And 90% is clearly ridiculous.
Having said that, though, she is actually doing more of the "caregiving" and "looking after" than you are, by a fair amount, if you factor in the time overnight that Melissa is sleeping. You have a disproportionate number of overnight sleeping hours. Daytime care hours give you 2 full days, Sat. and Sun., with a few hours a couple of other days a week. She has most of the other 5 days of waking time. That gives her closer to 70%, but still nowhere near 90% of course. It does make her the "primary" caregiver, though.
Just throwing another perspective out there for you to keep in mind as you go through this process. It sounds to me like the more time Melissa gets to spend with you, the better off she is. Good luck with all of this.
Having said that, though, she is actually doing more of the "caregiving" and "looking after" than you are, by a fair amount, if you factor in the time overnight that Melissa is sleeping. You have a disproportionate number of overnight sleeping hours. Daytime care hours give you 2 full days, Sat. and Sun., with a few hours a couple of other days a week. She has most of the other 5 days of waking time. That gives her closer to 70%, but still nowhere near 90% of course. It does make her the "primary" caregiver, though.
Just throwing another perspective out there for you to keep in mind as you go through this process. It sounds to me like the more time Melissa gets to spend with you, the better off she is. Good luck with all of this.
Unfortunately I have to work (as I'm the only one of us who does) and therefore simply cannot look after her more. If Amy worked her '70%' would be eroded decidedly as that would all be time that Melly was awake.
I'm not sure if the court cares about waking and sleeping, but were Amy working as opposed to being supported by me, she wouldn't be 70% either. The court (according to the lawyer I just got off the phone with) DOES care about her not working as she's considered to have an obligation to support herself and her portion of the childcare. I'm not sure that the court will give her credit for choosing to be a deadbeat in order to up her primary care percentage.
I did think of the sleeping thing too, of course, but the math for that is harder to work out. If we were to calculate only waking time though, she does do about twice what I do - although how much of that is ignoring Melly while she plays with the other couple of kids in her household is another question entirely.
And regardless, I can't really do a lot more and still have a job and anything that even starts to look like a life. As it is my weekends are entirely one long babysitting session and I can't get much, if anything, done during them. Makes keeping up with the housework and maintenance pretty tough.
May God stand between you and harm in all the empty places you must walk.
Old Egyptian Blessing
Old Egyptian Blessing
So more on the whole custody thing
- 26/05/2010 03:42:21 PM
792 Views
Well she definitely sucks at math 
- 26/05/2010 04:01:59 PM
666 Views
- 26/05/2010 04:01:59 PM
666 Views
Indeed.
- 26/05/2010 04:14:49 PM
555 Views
I'm assuming Melissa's not in school
- 26/05/2010 05:07:32 PM
567 Views
That really sucks
- 26/05/2010 06:11:34 PM
615 Views
As a general rule, rationalization and self deceit are the primary tools of a woman's trade.
- 27/05/2010 03:24:30 AM
573 Views
*NM*