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Not the former for sure, and maybe not the latter. Palatine Send a noteboard - 19/04/2011 05:55:03 PM
As an example, he mentioned this past weekend. His wife had asked him if he wanted to go with her to her mother for Easter. He replied: "I'll think about it." Her response was that she said she'll just go on her own.


But surely not a good thing. Whether that leads to a break down is unknowable from the information provided. There is a lack of communication, however.

If what you wrote is correct--that she asked if he wanted to go--then he didn't answer her question. Either he does or does not want to go. That shouldn't be something he needs to think about, really. Not after enough time together anyway. He avoided the question, and she let it slide.

If she asked if he "will" go with her, then his answer makes sense, and shows that she knows his feelings about the matter better. That scenario would demonstrate a better understanding of expectations between them.
*MySmiley*

I play air tambourine. Competitively.
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Relationship - positive development or signs of eventual break down? Helene - 19/04/2011 08:48:26 AM 1998 Views
Helene, I want to give you an answer but... Urza - 19/04/2011 08:58:45 AM 1137 Views
Fair enough Helene - 19/04/2011 10:01:51 AM 1086 Views
Not all inlaws are bad, you know, I prefer some of my inlaws to my own family. *NM* Macharius - 19/04/2011 01:56:03 PM 559 Views
inlaws are not always bad random thoughts - 19/04/2011 02:10:18 PM 1046 Views
I spend way more time with my in-laws than with my own family. Sareitha Sedai - 19/04/2011 02:17:41 PM 1038 Views
I'm like this with my future in-laws too. *NM* Clover - 19/04/2011 04:47:05 PM 541 Views
I think they are right ironclad - 19/04/2011 10:20:39 AM 1271 Views
I see your point Helene - 19/04/2011 10:42:51 AM 1229 Views
Re: I think they are right Macharius - 19/04/2011 01:59:57 PM 1099 Views
I think that's an unfair assumption. Sareitha Sedai - 19/04/2011 02:16:54 PM 1028 Views
What he said about his wife's mother Helene - 19/04/2011 02:59:32 PM 1199 Views
Ew. I would have a problem with that too. Something about that attitude makes me dig in my heels. Tashmere - 20/04/2011 01:37:38 AM 948 Views
No offense... ironclad - 19/04/2011 02:35:53 PM 1173 Views
yes but have you found such a thing? random thoughts - 19/04/2011 03:05:35 PM 1107 Views
For now I have *NM* ironclad - 19/04/2011 03:08:17 PM 570 Views
how long has it been? *NM* random thoughts - 19/04/2011 03:16:32 PM 551 Views
Don't try to corrupt me with your long term pessimism ironclad - 19/04/2011 03:34:39 PM 1050 Views
sadly I seem attracted to the crazies *NM* random thoughts - 19/04/2011 04:08:14 PM 540 Views
Yes. But it didn't start out like that. Took years to chip away all our rough edges. Tashmere - 20/04/2011 01:40:29 AM 1116 Views
Could be either snoopcester - 19/04/2011 10:30:50 AM 1150 Views
True enough... Helene - 19/04/2011 10:44:28 AM 1116 Views
My opinion is the latter. Macharius - 19/04/2011 01:55:00 PM 1119 Views
He definitely has a point about realistic expectations Sareitha Sedai - 19/04/2011 01:56:49 PM 1102 Views
Re: He definitely has a point about realistic expectations Macharius - 19/04/2011 02:07:34 PM 1084 Views
Re: He definitely has a point about realistic expectations snoopcester - 19/04/2011 02:13:25 PM 1204 Views
I should have read this first. Sareitha Sedai - 19/04/2011 02:25:16 PM 1134 Views
Re: He definitely has a point about realistic expectations Sareitha Sedai - 19/04/2011 02:23:14 PM 1114 Views
You don't strike me as the "screeching-howler-monkey" type to begin with. *NM* Macharius - 19/04/2011 03:33:41 PM 544 Views
I love just about everything about you Sareitha. Good answers all. *NM* Tashmere - 20/04/2011 01:26:34 AM 517 Views
I translated "I will think about it" as a secret but obvious code for. "I don't really want to but Tashmere - 20/04/2011 01:34:36 AM 1224 Views
