58:50 PM
1326 Views
- 08/05/2010 08:58:50 PM
1326 Views
Ah, I see
- 08/05/2010 09:19:22 PM
1195 Views
Re: I think the difference between you and me in some ways is...
- 08/05/2010 09:27:17 PM
1042 Views
So what makes you think death is any better? *NM*
- 08/05/2010 09:11:46 PM
629 Views
Re: Um, since I am not contemplating suicide, it's not an issue.
- 08/05/2010 09:16:39 PM
1251 Views
No easy answer.
- 08/05/2010 09:26:52 PM
987 Views
Re: Dude, my new pills have cured my insomnia, it is awesome. I'd forgotten about that.
- 08/05/2010 09:28:54 PM
1143 Views
I just wanna know what's next, 'cause it tends to be baffling.
- 08/05/2010 10:18:16 PM
1249 Views
Re:
Do you believe in reincarnation? You might be able to! *NM*
- 09/05/2010 05:24:17 AM
535 Views
Do you believe in reincarnation? You might be able to! *NM*
- 09/05/2010 05:24:17 AM
535 Views
That would be way awesome.
- 09/05/2010 11:53:40 PM
1216 Views
Re: I haven't read it. Or heard of it.
Let us know what it's like! *NM*
- 10/05/2010 08:36:41 AM
675 Views
Let us know what it's like! *NM*
- 10/05/2010 08:36:41 AM
675 Views
Experience
- 08/05/2010 10:44:08 PM
1275 Views
I'm fairly certain there isn't some magic "thing."
- 08/05/2010 10:45:34 PM
1090 Views
Because I can't be world dictator if I am dead
- 08/05/2010 10:47:37 PM
1099 Views
Re: I think it's a RAFOnaut thing, to want to be world dictator.
- 09/05/2010 05:28:01 AM
1183 Views
Helping other people. *NM*
- 08/05/2010 10:51:28 PM
534 Views
Can't help you there.
- 08/05/2010 11:22:01 PM
1138 Views
Some days it just boils down to duty.
- 09/05/2010 12:52:06 AM
1266 Views
Re: The no expectations thing is HARD. To do on a moment-to-moment basis.
- 09/05/2010 05:43:00 AM
1232 Views
I was in a slightly bleak mood when I wrote the first reply. I need to amend it.
- 13/05/2010 12:59:09 AM
1302 Views
That there will be a sixth season of Supernatural?
- 09/05/2010 06:30:34 AM
1228 Views
Re: I actually haven't watched anything since xxx released ddd and told aaa he'd say ssss.
- 09/05/2010 10:28:03 AM
1005 Views
love, connection with others, the awe of being alive in the world
- 09/05/2010 07:17:34 AM
1005 Views
Whatever you decide it does
- 09/05/2010 10:17:09 AM
1129 Views
Yep, it's one of those clips that makes you think mankind isn't that bad after all
*NM*
- 11/05/2010 09:20:38 AM
626 Views
*NM*
- 11/05/2010 09:20:38 AM
626 Views
The small things.
- 09/05/2010 10:45:46 AM
1228 Views
Re: Dammit, Rebekah, now I have a song playing in my head.
- 09/05/2010 11:06:46 AM
987 Views
Carnal bliss, hydrocodone and brownies
- 09/05/2010 10:47:24 AM
1298 Views
I stick around for updates to the Danae-Log!
- 10/05/2010 12:14:43 PM
1243 Views
- 10/05/2010 12:14:43 PM
1243 Views
Re: Dude.
- 10/05/2010 04:44:24 PM
1032 Views
- 10/05/2010 04:44:24 PM
1032 Views
Heh. click the link.
- 10/05/2010 05:45:53 PM
1204 Views
- 10/05/2010 05:45:53 PM
1204 Views


*NM*