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Re: *butts in* ßelals Girl Send a noteboard - 24/03/2011 03:03:14 AM
Sorry, just felt like it. ;)


You are always welcome ;)

There is a difference between preserving race/ethnicity out of respect and honor (as even some people I know have done) and refusing to mix with others out of fear, bigotry or an excessive level of pride. Both options (preserving ethnicity/race AND interracial relationships) have issues when one starts to believe only in black and white (har) absolutes.


I know that, and I practice the former version, and it sounds like the original poster's concerns are based somewhat on the former version as well. But Tom didn't distinguish, which led me to believe he was referring to all forms of preservation when he said they had no place in society.

On one hand, Aeryn is being conscientious about an existing issue, but I think she'd be going too far if she tried to create a situation to stop this particular man dating a white person because he should be dating a black girl.


Right. Even if she was concerned about preservation issues, she can only control her own behavior, not anyone elses.
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Interracial dating (in the dating dilemma series) Aeryn - 23/03/2011 11:11:14 AM 2306 Views
I am not a black woman and I haven't done it ironclad - 23/03/2011 11:24:16 AM 1287 Views
Re: Aeryn - 23/03/2011 11:38:31 AM 1296 Views
Independence Day reference? Good man. *NM* Ghavrel - 23/03/2011 08:28:35 PM 622 Views
john lennon... MalkierKnight - 24/03/2011 01:08:20 PM 1346 Views
If you limit your dating pool by race you really have no reason to complain Camilla - 23/03/2011 11:57:48 AM 1234 Views
I dated a black girl for nearly 3 years. Dragonsoul - 23/03/2011 12:29:26 PM 1315 Views
ironclad - 23/03/2011 12:57:08 PM 1327 Views
LMAO Jens, you know me too well Aisha - 23/03/2011 11:30:35 PM 1216 Views
And her mother is Muslim. Dragonsoul - 24/03/2011 11:48:24 AM 1244 Views
What's it called? *NM* Legolas - 24/03/2011 10:36:28 PM 636 Views
please give him a moment to google an answer. *NM* Aisha - 25/03/2011 11:04:02 AM 646 Views
She said it's called Abu Haifa (sp?) Dragonsoul - 25/03/2011 10:38:13 PM 1217 Views
Hm, okay. Legolas - 26/03/2011 12:16:02 AM 1365 Views
That was it, Abu Hanifa. I'm poor with Arabic. Dragonsoul - 26/03/2011 01:08:12 AM 1296 Views
amazingly enough, I dont believe you. Aisha - 23/03/2011 11:32:26 PM 1335 Views
I'd prove it to you. Dragonsoul - 24/03/2011 11:47:33 AM 1218 Views
God help me, I'm agreeing with Dragonsoul. Ghavrel - 24/03/2011 09:29:56 PM 1192 Views
I think he is making it up for the benefit of this comunity Aisha - 24/03/2011 10:03:21 PM 1320 Views
Sometimes I worry about "this community"... Joel - 25/03/2011 11:33:17 PM 1431 Views
I think that would be a poor reason to not date someone random thoughts - 23/03/2011 01:07:31 PM 1317 Views
Can you edit your post and take out the cow analogies? Thanks. *NM* Vivien - 23/03/2011 03:31:51 PM 642 Views
I didn't even see the "cow & milk" analogy. Aeryn - 24/03/2011 04:03:02 AM 1199 Views
being offensive makes it no less true random thoughts - 24/03/2011 01:25:34 PM 1206 Views
It's true that after a certain age, average men have an easier time finding dates Helene - 24/03/2011 01:31:35 PM 1194 Views
I don't date so I don't have personal experience random thoughts - 24/03/2011 03:29:50 PM 1175 Views
I don't date either... :-) Helene - 24/03/2011 03:42:33 PM 1395 Views
I think you're doing him a disservice. nossy - 23/03/2011 02:16:59 PM 1287 Views
This. Plus, to try to frame it more in A's terms... Sareitha Sedai - 23/03/2011 03:05:55 PM 1219 Views
It can add extra complications that negatively impact the likelihood of a successful relationship Helene - 23/03/2011 02:50:39 PM 1216 Views
What I forgot to mention in the post Helene - 23/03/2011 03:01:04 PM 1193 Views
Re: What I forgot to mention in the post Aeryn - 24/03/2011 05:11:11 AM 1250 Views
If you have a lot in common with him and like him and are attracted to him Helene - 24/03/2011 09:41:01 AM 1139 Views
I think you should date him. Palatine - 23/03/2011 03:02:56 PM 1146 Views
I think you should date this guy if you like him. Morgawse - 23/03/2011 03:07:30 PM 1190 Views
