Egwene's entire storyline has been about expanding cooperation and the building of bridges. ToM only drove this home. In the Tower, she has a "dream team" of Silviana, the Black Ajah hunters, Nynaeve, Siuan, Leanne, the Novices. In the Hall, she just pushed through a reform which means that she can never again stuff it with her supporters and get her way. The Hall has more people who oppose her than support her, but she just ensured she can never ignore their voices.

In the greater world, Egwene has just set up an open competition between the WO, the WF and the AS, one that means there's less reason to hide and secretly maneuver. And in the issues that matter, the Seanchan and the Shadow, these female channeling organizations will be together, making them that much better at dealing with these threats.

As for the rulers, she was again very honest and forthright with them. She wants them, and she wants their armies, to show Rand a powerful united front. There's no secret plan here. And the rulers were not forced. No one was dragged to Merrilor. Those who didn't want to come due to threats to their home countries were given assurances of Traveling being made available to them. There was no "I'm Amyrlin, you come when I call!" about it.

As for male channelers: Of the supergirls, Egwene has the most quotes with positive things to say about them. She wanted to know why the Tower hadn't found a way to deal with them that didn't involve stilling. She was opposed to any attack on the Black Tower. She was opposed to killing or gentling Logain. She threatened stilling to a powerful Sitter who suggested forcibly bonding and compelling them to control them. She had no problems believing saidin was cleansed, and made it clear she expects the Red Ajah to change their purpose. She made it clear she doesn't think it makes sense to withhold angreal and ter'angreal attuned to men.

As for Rand's plan to break the Seals: exactly who did she browbeat into taking her view? Can we see some quotes?

In every way since KoD, Egwene represents the "ideal leader", that Rand also became after his epiphany. She is far from perfect, and as DomA said, she still has to prove that she can rule well in "peace-time", but your central point that she embodies the isolated, domineering leader is totally without basis.