Bullying itself doesn't lead to suicide, yet it is very much a factor in suicide. What is the real cause of suicide is not pain in itself, but the thought that the pain is eternal and their is no hope, and you would do anything to make it stop.

In addition in my mind it isn't the conflict of being gay or being different that causes people to commit suicide. Nor is it the family conflict. A couple of those 5 people I listed were already out before committing suicide, yet the committed suicide even if they accepted the fact they were gay.

What causes people to commit suicide is that their lives are miserable, always has been, and the feel it always will be miserable. Bullying by itself isn't the cause of suicide, it is just something that escalates the situation, it is the kerosene thrown on the fire. There is a difference from having an awful life and having a one that is miserable, their is a difference from suffering pain and suffering misery. Some people here may not understand this but people that have suffered depression or have attempted suicide definitely know what I am talking about.

The fact that a couple of those boys have come out as gay and then years later committed suicide illustrates this point. To them they have already accepted they were gay, accepted they weren't going to change that fact, it was going to be forever. And if being gay means being in pain, and if gay is forever, then it follows to that depressed person mind that pain is forever, misery is forever, and there is no hope, no joy in the world.

And that is why Dan Savage project hopefully will make a difference. Life can get better, in addition you can change how you feel pain, pain doesn't have to equal misery. The fact you can change how you experience pain though will probably not work on changing a teenage mind though, it has to be experienced and it is a process that takes years.

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One of the reason that children rarely commit suicide when compared to adults is that their sense of death, personhood and time is completely different than a teenager, completely different than an adult.