I think that you're doing both of you a disservice. Jeordam - 23/03/2011 03:09:29 PM 1233 Views
I agree with you. Vivien - 23/03/2011 03:26:02 PM 1230 Views
And my opinion matters more than everyone else here combined! MWAHAHAHAHAHA Vivien - 23/03/2011 03:28:06 PM 1185 Views
Well, you know your sis better than we do... ironclad - 23/03/2011 03:48:12 PM 1181 Views
Because you never know. Vivien - 23/03/2011 04:00:44 PM 1368 Views
Geez you know just the right things to say. Aeryn - 24/03/2011 03:38:34 AM 1210 Views
LOL. ( Yes I really did laugh out loud) *NM* Vivien - 24/03/2011 03:55:22 AM 619 Views
Most of the other responses are ignoring your reasons. Vivien - 23/03/2011 03:34:56 PM 1161 Views
No one should try to think from "the perspective of black women", not even 1 black woman can do that Helene - 23/03/2011 03:47:34 PM 1211 Views
Re Vivien - 23/03/2011 04:05:20 PM 1345 Views
I'm sure that Aeryn is lovely, but she's not the only lovely white woman in the world Helene - 24/03/2011 09:43:32 AM 1204 Views
Or nossy - 23/03/2011 03:47:56 PM 1200 Views
We have no control over how other people act. Vivien - 23/03/2011 04:07:11 PM 1331 Views
I agree completely. nossy - 23/03/2011 04:17:59 PM 1292 Views
And it's a bit silly to determine for someone else who he should be dating *NM* Helene - 24/03/2011 09:33:09 AM 583 Views
This has to be one of the stupidest reasons for not dating someone I've ever heard. Tom - 23/03/2011 03:54:15 PM 1221 Views
Your opinion: less than nothing. Vivien - 23/03/2011 04:10:24 PM 1303 Views
Who are you? Dark Knight - 23/03/2011 08:37:43 PM 1348 Views
It's extremely unlikely that Tom was offended. Vivien - 23/03/2011 09:04:42 PM 1236 Views
I'm glad you're back, by the way. These threads are great. *NM* Ghavrel - 23/03/2011 09:15:41 PM 642 Views
Thank you. *NM* Vivien - 24/03/2011 04:01:08 AM 642 Views
I'm not offended, only amused at your poor logic. Tom - 23/03/2011 09:24:05 PM 1264 Views
That's lawyer logic! Vivien - 24/03/2011 03:50:37 AM 1201 Views
Is there any other kind? *NM* Tom - 24/03/2011 02:05:27 PM 626 Views
Ooh that's harsh. Aeryn - 24/03/2011 03:48:50 AM 1182 Views
This is all I get???? Vivien - 24/03/2011 03:54:22 AM 1254 Views
Oh, I appreciate. There's cake in the fridge *NM* Aeryn - 24/03/2011 04:27:20 AM 597 Views
You two are sooo cute! *NM* ironclad - 24/03/2011 07:29:12 PM 511 Views
+1, though I probably wouldn't have said it in quite the same way. Joel - 23/03/2011 11:03:07 PM 1216 Views
Yup. beetnemesis - 24/03/2011 01:42:16 AM 1285 Views
That's a good analogy. Aeryn - 24/03/2011 03:50:17 AM 1319 Views
Shrug. She likes *me*. Plus, Jewish guys love Asian girls, well-known fact. beetnemesis - 24/03/2011 04:46:56 AM 1205 Views
So it's not her choice who she wants to date, but everyone around her?? Helene - 24/03/2011 09:39:58 AM 1182 Views
What's wrong with wanting to preserve races or ethnic groups? ßelals Girl - 24/03/2011 02:09:02 AM 1255 Views
When its the black race? *NM* Urza - 24/03/2011 02:21:13 AM 627 Views
You're such an ass *NM* ßelals Girl - 24/03/2011 02:52:12 AM 611 Views
*butts in* nossy - 24/03/2011 02:45:26 AM 1268 Views
"It would be wrong, immortal [sic] even". Tom - 24/03/2011 02:52:21 AM 1297 Views
Or potentially not (directly) from Africa nossy - 24/03/2011 03:06:36 AM 1132 Views
I've only seen "identifies as" when someone is of mixed race. *NM* Tom - 24/03/2011 03:09:51 AM 591 Views
You're absolutely right. Aeryn - 24/03/2011 04:14:49 AM 1245 Views
Then your argument is even sillier, as mixed race is too white Helene - 24/03/2011 09:50:15 AM 1111 Views
Is he "identifying as" black in a cultural context as well? Tom - 24/03/2011 02:04:43 PM 1098 Views
Re: *butts in* ßelals Girl - 24/03/2011 03:03:14 AM 1132 Views
You're a damn genius! nossy - 24/03/2011 03:09:26 AM 1222 Views
I don't feel like one ßelals Girl - 25/03/2011 01:17:07 AM 1187 Views
Re: This has to be one of the stupidest reasons for not dating someone I've ever heard. Aeryn - 24/03/2011 04:07:36 AM 1251 Views
That could be argued in the opposite way just as easily. Helene - 24/03/2011 09:48:16 AM 1164 Views
Huh Aeryn - 25/03/2011 11:15:58 AM 1197 Views
