The women are generally all of the "*sniff* Oh, those men, they will screw everything up if I don't take control of things. I am patronizingly fond of them, so let's let them feel like they're making decisions while us women folk figure out what we should REALLY do *adjust skirts*"


Some of them are slightly angrier than others, some have a touch more respect, and see (certain) men as their equals, but in general this is the attitude of the women in the series.

The men, on the other hand, are actual human beings. Some are strong, some are weak, some are brave, some are cowardly, some fight for good, some are selfish.

I'd respect Tam al'Thor and Abel Cauthon over any of the Aes Sedai bar maybe Moiraine, and that's only because Moiraine's backstory is very impressive.




____


As for the polygamy thing, a few points.

One, I'd say it's silly to see it as inherently immoral. I'm not sure if that's the point you were making, but if it is, I disagree. Polygamy in Real Life has a lot of baggage associated with it, and connotations of abuse. In Wheel of Time, with the Aiel, there are no such connotations.

And as for why in-world characters don't object... well, they don't know!

Think about it. Min is really the only public "girlfriend" Rand has, and even she is generally only known to those that meet Rand personally. His contact with Elayne has been limited to a week of making out in the dark corners of the Stone of Tear, and a night in Caemlyn in which he came to her in disguise.

Aviendha isn't well known to wetlanders, either- she's Aiel, she's usually off training with the Wise Ones, and she stopped sleeping in his room once they got to Cairhein (I think?). The only ones who know about Aviendha are some of the Aiel, and they certainly have nothing against sister-wives.



Those close to Rand who know have been extremely surprised, and often a bit disapproving (Nynaeve is the main one I'm thinking of). But for the most part, they see that everyone involved seems happy with the arrangement, there are more important things to worry about, and honestly, it's not any of their business anyway.