But the labeling problem has just as much to do with calling them all "hate filled". You can't see into everybody's heart to determine if they feel hatred for other people. If one opposes changing the definition of marriage because of deeply held religious beliefs, you can't say it is actually motivated by hatred. Well you can say that, you are just wrong to do it. And it is done all the time.

There are certainly haters out there. But not most of them in my experience. Most will tell you what why they oppose changing the definition of marriage. But after they tell you their motivation, you can then throw that out and assume that their real motivation is hatred.

It is just a trick to dehumanize your opponents. Yours opponents aren't just wrong/stupid/misinformed, they are actually filled with hate!