Are you looking for reasons not to date him, or are you just being overly socially conscience? Beqi - 23/03/2011 08:12:48 PM 1199 Views
Ha. Aeryn - 24/03/2011 04:17:26 AM 1201 Views
Heh, that really is the best thing *NM* beetnemesis - 24/03/2011 04:48:07 AM 631 Views
...wat. Is this a serious post? Ghavrel - 23/03/2011 08:23:04 PM 1215 Views
Kinda? Aeryn - 24/03/2011 04:23:12 AM 1261 Views
I just broke up with my Pakistani girlfriend Dark Knight - 23/03/2011 08:24:52 PM 1183 Views
Heh heh heh heh snoopcester - 23/03/2011 08:25:06 PM 1044 Views
Ha, I didn't even see that typo. Aeryn - 24/03/2011 05:14:40 AM 1100 Views
<3 You Ana, BUT Urza - 23/03/2011 08:44:11 PM 1192 Views
wait. did you..? Aeryn - 24/03/2011 04:37:23 AM 1199 Views
Your taken aback by this why? Urza - 24/03/2011 06:30:46 AM 1253 Views
I thought this was a great post. Legolas - 23/03/2011 10:26:08 PM 1266 Views
Glad I could entertain. *NM* Aeryn - 24/03/2011 03:47:48 AM 563 Views
I understand what you are saying. Tashmere - 23/03/2011 11:04:44 PM 1191 Views
An ally! Score! Vivien - 24/03/2011 03:56:53 AM 1158 Views
Aw, you're a darling. Aeryn - 24/03/2011 04:26:39 AM 1201 Views
Also somebody brought up the valid point of his rights. Tashmere - 26/03/2011 11:55:49 PM 1213 Views
There's not a wealth of eligible men from any race; maybe you should just stop dating entirely. Joel - 23/03/2011 11:27:40 PM 1137 Views
Well, yeah. Aeryn - 24/03/2011 04:49:47 AM 1056 Views
The critically large word is "if"; your reasoning is setting off massive circular claxons for me. Joel - 25/03/2011 11:30:15 PM 1006 Views
he is not a resource, he is a man. *NM* Aisha - 23/03/2011 11:29:37 PM 684 Views
Cock is a resource. *NM* Urza - 23/03/2011 11:43:39 PM 598 Views
"Efficient allocation of cock?" Oh my, that sounds really wrong. *NM* Aeryn - 24/03/2011 04:32:23 AM 604 Views
seriously? that is dumb. date the man. also, it is dehumanising to refer to him as a resource. temeraire - 24/03/2011 12:52:38 AM 1257 Views
This is exactly it. Dan - 24/03/2011 04:02:10 AM 1256 Views
I didn't quite. I was talking about the economic principle. *NM* Aeryn - 24/03/2011 04:42:57 AM 593 Views
<--Black Guy Post Daiyon - 24/03/2011 12:57:13 AM 1335 Views
Re: Aeryn - 24/03/2011 04:53:07 AM 1239 Views
Um. rebelaessedai - 24/03/2011 01:00:47 AM 1369 Views
Well, according to stand-up comics who specialize in racially based humor... TaskmasterJack - 24/03/2011 01:29:35 AM 1251 Views
Practical advice. I like it. Aeryn - 24/03/2011 03:58:24 AM 1258 Views
Practical advice! *NM* Vivien - 24/03/2011 03:58:34 AM 591 Views
... how did you? *NM* Aeryn - 24/03/2011 04:31:14 AM 662 Views
I don't know! Our posts are about 1/10 of a second apart, freaky. *NM* Vivien - 24/03/2011 04:35:23 AM 597 Views
1/6 of a minute. But it's still a comical coincidence. *NM* TaskmasterJack - 24/03/2011 09:52:19 PM 620 Views
But that means if he's OK with it he's a commodity more rare and valuable than gold. Joel - 25/03/2011 11:37:48 PM 1119 Views
I present to you: A VISION OF THE FUTURE-UTRE-UTRE-UTRE beetnemesis - 24/03/2011 02:19:19 AM 1310 Views
Oh, that was awesome *NM* Aeryn - 24/03/2011 03:37:01 AM 634 Views
+ 10 best post ever. I can't believe how funny that was. *NM* Timthetrolloc - 24/03/2011 03:54:39 AM 643 Views
What just happened? *NM* Ghavrel - 24/03/2011 04:04:45 AM 591 Views
*NM* ironclad - 24/03/2011 08:32:36 AM 524 Views
Awesome *NM* Stephen - 24/03/2011 09:03:13 AM 701 Views
I am currently dating a black woman... MightyYT - 24/03/2011 06:29:03 AM 1199 Views
...I always figured your name was a Snow Crash reference *NM* beetnemesis - 24/03/2011 03:48:53 PM 621 Views
I have had the nickname longer than that has been out. *NM* MightyYT - 24/03/2011 07:08:02 PM 637 Views
Don't date him. Stephen - 24/03/2011 09:44:30 AM 1205 Views
Its not likely anyone will read this comment since there are so many already MalkierKnight - 24/03/2011 01:12:19 PM 1384 Views
She's not talking about welfare queens, she's talking about well educated black women Helene - 24/03/2011 01:33:48 PM 1271 Views
It is. *NM* Ghavrel - 24/03/2011 09:33:01 PM 578 Views
this might help you understand what she is talking about random thoughts - 25/03/2011 02:24:35 PM 1251 Views
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