Which is not meant as a one-up, more of a "hang in there." I know it's nerve-wracking to break away from well established traditions, but just do whatever makes the two of you happy. Trust me, when all is said and done, you'll be surprised at the reactions you get. A lot of the people that I most expected to have a hard time with the non-traditional parts of my wedding were actually the most complimentary afterwards. A lot of my old, tradition-bound (or so I thought) relatives told me that mine was the best wedding they'd ever been to, and they loved how fresh, comfortable and original things were.

Anyway, do what you need to in order to have a good time, and everyone else will come around.

As far as budget, I'm sure you've noticed by now that food and space are going to be your two biggest expenses. For my wedding, we cut those costs down by having the wedding and reception at the same place (rented a place on a lake and had the wedding on the huge deck over the water, then the reception in the attached conference room), and having friends and family prepare the food for us. I know that sounds like a big imposition, but with the right menu, it's actually not too much work. We had pot roast (leave in the oven for a few hours the night before, then heat up the day of), soup (buy giant bags of soup from Panera, and put in crockpots), salad (buy large pre-made bags from Costco), rolls (also bought in bulk from Panera), etc. The pot roast was the only thing that really needed to "cook," and the entire meal for 150+ people was prepared on the day of the wedding in less than two hours.

I'm not sure any of the above really helps you much, but I figured you might be interested in the experience of someone who was very recently in the same position. Good luck!