that's what I would have meant if I said "I'll think about it" *NM* LadyLorraine - 20/04/2011 02:00:33 AM 510 Views
The fact that you are referring to a fiancé and comparing it to wife says a lot random thoughts - 19/04/2011 02:09:27 PM 1210 Views
To be fair, me and my fiance have been together for about as long as they have Helene - 19/04/2011 02:57:03 PM 1054 Views
I don't know about everyone but things changed when we got married random thoughts - 19/04/2011 03:16:11 PM 1090 Views
How did things change? Helene - 19/04/2011 04:14:56 PM 1091 Views
Like I said I can only speak for myself random thoughts - 19/04/2011 04:54:04 PM 1128 Views
There's already a 10 year old in the picture for us Helene - 19/04/2011 06:52:44 PM 1072 Views
My husband and I don't understand why people say this. rebelaessedai - 20/04/2011 01:03:31 AM 1170 Views
I did say I was only speaking for myself random thoughts - 20/04/2011 01:58:45 PM 1102 Views
I know. rebelaessedai - 20/04/2011 09:01:11 PM 1333 Views
Sorry for some reason I thought you had just got married. random thoughts - 20/04/2011 09:52:24 PM 1552 Views
Good luck to them! *NM* rebelaessedai - 22/04/2011 04:25:38 AM 530 Views
Re: The fact that you are referring to a fiancé and comparing it to wife says a lot Tihs Tnuc - 19/04/2011 04:34:34 PM 1010 Views
From the information that you have presented... Jeordam - 19/04/2011 03:50:19 PM 1281 Views
I am in agreement with you, and I'm not particularly Christian. Helene - 19/04/2011 04:11:57 PM 1027 Views
Which is sad (not the agreement, but their potential future) Jeordam - 19/04/2011 06:29:47 PM 1104 Views
Oh yes... I'm of course not sure. I can be way off base :-) Let's hope I am. Helene - 19/04/2011 06:55:13 PM 1096 Views
Could go either way. Dannymac - 19/04/2011 04:36:02 PM 1053 Views
I get the impression that it's more about her forming toward him than vice versa Helene - 19/04/2011 06:56:37 PM 1072 Views
Giving up is one thing, growing past is another. Dannymac - 19/04/2011 10:00:55 PM 1018 Views
Oh, to be fair, he's the friend and she's the wife Helene - 20/04/2011 08:43:12 AM 989 Views
I don't necessarily think it will end in a breakup or divorce. Clover - 19/04/2011 04:44:11 PM 1045 Views
I think you are 100% right about having a good realtionship with your spouse's family random thoughts - 19/04/2011 05:07:12 PM 1056 Views
I think this is about priorities. rebelaessedai - 20/04/2011 01:07:20 AM 1200 Views
Our priorities may shift over time, too. We're still very young and more tied to our families. Clover - 20/04/2011 03:09:54 AM 1005 Views
Even when younger, I was independent. rebelaessedai - 20/04/2011 05:29:59 AM 944 Views
*nods* Clover - 20/04/2011 06:25:29 AM 1127 Views
rebelaessedai - 22/04/2011 04:29:32 AM 1331 Views
Not the former for sure, and maybe not the latter. Palatine - 19/04/2011 05:55:03 PM 1102 Views
I think it's impossible for me to judge their future status without knowing more about them LadyLorraine - 19/04/2011 07:22:32 PM 1057 Views
Can't tell. nossy - 19/04/2011 10:04:27 PM 1020 Views
I'm with the 'can't tell' crowd. Antigone - 19/04/2011 11:37:17 PM 1457 Views
hell, or she could just not care too much at all LadyLorraine - 19/04/2011 11:43:21 PM 1051 Views
What you said in the original question wouldn't neccessarily mean much to me either way. Tashmere - 20/04/2011 01:56:55 AM 1078 Views
It's not all out "she's worthless", it's more like "she's a bit silly with all her wishes" Helene - 20/04/2011 08:46:49 AM 1041 Views
That would still be a deal breaker for me. Tashmere - 20/04/2011 11:49:09 PM 1053 Views
I'm leaning more towards your interpretation. *NM* TaskmasterJack - 20/04/2011 02:15:22 AM 505 Views
I don't know. *NM* (I feel bad for the 20 people who viewed this message- my apologies) Vivien - 20/04/2011 04:36:13 AM 1097 Views
I'm with you on this. *NM* Camilla - 20/04/2011 10:00:41 AM 552 Views
*sigh* Yunalesca - 20/04/2011 09:25:02 PM 1170 Views
Re: I mean, it's not good. *NM* Gaps - 20/04/2011 11:50:21 PM 494 Views
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