You can see the precursor to balefire being generated whether you are a male or a female. If you are a male channeler, you do not see flows of saidar used to create the effect, and if you are a female channeler you would not see flows of saidin used to create the effect. Whether or not you see it being woven depends on your gender - Moiraine, was walking forward and largely escaped notice until she had set her flows and balefire began to form in front of her.

For example, non-channelers see lightning whether or not a male or female channeler created it, but they do not see the weaves, because the effect is generated by the weave itself.