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Suicide is painless... damookster Send a noteboard - 10/06/2018 05:08:02 AM

This past week has seen Kate Spade and Anthony Bourdin both decide to end their lives. They were not people burdened by the hopelessness of abject poverty. Which makes sense because studies on suicide reveal that those desperately poor don’t often kill themselves. Suicide is much more prevalent among those who have plenty but realize their material goods mean little or nothing.

I have been in treatment for chronic depression for 25 years. Suicide is in my thoughts every day. Even more so since Laurel died. Why not join her? The damage it would do to my children and my grandchild is all that stops me.

Depression blows. Nothing can cure it. Talk therapy is annoying particularly when you realize you are smarter than your therapist. Antidepressants only do so much. Sooner or later, if you have half a brain, you realize there is only one way out.

Since Laurel died, I can’t sleep easily unless I am drunk. At 65, the hangovers aren’t worth it anymore. So then I don’t sleep. Or I drink too much and feel like shit for two days. Death is the answer for those who can’t sleep.

What am I saying? That I totally understand why people like Spade and Bourdin made the decisions they made. That I could easily do the same. I haven’t so far. What about tomorrow? Don’t know. I don’t think I will. But who ever knows.


EDIt


I’ve been cutting my arms and legs the last two weeks. If anyone asks I tell them it’s from playing with my cat. It actually feels good. Who knew?

Mook

*MySmiley*



"Bustin' makes me feel good!"

Ghostbusters, by Ray Parker Jr.
This message last edited by damookster on 10/06/2018 at 06:48:57 AM
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Suicide is painless... - 10/06/2018 05:08:02 AM 683 Views
Hrmmm.... - 10/06/2018 03:05:23 PM 779 Views
Thanks Larry - 11/06/2018 12:36:56 AM 406 Views
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Just a general statement..... - 10/06/2018 08:41:20 PM 496 Views
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That took a dark turn - 10/06/2018 11:20:05 PM 452 Views
I have somehow managed to make it to age 65 despite being suicidal since I was 12. - 11/06/2018 12:28:37 AM 420 Views
I'm going to a therapist, but it feels like too little to late. - 12/06/2018 08:14:36 PM 427 Views
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My friend, I am sorry to read this. - 11/06/2018 04:29:03 PM 603 Views
You and Larry both advise running. - 12/06/2018 09:47:47 PM 416 Views
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To live is to suffer. It's the price we pay for all the good things. - 11/06/2018 04:48:49 PM 517 Views
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I wish I had some wisdom for you. - 11/06/2018 07:42:39 PM 423 Views
I already know all the wise council for someone like me - 12/06/2018 09:45:29 PM 399 Views
Suicide is not painless - 12/06/2018 07:50:11 PM 453 Views
It's the title of a song - 12/06/2018 09:33:23 PM 414 Views
I have no words of wisdon except stay strong - 14/06/2018 07:26:03 PM 423 Views

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